Dateless? Try a picnic table

Discussion in 'Current Events' started by TheQuestion, Mar 28, 2008.

  1. TheQuestion macrumors regular

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    #1
    Warning...evidently there may be legal ramifications for fornicating with a picnic table (in certain spots). I love FoxNews.

    http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,343031,00.html

    Obviously sex with a piece of wood isn't the issue, but it makes a damn fine headline.
     
  2. Keebler macrumors 68030

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    #2
    geez. i've heard of women and bedposts, but a picnic table...

    my lord....
     
  3. Stampyhead macrumors 68020

    Stampyhead

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    #3
    I think it's significant that the police captain's last name is 'Johnson'... :rolleyes:
     
  4. Abstract macrumors Penryn

    Abstract

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  5. iJohnHenry macrumors P6

    iJohnHenry

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    #5
    Well, I guarantee it didn't say the ceiling needed painting??
     
  6. yg17 macrumors G5

    yg17

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    #6
    Ummm.....where on the table do you put it? And how do you avoid splinters? OUCH!
     
  7. iJohnHenry macrumors P6

    iJohnHenry

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    #7
    Read the links.

    Turn the table on it's side, and say hello to the umbrella hole.

    :eek:
     
  8. RaceTripper macrumors 68030

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    May 29, 2007
    #8
    Mysterious dried-up white stuff left on public picnic tables will never be the same again. :eek:
     
  9. TheQuestion thread starter macrumors regular

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    Location is relative, no?
    #9
    Yuck!!!! I did not need to think about that! :p
     
  10. Prof. macrumors 601

    Prof.

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    #10
    Picnic tables have a lot of holes:D:p
    It was a metal picnic table;)
     
  11. RedTomato macrumors 68040

    RedTomato

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    #11
    I suppose it's appropriate to say: "Get a room!"

    Tables have feelings too you know. Need to wine and dine them, and then go somewhere private. Mind the candles though, or it could get hotter than you expect.

    :eek: at the time of day he tried it on - 'always between 10.30am and noon'. Guess we know he has a taste for morning wood.
     
  12. Abstract macrumors Penryn

    Abstract

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    #12
    And some chairs while you're at it.....maybe some new curtains!
     
  13. yg17 macrumors G5

    yg17

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    #13
    AHhh, OK. I didn't read the article, I try to avoid Faux News :D
     

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