AgreedI was annoyed at how little control you have over FB events in the calendar as well. I only wanted to see events I've RSVP'd to and I wanted to be able to easily clear them away if I wanted. I ended up disabling the Facebook/OS integration and did this:
- On Facebook, go to the Events page
- On the events page, click the gear in the top right corner (next to "Today") and go to Settings first
- Select your options here, Hide Declined, Hide Invites, (these two should cover what you want I believe), Hide Suggested, etc
- Select Export from the Gear
- Add the Cal link to iCal
- Include that Calendar in your iCloud calendars and sync that with your phone
This has allowed me to see only events I've RSVP'd to on my calendar (don't want to see invites, suggested events, or declined events so this worked perfectly for me). Hope that helps!