i was able to do it,
download theme park,
open the file extras.rsrc located in /system/library/frameworks/HIToolbox.framework/versions/a/resources/extras.rsrc
in thempark type 2030 in the search box, press pxm# then root menu center. drag the image you want to change to the desktop and modify with any program. when it is modified, save it as the same name (over right it) the picture you replace it with must have the same shape apple.
then drag the picture back to themepark.
and you have to save that file somewhere, boot into to os 9 if you have it, or any other os and replace the file manually, I had to it in os 9 because os x wounldnt let me modify that folder
also search google to find better instructions if this does not work, but it did for me and now my apple is red, and selected apple is black.