Better to set up family sharing or give kids the boot?

Discussion in 'iOS 12' started by servenvolley, Sep 29, 2018.

  1. servenvolley macrumors newbie

    Jan 3, 2017
    South Carolina
    So with the new update to IOS 12, my family (me, wife, three kids ages 13, 20, 23) are now all sharing the same stupid text every time we try to text each other and we can sometimes read each others texts to others. I've had enough of this and I'd like to get everyone off my Apple ID and on their own. Does anyone have any idea if its better to set all of this up on family sharing (still under my ID though I believe) or have them get and set up their own accounts with Apple and start over? Also, would my family members be in danger of losing their contacts and music and things like that? As a side note, it would have been nice if Apple had mentioned this major inconvenience before suggesting we all update our software.
  2. Russcolli macrumors newbie

    Sep 21, 2018
    If you all need your own individual iMessage accounts (which seems sensible) then yes, you will all need to have your own apple ids. whether you wish to use family sharing depends a bit on what you are looking to share. For example, I use family sharing with my children (whose devices are configured with their own apple ids) as we have an Apple Music family account and I share app purchases with them. Things that are harder to share are contacts and calendars. I used to try to manage central contacts and share them with the kids but to be honest they sort of like to make their own - and anyway its not really possible to share contacts is everyone's device is set up using their own apple id. You can share calendars from iCal but in effect its like you're inviting them to each appointment you load.

    Using family sharing you can, if you want to, limit what the child accounts can do etc. You can also share locations so you can always find each other's devices using Find My iPhone.

    Hope that helps a little.

  3. servenvolley thread starter macrumors newbie

    Jan 3, 2017
    South Carolina
    Yes, good thoughts, thanks for responding.
  4. Fireproof! macrumors 6502a


    Dec 1, 2008
    Frisco, TX
    Definitely set up each family member with their own Apple ID. You can use their own existing email addresses or have Apple create an iCloud address for them. For my daughters, I used their gmail addresses.

    Once that’s done - you will avoid seeing/reading each other’s texts, etc. And everyone will have their OWN calendar, contacts, email, itunes playlists, song favorites, etc, etc.

    Then you can decide how you want to manage them from there. For me - I added my daughters and wife as “family members” under the family sharing. That way all purchases can be shared, and use my credit card. I have my wife set as an “adult” or whatever so she can purchase anything without asking for approval. I have my kids set as “kids” with authorization required, so if they want to purchase any apps, etc, it sends notification to me and my wife asking for approval first.

    Really works quite seamlessly.
  5. Steve28, Sep 30, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 30, 2018

    Steve28 macrumors regular

    Jun 14, 2011
    AppleIDs are like social security numbers. Everyone should have their own. And at this point, probably be issued one at birth.

    Once everyone has their own appleID, then you can decide whether to include them in your "family" as @Fireproof! mentioned.

    How a lot of this confusion started was that once iTunes became so popular and everyone in a household had an Apple device, they didn't want to have to buy a song 5 times so the spouse and kids could all have it. After all, when you bought a CD, it wasn't only the purchaser that could listen to it. So frequently families would share an AppleID so all the purchased music (and eventually Apps) would be available to everyone.

    Then iCloud came along to sync personal data (contacts, notes, email, texts, documents, etc.) between devices. Lots of people didn't realize that this was always intended to be tied to an individual or that it was separate from the iTunes login, so they did what they did with iTunes accounts - the whole family signed in to the same iCloud account with the same shared iTunes credentials. Then mass "Why am I seeing all of my spouses texts??" confusion began.

    Big confusion point: You can actually be signed in to one account for iTunes and App Store and a different account for iCloud.

    Therefore it is technically possible to share an AppleID for purchases while still keeping all of your 'personal' data separate by using a shared AppleID for Settings->iTunes & App Store and an individual AppleID for iCloud. However this is still bad practice because anyone signed in can buy stuff at any point. It's like everyone having access to your Amazon account.

    So Apple then came up with Family Sharing where you can designate up to 6, I think, other AppleIDs to be considered part of your Family. Then the AppleID who started the Family can designate Adults and Children and what they can/cannot do and things like if a child wants to purchase an app, one of the Adult accounts would get a notification asking for permission. It also allows developers to designate that their app can be purchased once and used on all devices within a family.

    @servenvolley - what you should do, IMO: Get everyone to sign up for an AppleID. Have them sign in to iCloud on their devices with that ID. That will get them to where they each have their personal data separate. Now you have a choice:

    option 1) You have them also sign in to iTunes and App Store with their new Apple ID then you add that Apple ID to your "Family". At this point any Apps you bought before that are allowed to be 'family shared' will still be available to them (they might have to download again). Any apps that are not allowed to be family shared will have to be re-purchased by the user. For Music... Any music that was purchased under your AppleID will not be available to them unless you sign up for an Apple Music family plan.

    option 2) *this is still not ideal* you have them still stay signed in to your Apple ID for iTunes and App Store. The issue here is that anyone on this account can make purchases as if they are you. But everything they have now would continue to be that way. Eventually though this will become unsustainable as they go off and have their own families, etc.

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4 September 29, 2018