How do You Tell Someone Nicely Not To Drink?

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by Beyond Broken, Feb 4, 2009.

  1. Beyond Broken macrumors newbie

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2009
    #1
    I am working on getting my ex-girlfriend back. So far so good. But since we've been apart, she has taking on the new habit of Drinking Vodka. She drinks almost every night. And she drinks to get drunk.
    I want to come up with creative ways of distracting her from this without upsetting her... All I can come up with is "Let's not Drink tonight, I like you better sober". Not even sure if that sounds good now that I typed it...
    Any advice?
    Thanks
     
  2. Sun Baked macrumors G5

    Sun Baked

    Joined:
    May 19, 2002
    #2
    She may be at the tipping point of going from night drunks to complete always wasted lush ...

    If you cannot yank her back, might be a tough future.
     
  3. Dagless macrumors Core

    Dagless

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    #3
    If she's drinking just to get drunk every night then there's probably some problem that has developed since you were last together.
    As with anyone like that they need to want to sort this problem for themselves first, admit they have a problem and all that.
     
  4. Thomas Veil macrumors 68020

    Thomas Veil

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    #4
    Ditto the above.

    If you have to "distract" her and she gets upset about it, that right there tells you you're facing a serious problem.

    I can easily see an intervention in her future.
     
  5. Abstract macrumors Penryn

    Abstract

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    #5
    Try to keep her busy until she's really tired, and see if she says she has an urge to drink. If she does have this craving, then perhaps you need to either tell her that it makes you uncomfortable, or don't try to get back together with her.
     
  6. ski2moro macrumors 6502

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  7. iBlue macrumors Core

    iBlue

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    London, England
    #8
    If your past threads are any indication, maybe she is drinking because she's got a slightly obsessive and possibly controlling ex on her tail. Sounds to me like you are pursuing a relationship which is Beyond Broken.
     
  8. Zombie Acorn macrumors 65816

    Zombie Acorn

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  9. steviem macrumors 68020

    steviem

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    #10
    Make an Intervention banner a la 'How I met your Mother'..
     
  10. Dagless macrumors Core

    Dagless

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    #11
    Well it's their decision but thankfully we live in a society that likes to say when it gets too much. So other peoples problems don't spiral out of control.

    I didn't know it was that OP, cheers for pointing it out :)
     
  11. Keebler macrumors 68030

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2005
    Location:
    Canada
    #12
    +1

    I think BB needs to realize that sometimes you gain back what you let go.
    if it's meant to be, it's meant to be.

    In the meantime, let her go.

    it hurts, but it sounds like that's what you need to do.
     
  12. DiamondMac macrumors 68040

    DiamondMac

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    Aug 11, 2006
    Location:
    Washington, D.C.
    #13
    No matter how you do it, expect her to get angry or annoyed but realize that she will probably be nicer the next day when she sleeps on it

    I have told a friend this and he didn't take it well until 2 days later when he thanked us
     
  13. eldy macrumors 6502

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    The City
    #14
    Wean her off with some Rohypnol Light.
     
  14. Abstract macrumors Penryn

    Abstract

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  15. shfreelance macrumors 6502a

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    Eustis, FL
    #16
    Wow, lol it just keeps going back...
     
  16. mgguy macrumors 6502

    mgguy

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    Dec 26, 2006
    #17
    Telling or asking someone not to drink seldom has much of a long term impact on their drinking behavior. It can even screw up your relationship when they start choosing the bottle over you, which may not be a bad thing depending upon how bad your relationship already is. And trying to distract them by going out to settings where alcohol isn't available (e.g., the movies) will get a bit tiring on you after awhile, as you are constantly trying to orchestrate and control things and feel like it is your responsibility to keep her away from alcohol. I say just show a lot of love and support and let her take whatever course she is intent on taking. Ultimately, involvement in a proven-effective group like AA to get her sobriety may be an option she may wish to take.
     
  17. mogzieee macrumors 6502a

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    Feb 8, 2008
    Location:
    London, UK
    #18
    If she gets too drunk, get her Vodka bottle, fill it with water, and see if she notices.

    Old trick, but funny when they actually believe it's Vodka. lol.
     
  18. MistaBungle macrumors 6502a

    MistaBungle

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    #19
    OP, you just got owned.
     
  19. northy124 macrumors 68020

    northy124

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    Nov 18, 2007
    #20
    From past threads I have to say it is you that is driving her (it would sure drive me to drink:eek:), just leave her alone and she may come back. I'm surprised she hasn't got a court order out on you:rolleyes:

    If that sounded harsh I am sorry:eek:
     
  20. iJohnHenry macrumors P6

    iJohnHenry

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    #21
    I agree.

    If you really have her best interests at heart, and not your own, leave her be.
     
  21. trule macrumors 6502

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2007
    #22
    Tell her that if she wants to drink then you don't want to see her anymore. If she stops then *perhaps* she likes you...but I get the feeling you're the problem in all of this and perhaps you should wise up and leave her alone :(

    Out of interest...how old is she, and how old are you?
     

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