Approaching a girl (stranger) at Starbucks?

[MegaMillions]

I always approach women at Starbucks and I always get laid and/or fall in love. Always. Sound stupid so far? Well listen up. The most important thing is appearance. Just yesterday I barged into a Starbucks wearing skin tight acid-washed jean shorts and a frayed terri cloth half shirt. I had hemp anklets running up to my knees and turquoise Aqua-Socks on. Did I look like an absolute moron? You bet I did! I also got everyones attention, including the ladies. 65% of them looked away in utter disgust. This is good, for these people truly disgust me as well. This helps thin the herd. This gorgeous young nubile bird was giggling at the corner table and couldn't keep her eyes off of me. A woman with a sense of humor, nice.

I order a cinnamon dolce grande and approach the lovely lass. I stop about 2 feet in front of her table and stand as rigid as a statue. I bring the straw up towards my lips and stop about an inch shy of contact. I suck as hard as I can with my cheeks puckered up like an exaggerated fish and my face as red as some losers Ferrari. She looks at me and says "What the hell are you doing?". "Seducing You", I reply. A few seconds of mutual deadpan silence, and then we both expel hearty laughter in unison. Fast forward 3 hours and I have just finished a session of some of the greatest coitus I have ever experienced.

Interesting. So this happens regularly?

 

[imaketouchtheme]

I always approach women at Starbucks and I always get laid and/or fall in love. Always. Sound stupid so far? Well listen up. The most important thing is appearance. Just yesterday I barged into a Starbucks wearing skin tight acid-washed jean shorts and a frayed terri cloth half shirt. I had hemp anklets running up to my knees and turquoise Aqua-Socks on. Did I look like an absolute moron? You bet I did! I also got everyones attention, including the ladies. 65% of them looked away in utter disgust. This is good, for these people truly disgust me as well. This helps thin the herd. This gorgeous young nubile bird was giggling at the corner table and couldn't keep her eyes off of me. A woman with a sense of humor, nice.

I order a cinnamon dolce grande and approach the lovely lass. I stop about 2 feet in front of her table and stand as rigid as a statue. I bring the straw up towards my lips and stop about an inch shy of contact. I suck as hard as I can with my cheeks puckered up like an exaggerated fish and my face as red as some losers Ferrari. She looks at me and says "What the hell are you doing?". "Seducing You", I reply. A few seconds of mutual deadpan silence, and then we both expel hearty laughter in unison. Fast forward 3 hours and I have just finished a session of some of the greatest coitus I have ever experienced.

I'm begging you to have someone record this scenario the next time it happens.

Please?

 

[coolwater]

I always approach women at Starbucks and I always get laid and/or fall in love. Always. Sound stupid so far? Well listen up. The most important thing is appearance. Just yesterday I barged into a Starbucks wearing skin tight acid-washed jean shorts and a frayed terri cloth half shirt. I had hemp anklets running up to my knees and turquoise Aqua-Socks on. Did I look like an absolute moron? You bet I did!

LOL. Care to post your pic? If your story is true, you should be on TV.

 

[Rt&Dzine]

Well if nothing else, GrannySmith_G5 you are a great story teller. I hope you are a writer of some sort.

 

[Melrose]

I always approach women at Starbucks and I always get laid and/or fall in love. Always. Sound stupid so far? Well listen up. The most important thing is appearance. Just yesterday I barged into a Starbucks wearing skin tight acid-washed jean shorts and a frayed terri cloth half shirt. I had hemp anklets running up to my knees and turquoise Aqua-Socks on. Did I look like an absolute moron? You bet I did! I also got everyones attention, including the ladies. 65% of them looked away in utter disgust. This is good, for these people truly disgust me as well. This helps thin the herd. This gorgeous young nubile bird was giggling at the corner table and couldn't keep her eyes off of me. A woman with a sense of humor, nice.

I order a cinnamon dolce grande and approach the lovely lass. I stop about 2 feet in front of her table and stand as rigid as a statue. I bring the straw up towards my lips and stop about an inch shy of contact. I suck as hard as I can with my cheeks puckered up like an exaggerated fish and my face as red as some losers Ferrari. She looks at me and says "What the hell are you doing?". "Seducing You", I reply. A few seconds of mutual deadpan silence, and then we both expel hearty laughter in unison. Fast forward 3 hours and I have just finished a session of some of the greatest coitus I have ever experienced.

You write like the narrator of some clichéd 1930s Sam Spade drama, only with less class more and sleaze.

 

[phas3]

i went to a wedding last sunday, it was at a hotel and as soon as I got there, a very beautiful receptionist caught my eye at the front desk. As the wedding went on, I saw her passing by the reception we had and I walked up to her asking if she wanted to stay a bit and have a few laughs. Well she was already off work and said that she was exhausted so I asked her if she just wanted to hangout some other time. She gave me her number and she's texting me right now...confidence gets you a long ways.

 

[killerrobot]

Sounds like a great opportunity for one of those missed connections personal ad things.