Is My Ex Partner Watching Me?

Discussion in 'iPhone Tips, Help and Troubleshooting' started by JAE17, Sep 11, 2017.

  1. JAE17 macrumors newbie

    Sep 11, 2017

    I am really hoping you can help.

    My partner and I have separated, but we have two children so at weekends he does come and go from my house. He is very angry and possessive and I am scared that he has somehow tapped my iPhone.

    Is it possible that he has been receiving or viewing my texts and emails? And is it possible that he can track my location?

    I have heard that these things are possible, a friend of mine had her location tracked through her iPhone to her husband's computer; and another friend had lots of bugs on her phone and when she took it to the shop they said some software had been installed to forward texts and calls...! I have noticed that the weather on my phone has started registering as in London, but he lives there and I do not.

    I'd really appreciate your help, as you might imagine I am feeling quite violated and unsafe by the thought.

    Thank you
  2. Outlaw13 macrumors newbie

    Oct 23, 2013
    It is possible but without knowing what's on your phone it's hard to say. As a minimum I would change your email and Apple ID passwords.
  3. KGB7 Suspended


    Jun 15, 2017
    Rockville, MD
    Change all your passwords.
    Got to Apple Store and ask a tech to check your phone for malicious software.
    If software found, get a written report and give it to your attorney.
  4. JAE17 thread starter macrumors newbie

    Sep 11, 2017
    Good idea, thank you to both of you.

    And do I need to disable in settings any programs like "locate my iPhone" or something like that? Are there any legitimate programs that might be feeding information to another computer that I should be aware of? Any cloud syncs?
  5. KGB7 Suspended


    Jun 15, 2017
    Rockville, MD
    Just change the passwords; iTunes, emails, iCloud etc
    Add 2step verification as well. Apple peeps at the store will guide you through it.
  6. KeepCalmPeople macrumors 65816


    Sep 5, 2012
    San Francisco Bay Area, California
    Check 'Find My Friends' if you have the app, and make sure you are not sharing your location with him.
  7. sbuntin macrumors regular


    Aug 2, 2011
    Portland OR

    also check in Messages (in a conversation with him, click on "Details" or the I for information icon in the top right corner. If the details page has "stop sharing my location", cluck "stop sharing my location. If it has "share my location with hisname", you're not sharing it.

    Also, log in to and make sure no other devices besides yours are listed as trusted devices. there should also be no other phone numbers besides yours.

    If your phone service is still somehow being billed to him, take over the account or get a new phone number if necessary.

    change all of your email passwords, social media passwords, google/gmail/youtube passwords. make sure you are not sharing your location via these services.

    As for checking the phone for malware, there are a number of legitimate apps designed to be used for parents to track kids, etc. It is entirely possible that the store personnel will not notice these. Go through each and every app on your device. If you cannot articulate a reason for it to be there, remove it.

    Please note that in this case, NO ONE other than you should have access to any of your accounts or passwords, because social engineering is a thing.

    two more things: Don;t forget to change your secret questions / answers for those accounts that have them. Do not use questions for which tour ex can find the answer. If necessary, choose random questions from the ones offered,, and make up answers which are not logical. Then WRITE DOWN THE Q and A in an organized little black book. Maybe keep a copy in a safe deposit box.

    When you change your passwords, do not make them short and easy to remember, especially anything tied to kids, birthdays, pets, etc. Long and memorable, but nonsensical, is probably best. camboatia@aunteater=starvedspiders might be an example.

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6 September 11, 2017