We've come to the conclusion that Apple doesn't really care if our iPads get stolen ( I guess they reason, we will just buy another one ), but they do care about our data; so they got it half right.
The iPad is still a pretty new device, maybe they will come up with a simple remote lock, I'm lost, modal, screen that cannot be overwritten without a password that you sent with the remote lock.
just thinking out loud
It's not that Apple doesn't care if your iPad is stolen, but that there is no practical way for them to do what you want.
Remote lock with password is a software lock. Pressing the power and home buttons together, then letting go of one while keeping the other pressed down, etc, is a hardware reset. By its very nature, a hardware reset overrides any software locks. Think about a regular desktop computer. Can anybody write a software program to prevent someone from physically pulling the power plug? No, you cannot. Trying to write a software lock for an iPad that prevents a hardware reset is the same thing. It's physically not possible.
Now, Apple *could* build iPads without a hardware reset. But if they did that, then when things go wrong with an iPad software-wise (for instance, we often see people posting in the forums about iPads stuck at the Apple logo, getting errors while trying to restore/update, etc), then there will be no way to recover from those situations, and a lot of people will have a $500-900 paperweight.
Apple does not publicize how to do a full hardware reset (DFU). If you read through their support pages, you'll find instructions on how to put your iPad into recovery mode, but not into DFU mode -- in fact, Apple doesn't even acknowledge that there is such a thing. It's supposed to be an "inside secret" known only to a select group of authorized people, such as service technicians. Unfortunately, the method has become easy to find on the Internet, primarily because of its use in jailbreaking iDevices.
What I'm trying to say is Apple is doing what it can to protect your data *and* your devices from theft, but a fool-proof counter-theft method just does not exist. Any counter-theft method has to be weighted against other concerns. Make it too hard for a thief to use the device, and you make things too inconvenient for legitimate users too. Apple is trying to strike a balance here, and IMO, it is doing a reasonable job.