How do I know if I've been hacked into?

[daydreams1984]

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[iluvmacs99]

If your ex was trained to work in cybersecurity, he's going to be very good to cover his tracks if he managed to compromise your Air and your smartphone both at the same time. I'm assuming you own an Air since you posted this here. If you suspect that he was able to siphon some information off your FB messenger, it's probably more likely he could have managed to do that and it's hard to just find his footprint. The idea for covert spying is to cover your tracks by exploiting security holes in your system. And usually the willingness of the owner of the computer or phone to install malware which in turn exploited security holes that will then compromise your system. The best way to fix this is to basically do a complete wipe of your computer system and your phone and start over. Use another secured computer with the latest security patches, other than your own or your phone, and change your FB password to a much stronger password so it is harder to be hacked.

However, what is important is you. Why did you attract these kind of people and what can you do to avoid attracting and being with these type of people moving forward? These people usually do this because they love power, or power and control over other people's lives and they loathe to seek that thrill until they see the person suffer in paranoia, in which it is working on you. The best security per-caution I can offer is to examine what is in you that would attract this kind of people, because you will. I used to work in mental health nursing and I had worked with people similar to your EX and they are very smart, articulate, savvy, charming and convincing. But they all shared the same trait -- wanting to control and have power over other people's lives; this case other female nurses. Which was why they hired a male nurse like myself.

 

[Howard2k]

I'd say it's spectacularly unlikely that he's actually SS7 hacking. He may know some concepts and sound convincing, but execution is far more difficult.

But let's say that's true - he has that access and ability - he's not going to leaving behind something as obvious as a simple to spot item in Activity Monitor. I mean, he's probably seen this by now right? If he's monitoring all of your actions.

If you really think that's the case you need to be finding evidence and contacting the police and/or FBI. Not grooming your Activity Monitor page on MacRumors.

Assuming that he's not really able to do these things, but that he does have some genuine ability, then I would seriously consider quarantining my current setup.

Use a fresh secure system to document and change all of my passwords to new and strong passwords. And then I would selectively move over individual data files from my quarantined system to my new system on an as needed basis. Using my new system I'm be using new email accounts, new Apple ID, new Facebook account etc. As much of a new digital footprint as you can build, avoiding all links to my old footprint. Keep the old system offline and just selectively move over as few files as possible, and only data files. Do fresh installs of all apps etc., don't move them over.

Also replace your phone. Get a new phone number, new phone account, new phone provider. Again, you want as few links with your old digital footprint as possible.

That sounds extreme, but it's far less extreme than SS7 hacking.

You should also consider hiring a reputable third party security consultant who can look into some of these things for you.