I believe he is talking about hold for Pick up at UPS or FEDEX Office. All of my orders from Apple comes through FEDEX and I always do a hold for pick up at Fedex office as I hate expansive items being delivered to my house and especially if they leave it if no one is home. I've had no issues with requesting a hold for pick up for launch day items as well. I will be doing the same with the 8 Plus.
Once I get the tracking, after 9 pm on Thursday, I will request a hold for pick up and will pick it up the next day.
OP, you can request a hold for pick up. FEDEX asks for your valid ID with the matching address, so if it's in your wife's name, I don't know if they will release the package.
I know for UPS, you can pick up a package for someone else. I have UPS My Choice and I have set for all orders that my wife and I order automatically gets redirected to our local UPS store for any package that qualifies to be redirected. I have no issues of going to the UPS store and picking up my wife's packages. I sometimes take her ID and show both mine and hers proving we live together.
Hope this helps.