@fhopper This is an ongoing problem that first surfaced with the M1 generation.
There seems to be a mismatch between Apple's TB4/5 ports and the older USB 3.x enclosure controller chipsets, when is comes to power management during standby, and especially sleep.
I have never suffered this problem, because there is a reliable workaround:
Apple does Thunderbolt really (really) well. So only connect Thunderbolt devices to the TB4/5 ports on the Mac.
To connect USB 3.x devices to your Mac, connect them to the USB-A/C ports on a self-powered Thunderbolt 3 (
not TB4/5) dock, and connect that to the Mac, using a certified TB3/4/5 cable.
That way, the dock's USB 3.x controller is managing the peripherals, and power management with well behaved external devices works as expected.
It has to be a TB3 dock, because TB4 and TB5 work differently, and still use the Mac's USB 3.x controller to manage the USB 3.x peripherals.
USB4 is generally fine, it's just older USB 3.x peripherals that fail to stay connected when directly connected.
One further point:
As Apple hasn't managed to rectify this problem, my guess that it could only be solved at the expense of the proper working of the high speed TB4/5 ports.
So complaining about this isn't going to make a difference, we have to live with this. 😉