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how do you cope with losing someone you love?

It's always difficult doing without something or someone that you have been associated with for so long - not to mention quite attached to. I'm sorry you're going through this..

I would suggest getting more involved in helping other people: Community projects, volunteering, etc. Getting your mind on something else makes the time go by quicker and will ease the pain moderately.

Also take up a sport or physically-involved hobby; running, Kung fu, whatever. Working towards goals will help you keep your feelings and thoughts in focus.

Depression, they say, is anger turned inward. Don't start isolating yourself and getting introverted. Be out and about as much as possible. You have to take time for yourself, naturally, but don't go avoiding other people.

Keep your chin up :)
 
Melrose said:
I would suggest getting more involved in helping other people: Community projects, volunteering, etc.
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.....and beautiful women. The best way to get over a woman is to pick yourself off the ground, get back on the saddle, and ride ride ride.

Also take up a sport or physically-involved hobby; running, Kung fu, whatever.

Keep your chin up :)
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Good advice for running and kung-fu.
 
bassproguy07 said:
I was raised a strong christian, My mother is a methodist pastor and I have always been the type to trust God in stuff like this. I pray every night for God to either end the relationship or let us both have the same feelings. I know God has his own way in working with things, and I know we might drift apart now and one day be together but I honestly dont think I am emotionally stable to deal with not being with her.
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I think that, regardless of your creed, solving your own problems is the most reasonable thing to do. Relying on someone to fix stuff for you is not entirely realistic. If prayer is in fact effective (a belief which I do not share), then I'd say that action is the most effective form of prayer. God helps those who help themselves, right? Don't wait for things to get better on their own, do what you think is necessary for you to feel better. Getting out of a difficult situation requires a lot of work and effort. The more you do for yourself, the better you'll feel.
 
loss of a girlfriend

bassproguy07 said:
Im not talking death here so keep those comments out, I'm talking about losing a girlfriend/boyfriend that you love more than anything. Me and my gf have been together off and on for 3 years, and shes the love of my life. We recently broke up over some stupid crap, and she tells me she still loves me but she doesnt want to be tied up. Shes not sleeping around or dating someone else, shes not like that at all, but it seems we are drifting apart. She has stayed home this semester for family reasons, but she is wanting to go to a school next semester far far away. I honestly don't know what I would do without her in my life, we live in somewhat of a small town, and everything I see reminds me of us. Being broken up has been really hard on the both of us, but probably harder on me.
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My friend, I empathize with you. I'm in a similar boat in that my girlfriend broke with me after 1.5 years 2 months ago. I'm in more pain now than ever.
I even saw her picture on POF a month after she left me for stupid stuff. Telling me that she wanted to be free although that morning we woke up together with our normal i love you's. She was spending less and less time with me on "our" weekends when her kids were at there father's. She would do chores and play softball and tie herself up with other stuff that did not involved US. I menmtioned that to her that night and she broke up.
Like you, she is the love of my life. I'm 47. I've had a number of long term relationships to know the difference. I know your pain. I cry more now than ever. I'm not going to kill myself. But I wish I was dead. The pain is immense.
I cant go back. This is her second breakup with me. I asked her back and that lasted 7 months.
Pride is no longer the issue. I know I'm not wanted. Your girlfriend are drifting apart slowly. She has not cut you off completely.
My only advice is to try and stay focused on your life. You sound much younger than me.
The pain of relationships never gets easier with age because older people internalize so much.
You can date casually. No sex. Make platonic friends with women.
If your girlfriend loves you and sees you moving on, sometimes they have a change of heart. Don't chase her. Women don't like that begging stuff. They look down on that.
I saw a Dr and got on some anti anxiety drugs to keep me calm. It helped.
It was a crutch until I could do it myself.
By all means CRY if you need to. Get it out. Don't let your friends tell to to man up or get laid because that's crap.
I l
know your pain. My pain is immense after 2 months. But I'm going to make it.
I'll meet someone else one day and maybe they will erase her memory maybe not.
You loved my friend. You let yourself love. Be proud. That's why you hurt.
You're not some hardcore ******* keeping his feelings in a safe inside your heart just to prove you're a man. A real man shows love to his woman.
Know you are not alone.
Take care
Vito
 
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