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Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by Spectrum Abuser, Jun 4, 2015.

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  1. Spectrum Abuser, Jun 4, 2015
    Last edited: Jun 5, 2015

    Spectrum Abuser macrumors 65816

    Spectrum Abuser

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    Aug 27, 2011
  2. rick snagwell macrumors 68040

    rick snagwell

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    oceanside, ca
  3. lowendlinux Contributor

    lowendlinux

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    Sep 24, 2014
    Location:
    North Country (way upstate NY)
    #4
    You sound like a 19 year old to me. The Air Force will be fun, just find any job before you ship preferably one that requires some physical effort. I'd personally look at temp jobs on loading docks or warehouses.
     
  4. zhenya macrumors 603

    zhenya

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    #5
    :) I have to agree with @lowendlinux that you sound like a 19 year old. That's a good thing, btw. At 19 it's completely natural not to want to be tied down with a house and family. Take advantage of this period in your life and try many different things. That exposure will help you determine what you really want as you age and mature.

    I felt a similar way at your age - through my teens and early 20's most of my friends were older than me, usually much older 10,20, even 30 years. I had no interest in the things that occupied my peers. Still, don't be in a hurry to dismiss any period of your life, or adhere to one specific path at this early stage. You'll no doubt be surprised by what life brings.

    I will also say, that as someone who professes a desire to understand the world around you, don't underestimate the power that having a family of your own instills in you to further that understanding. Of course everyone has the right to decide on their own what they want, but I am amazed every day how my kids change not only my external view of the world, but also my internal self, and do so in a way that would be utterly impossible to experience without them.
     
  5. 63dot macrumors 603

    63dot

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    norcal
    #6
    You may be an old soul and looking for more and right now the stable life with house and/or career may not be for you.

    Stretch and see if you still feel this way in a few years. Many extremely successful people often find that getting married later, having traveled and studied and embarked on self discovery first, is a great idea.

    There could still be a lot of happiness in getting your house, car, and family and live an unremarkable, anonymous life. A lot of people will argue that this is one's best chance at happiness because it's predictable and safe. Predictability and safety become much more important after age 30.

    But you could be one of the very few who take a different path and invent something huge or come up with a new philosophy or stand out in an amazing way.

    When I was 19 I was convinced that I would be different and make a huge mark in music (or something like writing or art) and never ever settle like the rest and get married and live a quiet life. I wanted to be a rebel and live the rock and roll lifestyle and tour and record music many would hear. I didn't want to do college and end up fifty with a string of safe jobs, safe clothes, married, get into a routine, and have an almost invisible footprint.

    Well other than a brief college radio hit with no followup and a few really fun years playing and writing music I got to perform, I eventually got a degree, got married, and settled into a quiet, anonymous life. I still do music but only at small clubs and I drive a Volvo and dress like an off duty cop or republican. I go to sleep early and entertainment is just a few popular TV shows. I am everything today what I didn't want to be when I was 19. My thoughts and political beliefs are the same but instead of being radical I only think it.

    But what really matters, since you can't keep your youth, looks, strength, energy, drive, health, possessions, or money, is that you find happiness.

    In all the striving to better yourself, get good credit, build a career, build a reputation, take care of your house, maintain your health, etc, it's all useless and futile if you don't find happiness. Additionally if you don't love and help your fellow man, then things can be pretty empty, too.

    When you are middle aged (or older) or retired, having happiness and having sought it all your life is all you will care about.
     
  6. mobilehaathi macrumors G3

    mobilehaathi

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    #7
    However you may feel, only the immature would so brazenly claim this for themselves.
     
  7. GGJstudios macrumors Westmere

    GGJstudios

    Joined:
    May 16, 2008
    #8
    A part of the "enlightenment" that comes with age is the awareness that simply understanding the world around us does not make a well-rounded and fulfilling life. What we contribute to the world is equally important. Find a need and fill it. Find something you can do that can better life for others, and you can find a way to generate an income in doing so.
     
  8. maflynn Moderator

    maflynn

    Staff Member

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    May 3, 2009
    Location:
    Boston
    #9
    I don't think anyone wants to hold down a job, but with maturity comes insight that you need a roof over your head, food on the table and clothes on your back. You cannot count on your parents to provide those essentials forever so you like most of us, needs to find a job regardless if we have any desire for such.

    My advise is to find a vocation that you enjoy doing, do you like taking pictures/photography? Then perhaps look into being a photographer. Love the outdoors, perhaps some forestry job like a park ranger.

    By the way I've known a lot of self enlightened people in my life and more often then not they were very young as yourself. That is at your age you think you have everything down pat and know more then your age belies. We were all there before, and come to realize in time that was not the case.

    As for the Air Force, I think that's a great opportunity, you'll learn a trade, get room/board/clothes. If you stick with it, you'll have a job for life and a nice retirement pension. My stepson was in the marines and he only did one tour - shortly after getting back in to civilian life, he realized that he would have been better off if he remained in the service. Keep that in mind, jobs are hard to come by and staying in the service could be a viable option.
     
  9. Spectrum Abuser thread starter macrumors 65816

    Spectrum Abuser

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2011
    #10
    Only quoting part of a sentence is equally as absurd as brazenly claiming that that a young person is extremely enlightened. I said CONSIDERING my physical age. That implies that my experience is limited to my time spent alive. Of course, though, you couldn't quote that or your post would have no further meaning.

    I covered everything you mentioned in my second paragraph. Maybe you missed it. I do agree with your bit about finding a niche or trade as to at least make the prospect of doing something over and over enjoyable. And I wish I had the confidence to say I knew everything. If I did I wouldn't of made this thread. I'm aware of my short comings; why I'm asking for advice from people who had been born before me.
     
  10. mobilehaathi macrumors G3

    mobilehaathi

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    #11
    Your qualifier is irrelevant.
     
  11. Spectrum Abuser thread starter macrumors 65816

    Spectrum Abuser

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    #12
    Then we both agree to disagree.
     
  12. 63dot macrumors 603

    63dot

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    Location:
    norcal
    #13
    If you know what you want to do, meet and talk to a person that has reached a point in their career that you would want to be at. If you want to be an English professor, get to know one. If you want to be a detective, get to know one. If you want to be a member of the clergy, get to know one. Talking to anybody deep into a field you want to be in will teach you more than any book can.

    When I was a musician just learning and trying to get things sorted out I was lucky to be in a band with an older person who had become rich doing it and pretty much a pop star in his time (earlier years as teen and twenties) having been on Ed Sullivan a lot. He pretty much said what everyone is saying on this thread and seriously wished he had lived a normal life, in obscurity, and finding a safe job. Placing yourself high on the Billboard charts put an extraordinary amount of stress from the managers and record company pushing you to write and record songs and get there again. No matter how many times his band had a hit, the bar was put up higher and the stress increased. He pretty much told me that there were no laurels in the music business. I knew, deep down inside, that what he was saying was the absolute truth but I didn't want to listen to him. In my head I thought if the "other" guitarist in my band could do it and get a few top 40s, so can I.

    He told me about how awful it was to be around security and have girls rock your limousine back and forth and pull at your hair and clothes. He truly hated that after a very short time but then had to endure it for years. But to me, being young, I thought this was a very cool dilemma to be in.

    The stress of the road, and fame, contributed to his drinking which eventually killed him a few years after our band broke up and then I understood. He could never get back those years where he said a person should be discovering themselves and getting a foot in the door. Being a big popstar is not discovering yourself and almost every person who has attained that realize that it was more luck than anything else. From the viewpoint of small town musicians like me, he had made it and "should" be happy, but from his perspective he lost a lot of good years being put into this vortex of fame, fans, and ultimately unnatural stress. So when I see a Miley Cyrus or Britney Spears fly off the deep end, I totally understand since it happened to my bandmate.

    So it's one thing for a musician who had not made it to tell me to get a regular job and life and do music as a hobby, but it was amazing to get a chance to get to know this man who had gone big and still said it's better to get a job and regular life, and that it was his one big regret that he never got that chance. We all need food, water, and shelter but another need is for a reasonably sane life, and popstar (my goal as a young person) is not reasonably sane.
     
  13. Arran macrumors 68040

    Arran

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2008
    Location:
    Atlanta, USA
    #14
    I think we all felt like masters of the universe at 19. A few years in college and you come out realizing how little you know about anything. And even with a few more decades under your belt, it doesn't get any better. Seriously.

    And don't worry too much now about what you'll do when you get out. You'll be a different person and will figure it out then.
     
  14. lowendlinux Contributor

    lowendlinux

    Joined:
    Sep 24, 2014
    Location:
    North Country (way upstate NY)
    #15
    Sometimes it's best to close your mouth and open your ears you will figure those times out very quickly. There are times to advocate until you're blue in the face because it the right thing to do. There is never a time to take your toys and go home, that's simply passive aggressive. Your OP was a little self-congratulatory but nothing to bad, people picked up on and tried to take you down a notch which you deserved I didn't because you will be falling far and fast in a few months. You put something out there, take your lumps and the advice that comes with them.
     
  15. Beachguy macrumors 6502a

    Beachguy

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    Nov 23, 2011
    #16
    63dot, having been there in a related career, you speak MUCH truth. I knew many stars, and most were wretchedly miserable.

    But the wisdom of that which you speak is nearly impossible to understand at 19 years old.
     
  16. Spectrum Abuser thread starter macrumors 65816

    Spectrum Abuser

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    Aug 27, 2011
    #17
    Seemed pretty straight forward to me. I can't fathom how anyone could misinterpret his story.

    You see this is why I'd rather the thread be closed. No doubt there was some solid advice, but I didn't need a condescending trip. I get that enough in real life. And the universe is a pretty big place. How anyone could feel the master of it is beyond me. I'm struggling just trying to make sense of an earth experience.
     
  17. mobilehaathi macrumors G3

    mobilehaathi

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    Aug 19, 2008
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    The Anthropocene
    #18
    If you wish your thread to be closed, you may report it with the request.
     
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