Anyone Divorced?

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by svalentine, Mar 19, 2009.

  1. svalentine macrumors regular

    Apr 29, 2007
    Tokyo, Japan
    My wife of only 2 years cheated on me and I'm single now. The emotions you go through can easily be shown with smilies :eek::(:mad:and now:)
  2. Anonymouslives macrumors 6502


    Apr 26, 2008

    You're definitely not alone man! I hear you 100%. I wish you well bro.
  3. dukebound85 macrumors P6


    Jul 17, 2005
    5045 feet above sea level
    is it worth getting married? lol

    im somewhat kidding/serious
  4. marbles macrumors 68000


    Apr 30, 2008
    EU mostly
    #4 brother once told me > if it bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die-don't trust it
  5. TuffLuffJimmy macrumors G3


    Apr 6, 2007
    Portland, OR
    I live by those words.

    I'm too young to get married, and I have yet to find that special someone. Either way getting married is not high on my list of things to do.

    My mom has been divorced thrice (my father was her first husband) and my dad has been divorced two times. That's a total of four failed marriages just between my parents. Don't get me started on my aunts, uncles and grandparents. I have an extremely hard family tree to illustrate, Bravo Tango Whiskey.
  6. mscriv macrumors 601


    Aug 14, 2008
    Dallas, Texas
    No matter how, what, or why, the bottom line is divorce sucks for all involved, especially the kids. But don't lose hope, marriage is worth it and two committed people can be successful at it. I'm a professional counselor with a degree in marriage and family therapy. I tell people who ask me about marriage that you know your ready when you've found the person that you want to spend the rest of your life serving. It's not about what you get, but what you give. So many relationships fail because people are looking for someone else to meet their needs instead of focusing on how they can meet their partners needs. Sorry to hear about your circumstances. It sounds like your ex-wife had the kind of selfish approach I've seen too many times. She obviously didn't put you first if she was stepping out. Hang in there through the roller coaster of emotions you mentioned. Things will get better.
  7. svalentine thread starter macrumors regular

    Apr 29, 2007
    Tokyo, Japan
    Luckily no kids were involved, a couple pets but thats no biggie. I can't believe we were actually seeing a fertility doctor, paying good money to help us get pregnant and then this happens. It's just mind blowing and hurt a lot. I'm in the military and luckily I'm getting a change of scenery by moving to Japan next month.

    It's amazing how much your mind can go through. Just need to keep your head up and never look back (well only to learn from your mistakes).

    Just curious if anyone else went through something similar.
  8. jizwood1 macrumors member

    Jul 24, 2008
    Luckily no kid was involved, and I am gald I am not married yet.
  9. Lau Guest


    Fortunately, my mum told me not to trust people who consistently make dickish comments on the internet.

    svalentine, I'm glad you've got a positive outlook on this. I hope things work out for you.
  10. arkitect macrumors 603


    Sep 5, 2005
    Bath, United Kingdom
    Even by the standards of this board's teenage testosterone machismo that is pretty dire.

    @ marbles:
    You should perhaps rethink your little bio on your profile… 'cause, hon' deep thinker is one thing you ain't. And hopefully not what you're busy educating your children.

    @ TuffLuffJimmy: If you really do… god help the women in your life.
  11. calculus Guest


    Dec 12, 2005
    What an insightful fellow. I hope that he is giving you advice in other areas too. Hopefully this will mean that neither of you pass on your genes.
  12. bartelby macrumors Core


    Jun 16, 2004
    Too late for that apparently.
  13. iBlue macrumors Core


    Mar 17, 2005
    London, England
    Seeeeriously! What is going on in these forums lately? :rolleyes::confused: Was there an internet misogyny meeting I was not made aware of?

    I also have to laugh at the implication that women are the only ones to pull shenanigans.

    On topicly, svalentine, I'm sorry to hear it. I know that range of emotions from both ends of the spectrum. I think you've got a good attitude about it, no sense dwelling for too long. :)
  14. MattG macrumors 68040


    May 27, 2003
    Asheville, NC
    I'm more a fan of the adage, "if it has t**s or wheels, it's going to give you problems."

    (not really) ;)
  15. calculus Guest


    Dec 12, 2005
    Yes, although obviously women weren't invited.

    In retrospect this may have been a mistake as they could have made the sandwiches or something. ;)

    To the OP, I hope that things work out for you and that you are able to make a new start out of this.
  16. ghoztman macrumors regular

    May 23, 2008
    I was married for 4 months :) We had been together for years before she turned wild and feral. Stay away from Swedish women abroad, they'll want to take you home to Sweden as some exotic import, then they suffer from Swede-creep and it's all over.

    I contacted her a couple of years later and thanked her, I let her know divorce was the best thing that ever happened to me.

    Divorce set me free, I went off and did a bunch of things I would otherwise never have been afforded.

    Go out and get a T-Shirt printed, then take up walking or jogging. Your T-Shirt should read:

    I am recently divorced

    It'll work a treat, trust me. ;)
  17. Dagless macrumors Core


    Jan 18, 2005
    Fighting to stay in the EU
    Demi pwn! My sentiments too.

    We've only had 1 divorce in my family, and that was between 2 folk who got together and had a kid at 16, married at 17. She remarried and its all good now.
    I'm looking forward to being married.
  18. chuckcalo macrumors regular

    Jan 27, 2009
    Divorce happens when you don't get to know the person the way you should.
  19. Jpoon macrumors 6502a


    Feb 26, 2008
    Los Angeles California
    Stuff happens. I feel for you man, but one unfortunate event shouldn't make one resort to chauvinistic remarks like one made in this thread.

    Good luck in finding someone that treats you right.
  20. sushi Moderator emeritus


    Jul 19, 2002
    True in some cases. There are other reasons for divorce as well.

    To the OP, it will be nice to change your venue. When you get to Japan, there are so many things to see and do. It will be a great way to move on. :)
  21. ravenvii macrumors 604


    Mar 17, 2004
    Melenkurion Skyweir
    lulz @ this.

    But I hope you didn't take it seriously. Women are great!

    At least, the good ones. . . .

    @ OP: Wish I could help, but I'm too young (well not really, but I'd like to think I am) to be in your situation.
  22. nobunaga209 macrumors 6502a


    Mar 13, 2009
    Feel your pain...I'm a year removed from a 5 year tour of duty with my ex. Thought she was the one, we built a house together, have a beautiful 3 year old daughter..meh, just wasn't meant to be.
  23. TuffLuffJimmy macrumors G3


    Apr 6, 2007
    Portland, OR
    awwe I love girls, but I'm queer so I don't see this as a big issue in my future.
  24. mkrishnan Moderator emeritus


    Jan 9, 2004
    Grand Rapids, MI, USA
    Very true. It's ridiculous to try and simplify relationships down to inane "all men are pigs" or "all women are bitches" kinds of idiocy.

    To the OP, best of luck in the next phase of your life. :)
  25. TuffLuffJimmy macrumors G3


    Apr 6, 2007
    Portland, OR
    yeah, those are just two factors that go into it.

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