Is it me or was it rude?

[Artful Dodger]

Hi all,
Just have a question to ask and see what some of you might do if it was you.
I got a gift card emailed to me for my Birthday back in Oct. which was nice. The only "Mild" problem was in order to get the actual gift card mailed to me I had to give my email address or the card was not valid and had a time limit to redeem. Here lies the problem, after I filled out the form my one Gmail account has been hammered by "spam" and I've reported it every time. I've never had spam since I've had a Gmail account and so as a courtesy/heads up warning I told the person what had happened. I didn't want anyone to have the same problems since this person gave all his friends this type of gift and as it would happen most got spam as well.
Now my friend thinks I was being an @ssh*** and made a moutain out of a molehill Yes I thanked him (for the gift) and very nicely (on a different day) told him what happened (sorry I may have left that out).
So if it happened to you would you say anything or not?

 

[mkrishnan]

Hmmm, I guess it could depend on how you said it, but from the way you're telling the story here, it sounds like you were just trying to be nice / acting in good faith. I'm sorry it didn't have a more positive reaction.

What was the gift card to / for, if I might ask, out of curiosity?

 

[Moof1904]

I agree. Assuming you were diplomatic in your delivery, it sounds like the gift giver is being unreasonable in his response. If I gave a gift that turned out to be lame, I'd want to know.

(BTW, "mytrashmail.com" is great for times like this when you must give an email address and you are pretty sure it's going to be hammered.)

 

[stonyc]

Um, I'm confused too... just so that I'm understanding things correctly.

When you notified your friend of the spam problem you had with the gift card, did you thank him at that time?

I only ask because you mention that you thanked him on a different day. If not, I could see how he might interpret that as you informing him something was wrong with the gift (though rightly so).

Also, did anyone else who got the same e-mailed gift have problems with spam?

I guess it would also help to know how you went about informing your friend about the problem with his gift... were you short with him? Did you say or do anything that might have given him the impression that you were less than pleased about the spam problem... but he may have confused that with you being mad about the actual gift itself?

It sounds to me that you only had the best intentions in informing him about the problems you had with his gift, maybe there was some sort of miscommunication along the way.

 

[MongoTheGeek]

Hi all,
Just have a question to ask and see what some of you might do if it was you.
I got a gift card emailed to me for my Birthday back in Oct. which was nice. The only "Mild" problem was in order to get the actual gift card mailed to me I had to give my email address or the card was not valid and had a time limit to redeem. Here lies the problem, after I filled out the form my one Gmail account has been hammered by "spam" and I've reported it every time. I've never had spam since I've had a Gmail account and so as a courtesy/heads up warning I told the person what had happened. I didn't want anyone to have the same problems since this person gave all his friends this type of gift and as it would happen most got spam as well.
Now my friend thinks I was being an @ssh*** and made a moutain out of a molehill Yes I thanked him (for the gift) and very nicely (on a different day) told him what happened (sorry I may have left that out).
So if it happened to you would you say anything or not?

I would like to have been told. I can see how some people would think that it was rude. If I were told I would raise hell with the merchant.

When asked for email addresses I usually provide one that while is actually used regularly gets spam from the 4 corners of the globe.

 

[cubist]

Gift cards are a ripoff, with their fees, expiration, restrictions, etc. Much better idea to just give cash. If you prefer, get a gift check at the bank.

 

[Artful Dodger]

mkrishnan
Hmmm, I guess it could depend on how you said it, but from the way you're telling the story here, it sounds like you were just trying to be nice / acting in good faith. I'm sorry it didn't have a more positive reaction.

What was the gift card to / for, if I might ask, out of curiosity?

It was for Old Navy and it's how they had it set up i.e. redeem gift card, then go to my email and click on link to confirm.

stonyc
Um, I'm confused too... just so that I'm understanding things correctly.

When you notified your friend of the spam problem you had with the gift card, did you thank him at that time?

No actually we went to the store when I got the card in the mail and that's the second time I thanked him, then after a week I tracked down when and after what forms/email was sent who the spam was coming from (as best I could).

stonyc

Also, did anyone else who got the same e-mailed gift have problems with spam?

Yes everyone (B-days were all Oct./Nov) and 5-6 others had some issue with spam within two days, but from the vendor of choice for their gift cards.

The way I said was: I had a small problem after the gift card was confirmed and I know it's the vendor since it has never happened before, I'm getting a lot of spam to my email and could you give me any advise as to report it and hopefully have it stop?
I have had the best results by being honest in this maner rather than flipping out at people due to a companies crappy motives.

Moof1904
I agree. Assuming you were diplomatic in your delivery, it sounds like the gift giver is being unreasonable in his response. If I gave a gift that turned out to be lame, I'd want to know.

(BTW, "mytrashmail.com" is great for times like this when you must give an email address and you are pretty sure it's going to be hammered.)

Thanks for the link I'll pass that on
The bad thing is I couldn't get the gift card with out using an email and I'm sure no one wants spam...hell I don't even like junk mail in my mailbox at home. But it makes the giver look bad and not the company doing this

 

[mkrishnan]

Thanks for the heads up that it was Olds Navy. I'm really surprised that you'd have an issue with such a major retailer, although I believe it. I've just become inured to spam unless it tricks the spam filter....

 

[stonyc]

I'd say your friend is the one making a mountain of a mole hill... you thanked him (from what I can tell, properly and in a timely fashion) and then informed him of a problem you were having with the gift. It didn't sound like you were mean, just matter-of-fact...

To me, it sounds like he should be taking offense at OldNavy for the way they spammed the gift card recipients and not at you for pointing it out. Like you said, it makes him look bad... it could just be that he lashed out at you because he was embarrassed that OldNavy could have f*d his (well-intentioned) gift up and he was taking it out on the closest person he could find, you the messenger.

 

[watcher2001]

Gift cards are a ripoff, with their fees, expiration, restrictions, etc.

I think the best idea is to actually buy a gift for a person. If you don't know their size or their tastes then I tend to like gift cards.
I am not sure that I understand what you mean by fees, expirations, and restrictions? I have never paid a fee for a gift card in my life. The only fee I know of is what they call the "Breakage Fee" This basically means that after a certain amount of card inactivity (Usually a year) they will bleed off a percantage of the balance (Usually 3%) every month until the card is empty. I guess you could look at this as an expiration date as well. However IMHO if you can't spend $50-100 (My average amount given on a GC) in a years time then something is wrong.

Much better idea to just give cash. If you prefer, get a gift check at the bank.

This I disagree with. It is kind of like telling someone you care enough to give them a gift, just not enough to put any thought into it. With a gift card you are at least putting a little thought into it. I used to give money to my brother until I found out he was using the money to buy drugs.
What I usually do now is find out what kind of food people like, then buy them a gift card to an appropriate restaurant so they and their signifigant other can go out and have a really nice meal.

 

[Chundles]

Sorry to be blunt but I think you should both dial 1800 Toughen Up and deal with it.

Little arguments like this should not end a friendship, forget "feelings" and "offending," just get over it, water under a bridge. This person is your mate, mates don't hold grudges, mates don't stay mad. Mates just say "meh, whatever, lets go get a beer."

Stop worrying and just go about your lives.

 

[devilot]

I am not sure that I understand what you mean by fees, expirations, and restrictions? I have never paid a fee for a gift card in my life. The only fee I know of is what they call the "Breakage Fee"

Woo hoo! Go CA! I believe that state law makes it not applicable to us over here-- all these restrictions on gift cards and whatnot. Just take a look at amazon or other e-tailers, in the fine print it usually says something to the effect of, 'except for in states where void or n/a.'

This I disagree with. It is kind of like telling someone you care enough to give them a gift, just not enough to put any thought into it. With a gift card you are at least putting a little thought into it.

I agree. And sometimes gift cards feel really welcome. Example? My boyfriend's brother was sweet and noticed how often he goes to this one coffee shop and gave him a gift card (my bf and I are both pretty broke right now). For a short while, his daily cup of coffee was free-- how nice does that feel? Plus, for other types of stores, it really gives the recepient the freedom to pick and choose what s/he wants and to even put the amount towards a larger purchase.

Not to mention, no 'gift guilt' for either party-- both know that the recepient will get something that s/he really wants. No awkward, "Gee, thanks! I love holiday-themed discount sweater cardigans!"