How do You Tell Someone Nicely Not To Drink?

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by Beyond Broken, Feb 4, 2009.

  1. Beyond Broken macrumors newbie

    Jan 15, 2009
    I am working on getting my ex-girlfriend back. So far so good. But since we've been apart, she has taking on the new habit of Drinking Vodka. She drinks almost every night. And she drinks to get drunk.
    I want to come up with creative ways of distracting her from this without upsetting her... All I can come up with is "Let's not Drink tonight, I like you better sober". Not even sure if that sounds good now that I typed it...
    Any advice?
  2. Sun Baked macrumors G5

    Sun Baked

    May 19, 2002
    She may be at the tipping point of going from night drunks to complete always wasted lush ...

    If you cannot yank her back, might be a tough future.
  3. 0098386 Suspended


    Jan 18, 2005
    If she's drinking just to get drunk every night then there's probably some problem that has developed since you were last together.
    As with anyone like that they need to want to sort this problem for themselves first, admit they have a problem and all that.
  4. Thomas Veil macrumors 68020

    Thomas Veil

    Feb 14, 2004
    OBJECTIVE reality
    Ditto the above.

    If you have to "distract" her and she gets upset about it, that right there tells you you're facing a serious problem.

    I can easily see an intervention in her future.
  5. Abstract macrumors Penryn


    Dec 27, 2002
    Location Location Location
    Try to keep her busy until she's really tired, and see if she says she has an urge to drink. If she does have this craving, then perhaps you need to either tell her that it makes you uncomfortable, or don't try to get back together with her.
  6. ski2moro macrumors 6502

    May 3, 2007
  7. iBlue macrumors Core


    Mar 17, 2005
    London, England
    If your past threads are any indication, maybe she is drinking because she's got a slightly obsessive and possibly controlling ex on her tail. Sounds to me like you are pursuing a relationship which is Beyond Broken.
  8. Zombie Acorn macrumors 65816

    Zombie Acorn

    Feb 2, 2009
    Toronto, Ontario
  9. steviem macrumors 68020


    May 26, 2006
    New York, Baby!
    Make an Intervention banner a la 'How I met your Mother'..
  10. 0098386 Suspended


    Jan 18, 2005
    Well it's their decision but thankfully we live in a society that likes to say when it gets too much. So other peoples problems don't spiral out of control.

    I didn't know it was that OP, cheers for pointing it out :)
  11. Keebler macrumors 68030

    Jun 20, 2005

    I think BB needs to realize that sometimes you gain back what you let go.
    if it's meant to be, it's meant to be.

    In the meantime, let her go.

    it hurts, but it sounds like that's what you need to do.
  12. DiamondMac macrumors 68040


    Aug 11, 2006
    Washington, D.C.
    No matter how you do it, expect her to get angry or annoyed but realize that she will probably be nicer the next day when she sleeps on it

    I have told a friend this and he didn't take it well until 2 days later when he thanked us
  13. eldy macrumors 6502

    Jan 30, 2009
    The City
    Wean her off with some Rohypnol Light.
  14. Abstract macrumors Penryn


    Dec 27, 2002
    Location Location Location
  15. shfreelance macrumors 6502a

    May 24, 2008
    Eustis, FL
    Wow, lol it just keeps going back...
  16. mgguy macrumors 6502


    Dec 26, 2006
    Telling or asking someone not to drink seldom has much of a long term impact on their drinking behavior. It can even screw up your relationship when they start choosing the bottle over you, which may not be a bad thing depending upon how bad your relationship already is. And trying to distract them by going out to settings where alcohol isn't available (e.g., the movies) will get a bit tiring on you after awhile, as you are constantly trying to orchestrate and control things and feel like it is your responsibility to keep her away from alcohol. I say just show a lot of love and support and let her take whatever course she is intent on taking. Ultimately, involvement in a proven-effective group like AA to get her sobriety may be an option she may wish to take.
  17. mogzieee macrumors 6502a

    Feb 8, 2008
    London, UK
    If she gets too drunk, get her Vodka bottle, fill it with water, and see if she notices.

    Old trick, but funny when they actually believe it's Vodka. lol.
  18. MistaBungle macrumors 6502a


    Apr 3, 2005
    OP, you just got owned.
  19. northy124 macrumors 68020


    Nov 18, 2007
    From past threads I have to say it is you that is driving her (it would sure drive me to drink:eek:), just leave her alone and she may come back. I'm surprised she hasn't got a court order out on you:rolleyes:

    If that sounded harsh I am sorry:eek:
  20. iJohnHenry macrumors P6


    Mar 22, 2008
    On tenterhooks
    I agree.

    If you really have her best interests at heart, and not your own, leave her be.
  21. trule macrumors 6502

    Mar 16, 2007
    Tell her that if she wants to drink then you don't want to see her anymore. If she stops then *perhaps* she likes you...but I get the feeling you're the problem in all of this and perhaps you should wise up and leave her alone :(

    Out of old is she, and how old are you?

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