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Just got home from the worst date ever...
- Thread starter maestro55
- Start date
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Just to clarify, we had talked about where we were going to go out to before we did. I mentioned The Clay Pot, she said she had never been and would be interested in trying it. As for the Starbucks Coffee, when we left we were driving around and I asked her if she liked coffee, she said yes and so I asked her if she wanted to go grab a coffee at Starbucks, she said sure. It wasn't like I dragged her out of her house and was rude by choosing two places that you wouldn't choose for a date. And the conversation never once mentioned radio or linux actually, was mostly telling her about myself and trying to get her to talk about herself more. I was courteous and like I said before I tried to get her to talk about her interests and her life, I am not some jerk who controls the conversation.
You make a good point, and perhaps when I eventually move to Austin I will meet that nice liberal woman who is interested in some of the same things as I. Actually I am good friends with a lady who is into Linux and Amatuer Radio aswell as science and technology, etc; however, she lives in Maryland.
She did very little talking? Maybe she found you too talkative, and you didn't really give her a chance to speak. 
You should have asked her questions, and have her talk about herself all night.
Girls aren't whack. Just because you take a girl on a date, doesn't mean it'll work out. Were you looking for a guaranteed good time, where she would definitely like you, and you would definitely like her? It doesn't work like that. And besides, would you want to go out with this girl again anyway? Who cares about her. It wasn't good, and this "test" failed.
Dating is like going to a job interview, but with a greater potential for sex.
You should have asked her questions, and have her talk about herself all night.
Girls aren't whack. Just because you take a girl on a date, doesn't mean it'll work out. Were you looking for a guaranteed good time, where she would definitely like you, and you would definitely like her? It doesn't work like that. And besides, would you want to go out with this girl again anyway? Who cares about her. It wasn't good, and this "test" failed.
Dating is like going to a job interview, but with a greater potential for sex.
She did very little talking? Maybe she found you too talkative, and you didn't really give her a chance to speak.
You should have asked her questions, and have her talk about herself all night.
Girls aren't whack. Just because you take a girl on a date, doesn't mean it'll work out. Were you looking for a guaranteed good time, where she would definitely like you, and you would definitely like her? It doesn't work like that. And besides, would you want to go out with this girl again anyway? Who cares about her. It wasn't good, and this "test" failed.
Dating is like going to a job interview, but with a greater potential for sex.
I guess that depends on where you're interviewing at.
Well if I was going to work at Hooters (um, somehow....), I'd almost expect something more than just their chicken wings.
Remember, you have to like her, it is just as important as her liking you. How can you be really in to a girl that won't have a conversation with you? There's also about 3 billion women in this world and you're looking for one. There's bound to be some dates that don't go well.
I asked her various questions in order to attempt to get her to talk about herself; however, she wasn't talkative, like I said she seemed very mellow.
You are right, and I guess in the end when I think about it I didn't really like her. I want someone who is articulate and seems half way capable of carrying on a conversation. I want someone who doesn't think I am naive and tell me some BS story that she has a fricking curfew while she is getting phone calls all night long.
My guess is that she was just trying to be nice on a first date. What would you rather she do? Blast you to bits the first time she meets you?
Just looking over your first blog entry, I see that
- you're an angry drunk
- have a chip on your shoulder about religion
- you're bitter and depressed
- you are a "über-nerd"
- you're "too lazy" to catch up your school work
- you've surfed so much internet porn, you're bored of it
- you don't respect women ("I want to meet a chick who enjoys f***ing me")
Just how many women find the above qualities attractive?
How can you lack the looks when you describe yourself as "The Sexy Maestro" and can say things like "while I have to admit her face isn’t all that great her body is very nice."
Seriously though, looks like you have some maturing to do. It's unfair to say you were on the "worst date ever" when it sounds like you're at least partly to blame. I mean, how self-centered is it to claim this when it sounds like you bored her into making excuses to get out of a bad date. Instead of blaming your troubles at everyone else and shaking your fist at the heavens, use this as a learning experience. And yeah, it may take years to find someone and maybe you never do, but you'll improve your chances if you try to be a better, more respectful person.
You sound like you have your head on straight. Just a bum date, perhaps she only wanted to go out to get over someone else. Sucks for you because how are you to know that until it's too late?!
Blows. I can't imagine dating in Waco. I grew up in San Antonio, lived in Dallas for awhile too. Texas is all restaurants and nightclubs for dating. Gets boring and repetitive.
Keep swinging, slugger!
Recommendation: Don't write blog entries while drunk. It seems not to be doing you well.
But best of luck. Don't try so hard or worry so hard about it. You'll find someone eventually, but looking too hard probably won't hasten the process; it'll just make it seem longer. Keep yourself busy with things you enjoy because if you can't be relatively happy without a girl, you're not going to be ecstatically happy with one.
But best of luck. Don't try so hard or worry so hard about it. You'll find someone eventually, but looking too hard probably won't hasten the process; it'll just make it seem longer. Keep yourself busy with things you enjoy because if you can't be relatively happy without a girl, you're not going to be ecstatically happy with one.
If she wasn't happy, than yes I would want her to tell me. Then I might also add that earlier today she sent me a message telling me she had a good time last night, she obviously didn't so why message me and tell me this out of the blue?
Angry drunk? Not really but that evening wasn't my normal evening. I do have a chip on my shoulder about religion but that is for the PRSI forum and has nothing to do with me going out with the girl last night who was an Atheist and in talking to her prior to meeting her I discovered she agreed with me on the topic. I am probably a great deal bitter and at times can get depressed. In February I was stressed out about a lot of different things and the being lonely part only amplified that. I am most certainly a nerd, very much to the extreme hence the classification of "über-nerd". I have been lazy in the past with my education, but I am finishing my degree in August and I still have like a 3.4GPA so I am not doing too poorly. I am indeed bored with internet porn, but oh well.
As for the not respecting women. Let me please clarify for you that my word choice "I want to meet a chick who enjoys f***ing me" isn't reflective of my actual opinions towards women. In fact I respect women a great deal. I think all guys want to meet a woman who he can have a strong sexual relationship with, one in which the woman is fully satisfied and enjoys what goes on in the bedroom. So my wording was very wrong, and I could easily delete that thread and like I never posted drunk but that is a reminder to me not to do so.
Well "The Sexy Maestro" is what I titled my original blog back in 2004 and was a joke on the Seinfeld episode titled "The Maestro" in which I began referring to myself as "The Sexy Maestro" (instead of "The Maestro" as was in that episode of Seinfeld). It was a joke among friends of mine and it has stuck around. And I didn't say that I didn't believe I was attractive, I said that this particular girl and others that I have met and dated perhaps haven't found me to be attractive but I live by the old "beauty is in the eye of the beholder". The girl in question in that drunk post wasn't a girl that I am actually attracted to and again my word choice isn't reflective of my own thoughts on physical attraction I do believe that there has to be some physical attraction between a couple. I wouldn't date someone I wasn't physically attracted to and I wouldn't want someone to date me if they weren't physically attracted to me.
I don't fully agree with you here. I will agree that I have some maturing to do, I believe that everyone has maturing to do. It may very well be true that she was bored, and as I mentioned in my last post in this thread I don't want to be with someone who is bored by me. I would rather meet someone who isn't bored and enjoys my conversation. I am not blaming any higher powers on last nights failed adventure and I am not really blaming my dating problem on anyone else, the problem is simply the fact that I am who I am and I have yet to meet someone who is satisfied fully with that.
I will use last night as a learning experience though, and talk more with someone and get to know them better before I decide to try and take them out. Perhaps you are right, I may never find someone. But for you to claim that I am not a respectful person I think is unfair. In fact as I said before I think it was very respectful that even before I took this girl out I had asked her if my choice of where to eat was okay with her, I opened the doors for her, I asked her what she wanted to do after we had dinner, she had no idea, I asked her if she liked coffee and she said yes, I asked her if Starbucks was okay, and she said yes. I was respectful to her enough that during the time we were together I attempted on many many occasions to get her to talk about herself and her goals and her life.
You are basing my level of respect based on a blog entry where I was drunk when I posted. I am not a disrespectful person.
Yeah, who knows why she went out with me. That doesn't matter now. But I will agree dating in Waco does suck, certainly if you are under the drinking age. I mean at least in Austin there is always something going on even for those who can't drink. I mean the 18+ clubs aren't near that great but there is always Alamo Drafthouse showing something or having special events.
Some more great advice, and you are right. I should try to be happy alone with my own hobbies/interests and wait until the right person comes along.
then theres my theory
everytime i get into a relationship im like truly happy for like a day
then god goes HA like you can't be happy
than proceeds to piss on my head
Added after posted:
Waco, Texas can't be worse than Hiawassee, GA theres nothing to do here my grad class was 59 people and the closest thing to a mall is walmart which unfortunately is 30 minutes away the nearest actual mall is 2 hours away in atl or in asheville, nc and every girl here is shallow only wants money so anyone looking for a decent relationship (eg. me) is frakked
everytime i get into a relationship im like truly happy for like a day
then god goes HA like you can't be happy
than proceeds to piss on my head
Added after posted:
Waco, Texas can't be worse than Hiawassee, GA theres nothing to do here my grad class was 59 people and the closest thing to a mall is walmart which unfortunately is 30 minutes away the nearest actual mall is 2 hours away in atl or in asheville, nc and every girl here is shallow only wants money so anyone looking for a decent relationship (eg. me) is frakked
But after only 1 date, she didn't even have time to discover these wonderful qualities. If she only gave him more of a chance....*le sigh*
I am me, and while I have clarified that I am not completely what was portrayed in that drunk post of mine on my blog I am who I am and I am sure I will meet someone one of these days who is happy with who I am.
First of all, it might be helpful if you post a pic of yourself. I noticed in your OP that you thought you were unattractive. Usually, people your age go through some physical awkwardness. I ought to know, I was awkward til 27! I have a feeling we could at least help you with this one thing, which might give your self-confidence a boost. This is something you do for yourself, not anyone else.
First off, thank you for your thoughtful and introspective reply. You come off as a completely different person than in that drunken blog entry.
On the above point, however, I am indeed basing it on your blog entry, but also on your initial post. You claimed to have been on the "worst date ever" and accused your date of being on drugs. Re-read that first post and think about how she would feel about you blasting her on a public forum. I believe that was pretty disrespectful to accuse this girl of being on drugs and a liar simply because you had a bad date.
Okay, so I don't know if she was on drugs, but she seemed out of it, and very mellow and like I said in my OP it was hard to tell if her pupils were dilated or not but the way she was talking and her general presentation led me to believe that something was not right. Now I could be completely wrong in the accusation but I believe that it is extremely possible. As for me calling her a liar, I think it was pretty obvious that she was lying about having a curfew, she is 18 years old and has to be home by 9:30? Why didn't she mention that prior to us going out. And the calls throughout the night? Perhaps she had plans afterwards or perhaps she just wanted to go home because the date wasn't to her liking, either way I strongly believe she lied about the curfew.
As for making those accusations on a public forum, I didn't mention her name, and since no one will know who she is I don't think there was any harm there. My belief that she was lying to me wasn't based on there being a bad date, I believe there were times when my ex-girlfriend wasn't entirely honest about things with me and we had great dates. My belief that she might have been high on something was based on traits that I saw as we were out including the tone of her voice, her speaking rather slow and seeming to ignore much of what I said. That might have been just because she was bored, I will never know because she wasn't entirely honest with me about whether or not she enjoyed the date ( I mean she wrote me to tell me she had a good time, but she obviously didn't).
In the end, we are beating a dead horse. The date wasn't good, I have no intention of seeing her again, end of story.