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"If I Ruled The World..."

oh come on... i can't believe nobody's said this yet!!

"If i were the king of the world, I'll tell you i'd do... I'd throw away the cars and the bars and the war, and make sweet love to you. Joy to the world, all the boys and girl, joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea, joy to you and me..."


I'd know exactly when Apple would be releasing new products... like the powerbook g5 that's gonna be coming out next tuesday?

But in reality, one of my rules would be to enforce cruel and unusual punishment. I would make it a law that if committed of murder, that they would have their arms and legs amputated. One would think twice about committing a crime if they knew that they weren't going to have arms or legs... and just be a blob of person.

Everybody would be one religion, sorry, but religion is the major cause of war.

Getting a driver's license would be more difficult, and one would have to retest once they hit a certain age...

People under a certain IQ shouldn't be allowed to reproduce (we don't need them in our gene pool).
 
mgargan1 said:
But in reality, one of my rules would be to enforce cruel and unusual punishment. I would make it a law that if committed of murder, that they would have their arms and legs amputated. One would think twice about committing a crime if they knew that they weren't going to have arms or legs... and just be a blob of person.

Everybody would be one religion, sorry, but religion is the major cause of war.

Getting a driver's license would be more difficult, and one would have to retest once they hit a certain age...

People under a certain IQ shouldn't be allowed to reproduce (we don't need them in our gene pool).
Click to expand...
Jesus wept.
 
mgargan1 said:
People under a certain IQ shouldn't be allowed to reproduce (we don't need them in our gene pool).
Click to expand...

Could you just clarify a couple of points for me?

What would the IQ cut off point be?

How will you stop the reproduction?

It's always important to work through the practical details.
 
calculus said:
Could you just clarify a couple of points for me?

What would the IQ cut off point be?

How will you stop the reproduction?

It's always important to work through the practical details.
Click to expand...

You know, I started to respond... but i realized I'm going to offend someone. So just ignore my post...

Jaffa Cake said:
It certainly would be if you're lopping off people's limbs left right and centre.
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Well, eventually I'd like to get to the point where people are too afraid to commit crimes...
 
Sun Baked said:
Don't worry we tie you up and throw iPods at you until you die (in the techno equivalent of stoning) before long anyhow.

Especially since any petty tyrant should suffer "death by iPod."
Click to expand...


But I wouldn't be a petty tyrant. I'd be the fully-fledged, card-carrying kind of tyrant that bans iPods.

No death by iPod for me!

<Evil laugh>

:D
 
devilot said:
View attachment 68809 "...imagine that imagine that..." View attachment 68809


:eek: So I'm the only one who read the thread title and heard that song? :eek:
Click to expand...

Actually, Koodauw beat you to it. Besides, the thread title was no accident. ;)

Koodauw said:
I'd free all my sons...
Click to expand...

dllavaneras said:
I'd get someone else to take the job. I'm not that crazy
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Ah yes, but then think about it this way: What if the person who took this job from you made some horrible decisions that devastated millions of lives? If you took the job, you'd make sure the bad things didn't happen.......or so you'd tell yourself. That's kind of the point.
 
mgargan1 said:
Well, eventually I'd like to get to the point where people are too afraid to commit crimes...
Click to expand...
What a sad but somehow touching faith you have in the criminal justice system. You do realise that what you are proposing combines the very worst elements of theocracy and fascism, don't you?

mgargan1 said:
Who's to say that Christianity isn't the religion i would choose.
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He would weep all the more to know he had your support.
 
I think I'd make a great God.

The problem with the world is that on the whole it's run by unskilled labour. I'd change that. I'm also an excellent delegator and have experience of large-scale project management.

CV on request. Time-wasters will be struck by lightning.
 
Let's see . . .
-eliminate death penalty
-revamp parole system and "life sentences"
-less military spending
-no state funding or tax breaks for religion
-make university part of the public school system
-health care for all
-revamp tax brackets, make the tax rate curve more parabolic, with lower starting bracket and gradually increasing until the tax rates increased at a higher rate for brackets above one million, with an income tax cap at 40%
-gradually eliminate the deficit
-people could live wherever they choose
-allow gay marriage, stem cell research, and abortions
 
skunk said:
What a sad but somehow touching faith you have in the criminal justice system. You do realise that what you are proposing combines the very worst elements of theocracy and fascism, don't you?

He would weep all the more to know he had your support.
Click to expand...

ouch...

skunk said:
What a sad but somehow touching faith you have in the criminal justice system. You do realise that what you are proposing combines the very worst elements of theocracy and fascism, don't you?

He would weep all the more to know he had your support.
Click to expand...

I don't plan to have religion rule peoples' lives. Infact, in a perfect world, it would be a completely personal part of life... but it's not, and that's one of the reasons why we have war.
 
welshandrew said:
But I wouldn't be a petty tyrant. I'd be the fully-fledged, card-carrying kind of tyrant that bans iPods.

No death by iPod for me!

<Evil laugh>

:D
Click to expand...

I guess we could suck up to your ego and kill you using all the unwanted Zune players.
 
The simple things

1. Radio stations would be banned from airing any commercials or spots in which the sounds of car horns, sirens, or car crashes are present. How many of us have nearly gotten into accidents trying to avoid the crash on the radio or to find the ambulance on the radio?

2. Punitive Damages would not go to the plaintiff or the lawyers. Why should they? That's what the actual damages are for. They would go into one of a few funds based on the general nature of the case. For example, a universal healthcare fund for cases involving health issues and an environmental protection fund for cases involving pollution, etc.

3. Income tax would be the only tax. Of course, it would be higher than it is now.

4. The word "marriage" would be removed from all states' laws, as marriage is a religious sacrament and can only be defined by individual religious organizations. Civil Unions would be defined as the union of two consenting adults who agree to commit to x, y, and z.

5. Cars would be required to tell you when your headlights are out.

6. All number pads would use the Apple format (wide zero key, tall enter key, multiplication symbol in the corner). While we're at it, all keyboards will use the Apple format - as they seem to be the only ones to realize that you can't name two keys "Enter" if they perform different functions.

7. All mice would have one button and a scroll ball.

8. At least 10 percent of children could be left behind.

;)
 
jsalzer said:
6. All number pads would use the Apple format (wide zero key, tall enter key, multiplication symbol in the corner). While we're at it, all keyboards will use the Apple format - as they seem to be the only ones to realize that you can't name two keys "Enter" if they perform different functions.
Click to expand...
You might want to test the Delete keys on your Apple keyboard to see if they perform the same function. ;)
 
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