I can still remember when I couldn't WAIT to get my hands on the latest Apple tech - man… perpetually green with it. And now I just think it's... stupid? If it were free, I'd pay to opt out. And because people actually pay a premium for it, I'm increasingly worried that - if I stick with buying Apple - I'll no longer be able to escape the idiocy? Anyway, here goes my list of Apple's goofiest new tech: Face ID Uhm... why? If you're already busy with your hands, then how exactly are you craning your neck so that the phone can ID your face? And, beyond that for tech’s sake feature, wouldn't animating emojis get old pretty much instantly? Yeah, I get how it might be useful in some scientific lab setting to study faces - but I really can't get over how idiotic... I actually feel sorry for anyone who spent a grand on an iPhone X for that feature. What, are they DJ-ing, both hands busy spinning records, and their phone just locks them out? And mainly I'm just sad that Apple is no doubt hard at work, investing infinite resources to top the stupidity that is Face ID. How much money was wasted on that? AirPods Okay, there are tons of reasons why these would be awesome. My problem is that I'd likely lose them - pretty much constantly. The only reason I can hope to find my earbuds is because they're forever attached to the foot long cable leading to the jack. So they're not idiotic at all - I'd just need at least two pair, so I'd have access to the ones in their case - ugh... I'd probably misplace that, too. So admittedly I'm the idiot, and only dislike the concept because they seem way too expensive to constantly be losing… all the time. So - seriously - how do folks keep up with them? Do you always remember to put them back in the case and place the case where you can find it? I'd most definitely have to break my lifelong habit of tossing my earphones on the bed next to me when I'm done, right? Touch Bar Hey, maybe it's really cool? I hardly use the top row - the occasional exceptions being the escape key, the power button, and the play/pause key. And, as a touch-typist, I almost always look at the keyboard to peck those out. So I guess I'm unfairly including it in my list? Just jelly it’s not on my machine… But I am interested in how useful people are finding it? Anyway, hopefully people can add stupid stuff to the list that I haven’t picked up on? And no fair adding me - that’s an automatic.