I just upgraded my RAM from 1GB to 4GB (3.3 GB usable) on my white 2.16 GHz 20" iMac 4 days ago. When I first turned the computer on after installing the new RAM, I didn't notice any difference in speed, which was a little alarming, but I rebooted again, and now it is much snappier, and I don't have any lagging when I have a gazillion programs running at once anymore. I keep Mail, iTunes, iCal, and EyeTV open all the time while running various other programs, and I always have more than one Safari window open for some reason. EyeTV runs much faster now (when converting shows to iPod format), too. Also, when I tell a program to quit, it does it almost immediately, where before it had to "think about it." I haven't had to do any force quits since I upgraded, where before I had to do one almost every day, most likely because I tend to keep a lot of programs open at once. I also notice that iPhoto updates my web galleries faster, and I don't get as many beach balls as I used to. It was like getting a new computer again.
I never thought the computer was slow before, either. I wasn't even sure I needed to upgrade the RAM. Considering how much faster my iMac was than any PC I ever had, whatever slowness I perceived with the original RAM was insignificant, but I wanted to see what this baby can really do. I'm glad I did. I can't believe the performance I get from this system! It acts like a much more expensive computer. I say upgrade as much as you can and don't look back. RAM doesn't cost that much as long as you don't get it from Apple (I got my 4 GB from OWC for $155), so why not?