I have television news experience and I agree with what the others said. The talking heads (especially the reporter's) are oddly framed. See how the news stations will give a small amount of headroom on top, with more space to show the reporter holding a mic and/or making hand gestures for emphasis. Keep in mind where the lower-third graphic will be on the screen and leave room for it. The legislator kind of had his chin covered by it.
Two things about camerawork: use a tripod whenever it's even remotely possible, even if it seems like a hassle. It really makes a big difference. Of course, some things happen too fast, or you have to move quickly or while walking to get the shot. Especially with so many videos being transmitted on the web, steady shots are critical to decent compression.
Some of them might have been better if they'd been a bit more dynamic. Maybe a zoom-out or a pan to give the viewer an idea of how many people were there. A camera move like that keeps the viewer's attention better than a static shot of a group of people, even though you're basically showing them the same thing. Try these moves at different speeds or framings because you never know which will work and which won't. Experiment with different shots. For example, what if you were limited to a piece that was half as long as what you came up with? How much would you be able to show effectively? Television news has very strict time constraints.
The others were right about the audio being a bit inconsistent. Some of the cuts were jarring. It's worth it to get a long chunk of background noise that you can fill in for the parts that don't have enough of it. The writing was pretty good, but try to give your narration some more emphasis. Right now it sounds kind of somber, a little resigned to what's going on. Give it some oomph by modulating your voice to convey the importance of the story. By that I don't mean you have to go all "Access Hollywood" about it, but it needs some gravitas. Watch "The NewsHour," PBS's nightly newscast for ideas on how to be emphatic without being over-the-top.
All in all, I think it was pretty good. Certainly better than most student journalists would come up with, especially if your field is journalism and not television broadcasting. Let's put it this way: when I was in college, I was graded on videos that looked worse than that. So keep at it.
