Finding a stalker

[Koodauw]

The bounce feature was removed in Lion, but you can add it back in. Do a goggle search for the instructions. I added it back.

About the FB being "comprimsed", how do we know it really was. There was someone else who posted with a similiar problem that FB was reporting they were logging in from an IP that was in another state. Couldn't it be that somehow facebook is reporting it incorrectly, or that the IP is assigned inaccuratly. I know IP address arent always a good indicator of where you are.

Perhaps the two events are unrelated. OP was anything done to the FB account such as posts that she didnt make?

 

[Shrink]

you're welcome



I'm not sure why they removed it but I googled before I answered Shrink and found that people were complaining on apple support forums about its removal. It's possible a future software update will bring it back but I have no idea.

I found an app on CNET that restores Bounce:

http://download.cnet.com/Restore-Bo...ns-Mail-app/3000-20429_4-75629050.html#rateit

One reviewer points out as was noted above - that spam will probably not end up back at the sender, but rather in some innocent person's mailbox. But you can get it back

 

[tktaylor1]

you guys live in NYC and this bothers you?

Your posts never cease to amaze me.

 

[MacNut]

Are you ever logging in from a 3G network? The phone companies have servers that bounce from different locations.

 

[acidfast7]

Image

Your posts never cease to amaze me.

it's an annoyance and not threatening. it's probably amateur hour (on his end) and he has some keylogger installed on one/all of her machines.

passwords should be changed and the machines should be wiped and reinstalled.

other than that, there's not much anyone can do. in fact any change in behavior (like this thread) is just letting the stalker win.

paranoid people could change house/car locks, cell phone and home numbers but beside that there's not much else to be done. in fact, i'd be quite hesitant to even employ the term "stalker" because supposed stalker could have a claim for deformation against the supposed "stalkee."

if anything happened in person, such as following/public meeting that's something different entirely, but that doesn't appear to be the case here.

file under annoying, but not dangerous.

 

[Scepticalscribe]

it's an annoyance and not threatening. it's probably amateur hour (on his end) and he has some keylogger installed on one/all of her machines.

passwords should be changed and the machines should be wiped and reinstalled.

other than that, there's not much anyone can do. in fact any change in behavior (like this thread) is just letting the stalker win.

paranoid people could change house/car locks, cell phone and home numbers but beside that there's not much else to be done. in fact, i'd be quite hesitant to even employ the term "stalker" because supposed stalker could have a claim for deformation against the supposed "stalkee."

if anything happened in person, such as following/public meeting that's something different entirely, but that doesn't appear to be the case here.

file under annoying, but not dangerous.

I beg to differ. The definition of 'stalking' includes unwanted, persistent attempts at communication with the person who has landed - for whatever reason - on the stalker's radar. It is much more than 'annoying'; it is nasty, obsessive and deeply disturbing, utterly invasive, and profoundly unsettling because it represents a total lack of respect for somebody else's personal, or private, space. Actually, yes, I would class it as threatening and disturbing behaviour.

Moreover, I'm in complete agreement with iJohnHenry on this; it is not a matter for levity.

 

[OutThere]

you guys live in NYC and this bothers you?

So if you live in New York you're supposed to be cool with people creepily messing with you? Is that part of the rental agreement on an apartment in the city? "1 bedroom in Bushwick, available February 15th, first and last month's rent plus $1500 security...and a sworn statement that you won't be bothered by late night phone calls where I breathe into the phone and ask what you're wearing."

 

[acidfast7]

I beg to differ. The definition of 'stalking' includes unwanted, persistent attempts at communication with the person who has landed - for whatever reason - on the stalker's radar. It is much more than 'annoying'; it is nasty, obsessive and deeply disturbing, utterly invasive, and profoundly unsettling because it represents a total lack of respect for somebody else's personal, or private, space. Actually, yes, I would class it as threatening and disturbing behaviour.

Moreover, I'm in complete agreement with iJohnHenry on this; it is not a matter for levity.

I agree with you, in definition.

However, because the stalkee has little/no control over the situation, other than what I mentioned, any time spent thinking about it is what the stalker wants. it's totally psychological for the stalker ...

so, why give them the satisfaction?

if the showed up in person, it's something different, but internet stalking isn't even worth the hassle. in fact, the stalker could be reading this thread and gaining satisfaction out of it.

so, why make a big deal out of it.

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So if you live in New York you're supposed to be cool with people creepily messing with you? Is that part of the rental agreement on an apartment in the city? "1 bedroom in Bushwick, available February 15th, first and last month's rent plus $1500 security...and a sworn statement that you won't be bothered by late night phone calls where I breathe into the phone and ask what you're wearing."

no, but it's got the highest concentration of distractions in the US. change the phone, passwords, and swipe the computers and be done with it. anything else is wasted time.

 

[msindt19]

The bounce feature was removed in Lion, but you can add it back in. Do a goggle search for the instructions. I added it back.

About the FB being "comprimsed", how do we know it really was. There was someone else who posted with a similiar problem that FB was reporting they were logging in from an IP that was in another state. Couldn't it be that somehow facebook is reporting it incorrectly, or that the IP is assigned inaccuratly. I know IP address arent always a good indicator of where you are.

Perhaps the two events are unrelated. OP was anything done to the FB account such as posts that she didnt make?

Excellent point Koodauw.

And acidfast I agree that the more time spent worrying about it is probably what the stalker intends but that doesn't change the fact that it is happening. Once you have an idea that somebody is following you or messing with you, it is only human nature to be looking over your shoulder. This "stalking/annoyance" has been going on for a year spanning phone calls telling her to have a great weekend when she was visiting her sister (which she never posted on FB) to extremely creepy e-mails and possible facebook hacking. I'm going to mention what Koodauw said and see if that makes her feel any better. And in response to the NYC post, she is from Squaw Valley CA with a population of less than 5,000 so yes these situations can be a bit jarring for somebody outside their element.

 

[acidfast7]

Excellent point Koodauw.

And acidfast I agree that the more time spent worrying about it is probably what the stalker intends but that doesn't change the fact that it is happening. Once you have an idea that somebody is following you or messing with you, it is only human nature to be looking over your shoulder. This "stalking/annoyance" has been going on for a year spanning phone calls telling her to have a great weekend when she was visiting her sister (which she never posted on FB) to extremely creepy e-mails and possible facebook hacking. I'm going to mention what Koodauw said and see if that makes her feel any better. And in response to the NYC post, she is from Squaw Valley CA with a population of less than 5,000 so yes these situations can be a bit jarring for somebody outside their element.

it's a keylogger. just wipe the machines. i've seen this in person before, the exact situation you describe, and after wiping the machines and changing numbers/passwords all was better. there was one personal altercation (stalker/stalkee lived in the same town), an arrest, an expulsion (evidence that the stalker was logging into someone elses account at the student computer lab and then it ended with a restraining order.

start easy and wipe everything clean (PCs/phones/tables/change numbers) and it will be much better.

also, there were family communications prior to SMS/MMS/FB/MySpace

 

[ericrwalker]

probably a jealous ex. She wasn't dating someone else when she started dating you was she?

 

[Rampant.A.I.]

That was a couple of weeks ago, today she logged into facebook and I guess there is a way to track where you have been logging in from, and it is showing that she logged into her account from Lake Mary, FL...odd thing is we live in NYC. I haven't looked into any of this since I'm at work but she said she was able to obtain the IP address and figure out he is doing it from an iPhone. My question is, is it possible to contact Apple and have them trace the iPhone to the IP address? I'm hoping he is doing it from his home network so that the IP would remain the same....Or am i completely off base and the iPhone is given a new IP every time it logs into the same/different networks?

Thanks

I don't know if Apple will get involved, but contact Facebook. They take site security seriously, and I've helped a friend retrieve her account after she got phished and some idiot tried to randsom her FB account for her YouTube account. (Long story, I know it's bizarre.)

Take screenshots of every message she gets from him, or any changes he makes to her FB page. Turn those directly into FB, and if it continues, go back to the police with any info you may have gathered.

You may also want to contact Google. They were surprisingly helpful in my friend's case.