I recently discovered something, kinda by accident.
I have File Vault on. I have thunderbolt 3 cable from MM to eGPU, I have my eGPU going to DP on my Dell (DP). I also have a HDMI 2.0 cable from the MM to the Dell(HDMI 1). I was always viewing the monitor on DP not HDMI. The HDMI was just to use for a restart but I usually forgot to switch it on the monitor.
Previously if I had my monitor set to DP and restarted, I would fail the blind restart, it always ended up force shutdown, switch to HDMi 1 then restart.
I have all my apps that I want using the eGPU set as preferred in Get Info on the Applications.
I now have my monitor set to HDMI 1, the mac mini HDMI to Dell. I find my game runs fine. I tested Compute several times in GeekBench 5 and its as fast as the scores I was getting, just over 50,000. It looks the same.
When I restart now I see the screen and after password everything fires up normal. I have no need to shut things off like the eGPU or unplug cables or force hard restart.
I have 80% of my apps Prefer External GPU.
It seems to be working like an Apple again
edit: I should note I am mirroring the display DP & HDMi 1