I dropped by to check what was up and it turns out they had a phone for me after all. The manager said he's tried to call me a few times but the line had been busy. I actually believe him, since when they activated the stupid thing it had three missed calls that had most definitely never rung to my limbophone.
Regardless, baby is charging/restoring/syncing at the moment. Will get to play later.
I should also say that their activation process was quick, smooth, and painless. They really had their act together, as far as I could tell. It's a shame Apple was so secretive about their inventory, it really ended up reflecting badly on folks who had no control over the situation, i.e. the retailers.