Business Card Critique

Discussion in 'Design and Graphics' started by -kritter-, Apr 5, 2008.

  1. -kritter- macrumors regular

    -kritter-

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2007
    Location:
    Idaho
    #1
    Something I have been working on in the wee hours of the morning. It is basically the cover of a business card, the other side will contain contact information. So just let me know what you think, and what you personally would change to improve how this thing looks.


    [​IMG]
     
  2. CINA macrumors newbie

    CINA

    Joined:
    Mar 20, 2008
    Location:
    Tokyo
    #2
    Crit

    Right, well i think that the card portrays your business well. I like the diagonal lines, and i like that they are not crisp, as your business is to do with cattle, therefore this line quality echoes this well. I like the two tone color palette, but there are a couple of things that i personally would change.

    I prefer to design cards in a landscape format as that is the more "traditional" orientation. Also your graphics and company are not "design" based therefore it doesn't make so much sense to have a portrait oriented card. Generally more design based or arty businesses employ portrait oriented cards.

    The second is keep the back super simple, as the front has a lot going on with the diagonal lines etc, personally I would just have the details printed on the back and not a lot else.
     
  3. klymr macrumors 65816

    Joined:
    May 16, 2007
    Location:
    Utah
    #3
    I don't know exactly what look you are going for, but I can tell you one thing is really irritating me about it. The two tangents at the top and bottom of the circle in the middle. You need to move the boxes up and down so they aren't just barely touching the circle. I can't stand to look at it because of that, well, at least it think that's the reason.

    Something with the type is also bothering me. I think you need to increase the size of the text inside the circle. It needs hierarchy. Not enough variety in sizes of things. Good start on it all though. Just keep working at it!
     
  4. bogman12 macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2007
    #4
    "Not enough variety in sizes of things."

    Gotta be kidding me.. totally useless comment. This is a good design that is keeping to a theme very well. The unevenness in the lines at the bottom works well with the "weathered" look I think you are going for. So in keeping with the worn out look, perhaps the silhouette of the cattle should be grunged up a little bit. Perhaps apply a grunge layer on it as a layer mask.

    Keep in mind the demographics of the ppl on this forum.. only a small minority is qualified to give constructive criticisms.
     
  5. -kritter- thread starter macrumors regular

    -kritter-

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    Idaho
    #5
    Thank you all so far, this is starting to look better. Keep the suggestions coming!

    [​IMG]
     
  6. juanster macrumors 68020

    juanster

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Location:
    toronto
    #6
    I am no pro at this, and id on't pretend to be either, I really like teh second one a lot better, specially what you did with the cow, but i think if the color of the cow was juuuuuuust a little bit darker, not as much as the lines but right in btw where it is now and the lines, it would look better, IMO...
     
  7. klymr macrumors 65816

    Joined:
    May 16, 2007
    Location:
    Utah
    #7
    Yes, I guess I must know nothing about good design. All these years of schooling must now be tossed out the door because I offered my opinion and someone said it's totally useless. :rolleyes:

    From the list of "Common Compositional Errors" given to me by a professor:



    Having seen many, many examples of people that have not followed these rules (and yes, they can be broken, but you have to make sure it's for a good cause), and then gone back and fixed them it makes all the difference. I've been a victim of bad design myself, but we have to remember a design can always be improved.

    Does that mean that since the OP isn't a trained designer that he isn't qualified to post here either? Remember, the culture of design is criticism. Critiques/criticism is what pushes people to improve. I was just helping out with my ideas.


    -kritter-, you are doing great. Just keep up with the work here. I like this second version a lot better. Try one with the bars not so far up and down on the card. Just play around with it like you are! I like the text a little better like that too. It makes the name of the business seem more important than the couples names or the town where they are located, which is probably what you want. Anyway, keep at it. You are doing just fine!
     
  8. Abraxsis macrumors 6502

    Abraxsis

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2003
    Location:
    Kentucky
    #8
    This is an obvious flame. Anyone so pretentious as to say that only design educated individuals are qualified to give criticisms is completely ludicrous. Might I remind the poster that a designer usually works for someone who knows NOTHING about design whatsoever. Do you simply discount what they say because of their lack of qualifications? I have zero art education and yet I am the Art Director of a toy company. I have 120+ in-market packaging designs ... many of which break 99% of the rules ... and I love it. I suppose my lack of education, and my blatant disregard for the "rules" makes me a poor candidate to offer my advice.

    That being said, I do like the grunge effect the OP has used. I think it is a solid overall theme. Of course take that with a grain of salt, since I (and most of the people here) are unqualified to give an opinion.
     
  9. RaceTripper macrumors 68030

    Joined:
    May 29, 2007
    #9
    My $0.02 about business cards. Don't cover both sides. People often need to jot notes on a business card to add some context to how/when/where/why they got it. If you don't allow enough space on your card for that, many will get thrown away after being given out.

    For many years my company put some marketing info on the back side of our business cards and I hated it. I could never use them to jot notes on because there was no room to. Now our cards are blank on the reverse side, as they should be.
     
  10. sushi Moderator emeritus

    sushi

    Joined:
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    キャンプスワ&#
    #10
    I like this one better.

    I would suggest, that if you hand your card to the person in the vertical mode (Portrait) then consider moving the boxes a little bit more towards center so you can see everything when handing your card.

    I like the simplicity of the card and the message. However, I prefer the cow on the first one. I like the solid look. Reminds me of Angus cattle.

    On the backside, you can put all the detailed info which keeps the front side clean.

    As some have said, horizontal (Landscape) is more common. Here in Japan, when I came here that is, everything was vertical because of the Japanese text. Now days, many have changed to horizontal style. Go with what feels best. In your case, I think vertical is best.
     
  11. -kritter- thread starter macrumors regular

    -kritter-

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2007
    Location:
    Idaho
    #11
    Thanks again all, I think what I have now is pretty final, the 2 boxes will be switched if it dose not look right when it is printed. As for the steer in the center, I'm thinking that staying with the one with the grunge effects would be the best thing to do, this card is after all supposed to look older and distressed. And as for area on the card for jotting notes and such, the back will be very simple, it will be landscape with contact info along the bottom and a mailing address across the top of the card, so that leaves the whole middle section incase anyone would like to jot down something. But thank you all again. Graphic design is the profession I will be pursuing when I finish high school this June, and some positive yet critical feedback from people who know what they are talking about is both very educational and motivational to myself.

    thanks
     
  12. cgratti macrumors 6502a

    cgratti

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Location:
    Central Pennsylvania, USA
    #12
    I think the cow should be a little larger, maybe 10%.... other than that I like it
     
  13. bogman12 macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2007
    #13
    Okay, since I suggested the grundge on the cow, and I wasn't the one who provided a rather useless suggestion such as "Not enough variety in the size of things" Would you retract your statement?

    That qualifies you right there. I didn't say you had to have an art education to be a qualified critic. You must have a sense of what looks good, and provide sensible suggestions. Unlike.. "Oh I think you need more sizes in there." <- Yeah whatever the hell that meant..
     
  14. bogman12 macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2007
    #14
    Looks great! The grunged cow as I imagined would work pretty well with this design.
     
  15. perp macrumors newbie

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    Apr 2, 2008
    #15
    i second that.
     
  16. Nicolecat macrumors 6502a

    Nicolecat

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2008
    #16
    I agree...play a little with the layout of your rectangles and circle.

    Symmetry isn't always the best route.
    Try nudging the circle a little to the top or a little to the bottom.
    Also, play with the size of your rectangles.
    They don't have to be the same width as your circle.

    White space is an important factor as well...the words in the circle are crowding the circle's edge.
    You can allow some more "breathing room" to make it a little easier to read
    ...or try to type-set the words differently.

    Hope this helps.

    Play with it until it aesthetically (proportionate and tastefully) pleasing to you.
     
  17. Abraxsis macrumors 6502

    Abraxsis

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    Sep 23, 2003
    Location:
    Kentucky
    #17

    Yes, I hereby retract my statement. Just keep in mind that non-designers as well as students are running around here too. They might not have the brassy criticism skin some of us have gained from working in the field. I always try and keep that in mind when I post something so as not to offend them accidentally, and run them off.
     
  18. klymr macrumors 65816

    Joined:
    May 16, 2007
    Location:
    Utah
    #18
    Every single design class I've taken, whether it be for landscape architecture, drawing, 2D design, 3D design, or graphic design, or even what I do for a living, jewelry design, have ALL taught that if you want a composition (or design) to be more engaging then have a variety of things, one of which being the size of various elements. All the text the same size, the boxes the same size are BORING!

    And how about some visual examples from business cards:
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    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
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    [​IMG]

    Notice how in EVERY SINGLE ONE there is bigger text, smaller text, big image, etc. In the design by -kritter- the two boxes are the same size. The text was the same size. The line weights are the same. The only thing different was the circle in the middle, and the cow.

    I find it funny that someone wanders to the Design and Graphics forum and only posts in two threads, both about business card design, and then tries to tell me that I'm posting useless comments. What evidence do you have that my comments are not helpful in ANY way? I'd like to know.


    So, since I seem to be posting "useless comments," let's ask the graphic designers on here if I am blowing hot air, or if what I am saying is true, that a variety in size of elements makes it more interesting. What do you designers have to say about size and variety?
     
  19. Nicolecat macrumors 6502a

    Nicolecat

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2008
    #19
    No reason to get hot headed...
    Your input is simply that.
    (Whether or not you're in the design industry)
    ...Everyone can have great insight into something that someone else could've missed.

    Here's a screenshot of something I just thought of...
    with your grunge lines, it seems you put the text in boxes to make it more legible. You could try transparencies, and play with those a little as well.

    It's not a full out conceptual image...just basis for ideas.
    (The circle is just slightly 'off center' vertically)
    Your name would still be typeset above...
    and your sig (location) could go just below. (in a smaller sized font as suggested)
     

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  20. Saliwa macrumors member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2008
    #20
    Hi your business card looks like a really own wine bottle sticker. The examples that klymr has posted are very good, standards have changed over the years. ;)
     
  21. Abraxsis macrumors 6502

    Abraxsis

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    Sep 23, 2003
    Location:
    Kentucky
    #21
    Yes, they are all very good pieces, and all FROM designers FOR designers. If I hand you a card basically saying "I want to design you something" then the card is going to be the first place they look. If I hand you a card saying "I want to sell you some cows" something tells me the card graphics aren't the first place they look. I just can't see a farmer going, "Im not buying cows from THAT guy, did you see how lame his card was?" A business card isn't selling anything in this case, where as with a designer a memorable card is the first step to a working relationship. However, I do believe that a card that is a little out of ordinary is always a good thing, a cattle salesman giving out something design award worthy is probably not a good use of time/money. So in this case, I think the design that is being proposed is right on the money.

    Also, I wonder if that guy who totally ripped off the Beatles gives credit on his card?
     
  22. Abraxsis macrumors 6502

    Abraxsis

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2003
    Location:
    Kentucky
    #22
    Well I thought Id toss something in that Ive been working on as well, and see what everyone thought. Im going for ultra sparse with a slight splash of subdued color, but I think it just need "something" more, but I cant put my finger on it.

    *names and numbers have been changed to protect the not so innocent
     

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  23. AlexisV macrumors 68000

    AlexisV

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2007
    Location:
    Manchester, UK
    #23
    I assume you're trying to make a 'retro' card, indicating old fashioned values/quality etc?

    Problems - it's dull, the font's poor, the name/owner/location are all given equal weighting. And the cow looks like she's wearing trousers.

    It's hard to pull off a retro card - it has to be just so, otherwise it looks dated for all the wrong reasons.

    Animal's are a pain as well, and need to be spot on. The stiff, side-on view of the cow is dull.

    I think you need a different approach. I bet the ranch is pretty neat looking - all those views and big skies. How about a cracking photo of the ranch on side one (maybe not even feature the name of the place), and then all your details on side two in a decent serif font with nice clean typography. The logo doesn't have to be stunning, just a nice typeface perhaps, with 'Established 1976' or whatever to get that retro aspect?
     

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