MacBook Pro v Wife

[JamesMay82]

I’ve had my 14 inch pro for 12 months with not a single mark on it! Flawless screen.

My wife’s MacBook m1 Air broke so I used the opportunity to hand down the 14 pro and get me a new machine.

1 week later scratches and marks galore on this once beautiful machine!

I gave a big lecture and insisted it’s left at home and she iPads it at work and still it’s ruined!

She basically rests her iPhone on MacBook screen and it’s marked it all over!

Anyone else is the same boat! I’m gutted after keeping it so clean for so long 🤦‍♂️

 

[MacManiac76]

Maybe it's time to hand down the wife and get a new one of those as well. /s

 

[Apple_Robert]

In my opinion, you gave the Mac to your wife. Stop treating her like a kid. You are showing her a lot of disrespect. Leave it be.

 

[Arctic Moose]

It's just a ****ing laptop. 🤷‍♂️

Lighten up, you're going to give yourself an aneurysm.

 

[FatLouie]

In my opinion, you gave the Mac to your wife. Stop treating her like a kid. You are showing her a lot of disrespect. Leave it be.

14-inch MBP at 1600 dollars, she probably needs talking too.

I had a co-worker some years ago. Always carried the company laptop around by the opened screen. Boss finally had to ream him real good when they replaced the third screen.

 

[AndyMacAndMic]

14-inch MBP at 1600 dollars, she probably needs talking too.

I had a co-worker some years ago. Always carried the company laptop around by the opened screen. Boss finally had to ream him real good when they replaced the third screen.

So basically you are implying that the OP is the boss of his wife? Or that OP's wife is his employee? How do you imagine the 'she needs talking to' part will be? Does she have to stay in her room for a week without breakfast, or maybe throw in some good ol' fashioned corporal punishment for good measure?

 

[JamesMay82]

So basically you are saying that the OP is the boss of his wife? Or that his wife is his employee? You have IMO a 'special' view on marriage. How do you imagine the 'she needs talking to' part will be? Does she have to stay in her room for a week or throw in some good ol' fashioned corporal punishment?

Ha I’m the Master of the house!

Happily married 18 years and this didn’t cause an argument! I was just venting my frustration here to my fellow Apple aficionados.

The frustration being I look after my stuff where as she’s rough and ready with it all!

 

[eyoungren]

As a child I was often admonished by my father for how I treated the things he gave me. Which was fine, because he had paid for them and I was not his equal. But amongst friends (equals) it was understood that gifts were freely given with no strings attached. It became the property of the other person and was theirs to do with freely as they wished.

My wife is my equal. So, when I give her a gift, there are no demands or conditions attached to what is now her property. It's no longer my property. And because of that, I have no say in how she treats what is now hers. Just as I have no say in how people on this forum treat their property.

Aside from jointly held property between us, my wife has no say in how I treat my own property. This is a part of the respect between us - because we both as children were dictated at about how to treat things. None of this is to say we treat our stuff badly - just that it's not my business to tell my wife how to treat the gifts I give her and vice-versa.

OP, whatever you do with your wife is your business. I am simply stating how it is between me and my wife. For the record, my wife and I will have been married 28 years in November 2025.

 

[Scepticalscribe]

As a child I was often admonished by my father for how I treated the things he gave me. Which was fine, because he had paid for them and I was not his equal. But amongst friends (equals) it was understood that gifts were freely given with no strings attached. It became the property of the other person and was theirs to do with freely as they wished.

My wife is my equal. So, when I give her a gift, there are no demands or conditions attached to what is now her property. It's no longer my property. And because of that, I have no say in how she treats what is now hers. Just as I have no say in how people on this forum treat their property.

Aside from jointly held property between us, my wife has no say in how I treat my own property. This is a part of the respect between us - because we both as children were dictated at about how to treat things. None of this is to say we treat our stuff badly - just that it's not my business to tell my wife how to treat the gifts I give her and vice-versa.

OP, whatever you do with your wife is your business. I am simply stating how it is between me and my wife. For the record, my wife and I will have been married 28 years in November 2025.

Bravo, brilliant, and very well said, @eyoungren.

I am in complete agreement with you.

To the OP, @JamesMay82, once a gift (not a loan, as a loan is rather different, for, in that instance, you can expect it to be returned, preferably in the condition in which it had been lent to someone, and you will most certainly have the right to complain, or vent, or grumble, or rage if this is not the case), has been given to someone, it is no longer yours, but is now the possession of the person to whom you gave it, and - this is key - you have absolutely no say whatsoever in what is done with it, or how it is treated.

Reading your post, I somehow get the sense that you do not think that this computer actually really and truly belongs to your wife, but that it is somehow - psychologically - still yours.

"Insisted"?

It is not yours, not any longer; rather, it is now hers.

More to the point, she is a spouse, - thus, presumably, an adult - and not a child.

Therefore, what she does with it, and how she treats it, is none of your business.

 

[cateye]

I'm not immune to the idea of wanting something to look nice, especially when we pay a lot of money for these baubles, but to need to "vent" about it like some moral wrong was committed is where I tap out. There's no way I would waste the emotional capital in a marriage over something so trivial. It's a computer.

 

[Scepticalscribe]

Over the years, I have given a number of computers (MBAs), and iPads to each of my two brothers and, as it happened, my computers and iPads were always top of the range, and sometimes, they even still had Applecare.

As is the way of life, some of these devices came to an unfortunate end; there were scratched screens, once, an iPad was dropped, cracking the screen, (when my brother had inadvertently brushed against the cable), another time, the contents of my brother's car - a Volvo - (rather, the boot, what Our Transatlantic Cousins describe as 'a trunk') were robbed while he was taking a swim; he may have foolishly not taken the usual precautions; anyway, some stuff - including an iPad - went walkabout. And yes, one of the MBAs also suffered the indignity of a cracked screen - another cable dragging accident.

My point is, that once these devices have - had - been given away as gifts, they are (were) no longer mine, and their fate is no longer my concern; rather, I wish those to whom they have been given joy.

 

[Happy_John]

Hehehe, this thread is prime outrage bait. I’m not at all convinced that any of it is true.

So, in that spirit, I’ll add this..

So the OP’s better half had a Macbook, it died, and she needs a new one. The OP, the Prince Charming as he is, does NOT buy her a replacement. Instead he sees it as an opportunity to treat HIMSELF to a new laptop, and gives her the now unwanted hand-me-down. And he’s wondering why she is not treating it like… a brand new latest spec MacBook. Instead, she’s treating it as… a hand-me-down.

Is it really so surprising?

 

[williamofockham]

loosen up, I've been married for more than 1/2 century. you gave your wife your old system so you could buy a new one. once its out of your hands forget about it accept she's going to use it how she uses it. like the age old argument of putting things back where found them you can't win live with it, it's now an sep (somebody else's problem) grit your teeth and don't notice it

 

[AlaskaMoose]

Hehehe, this thread is prime outrage bait. I’m not at all convimceed that any of it is true.

So, in that spirit, I’ll add this..

So the OP’s better half had a Macbook, it died, and she needs a new one. The OP, the Prince Charming as he is, does NOT buy her a replacement. Instead he seems it as an opportunity to treat himself to a new laptop, and gives her the now unwanted hand-me-down. And he’s wondering whyshe is not treating it like… a brand new latest spec MacBook. Instead, she’s treating it as… a hand-me-down.

Is it really so surprising?

😊 It does seem that way.

 

[CalMin]

I’m super careful with my stuff but mostly because I am always selling and upgrading. My wife keeps her laptops forever and they get used hard. She doesn’t even see scratches or dings and her screen is gross. Same with our cars. I gave mansplaining her on this stuff years ago and we’re both happier for it.

 

[ForkHandles]

Wow!

To come onto an international forum to publicly berate your wife!

Then claim you’re happily married!

Just Wow!

 

[JSRinUK]

Perhaps next time, instead of handing it down, sell it to her. People tend to care more for things they pay for than those that they’re given.

And, if she doesn’t, then it’s her property now - so, who cares what she does with it?

 

[JamesMay82]

As a child I was often admonished by my father for how I treated the things he gave me. Which was fine, because he had paid for them and I was not his equal. But amongst friends (equals) it was understood that gifts were freely given with no strings attached. It became the property of the other person and was theirs to do with freely as they wished.

My wife is my equal. So, when I give her a gift, there are no demands or conditions attached to what is now her property. It's no longer my property. And because of that, I have no say in how she treats what is now hers. Just as I have no say in how people on this forum treat their property.

Aside from jointly held property between us, my wife has no say in how I treat my own property. This is a part of the respect between us - because we both as children were dictated at about how to treat things. None of this is to say we treat our stuff badly - just that it's not my business to tell my wife how to treat the gifts I give her and vice-versa.

OP, whatever you do with your wife is your business. I am simply stating how it is between me and my wife. For the record, my wife and I will have been married 28 years in November 2025.

I don’t disagree with the principle that a gift becomes the other person’s property, free of conditions. But I think there’s a difference between controlling how someone uses something and simply being upset when something you cared for gets damaged — especially when it’s something expensive or sentimental.

For me, it wasn’t about ownership or superiority. It was about different values when it comes to caring for things — and those kinds of value clashes happen in every relationship.

My wife and I have different standards when it comes to stuff like this. I vented about mine here as I figured some people would be in the same boat. Just like how the car forum guys complain about how their wives don’t look after their cars etc

We’re also still allowed to be annoyed at each other sometimes. That’s all part of the joys of marriage too.

Maybe I used too many exclamation marks on my original but it was meant in a lighthearted way!

 

[Sami13496]

This has to be a troll post — but if you’re being serious, I feel sorry for your wife. If the computer is hers now, then it’s her device. She doesn’t need to tiptoe around technology if she doesn’t want to. She has every right to use it however she chooses.

 

[Heinzja]

I’ve had my 14 inch pro for 12 months with not a single mark on it! Flawless screen.

My wife’s MacBook m1 Air broke so I used the opportunity to hand down the 14 pro and get me a new machine.

1 week later scratches and marks galore on this once beautiful machine!

I gave a big lecture and insisted it’s left at home and she iPads it at work and still it’s ruined!

She basically rests her iPhone on MacBook screen and it’s marked it all over!

Anyone else is the same boat! I’m gutted after keeping it so clean for so long 🤦‍♂️

Married more than 45 years and give up long time ago how women treat it stuff… is all in live to adaptation… (anyway you got a new MBP out of it - see it positive…) “Wife happy - live happy!”

IMHO your new MacBook will have a longer life than your marriage if you think that way without adaptability…

 

[Isamilis]

I’ve had my 14 inch pro for 12 months with not a single mark on it! Flawless screen.

My wife’s MacBook m1 Air broke so I used the opportunity to hand down the 14 pro and get me a new machine.

1 week later scratches and marks galore on this once beautiful machine!

I gave a big lecture and insisted it’s left at home and she iPads it at work and still it’s ruined!

She basically rests her iPhone on MacBook screen and it’s marked it all over!

Anyone else is the same boat! I’m gutted after keeping it so clean for so long 🤦‍♂️

Takeaway for OP: Don’t give your wife something precious you already own. Just get her a brand-new one instead.

 

[Parowdy]

If you have a new one yourself, why exactly does it matter to you how the machine you don’t use anymore looks?
I understand that all the effort you put into keeping it pristine is lost, but what can you do 🤷
maybe you should have sold it, bought another, lower tier Mac, and hand her that one?
I might be mad at my wife, too, but I’d recognize it’s just me being a b about stuff that’s not my concern anymore.

 

[TechRunner]

I guess I got lucky in this regard. I never have to pass any of my stuff down to my wife as she only uses Windows and Android and refuses to use anything Apple. I sleep great at night!

 

[Parowdy]

14-inch MBP at 1600 dollars, she probably needs talking too.

I had a co-worker some years ago. Always carried the company laptop around by the opened screen. Boss finally had to ream him real good when they replaced the third screen.

That’s offensively stupid. Carrying a laptop by its open screen would immediately disqualify a person from working at my place. Not even a Yoga should be carried that way. Common sense should be a minimum requirement.

 

[TechRunner]

That’s offensively stupid. Carrying a laptop by its open screen would immediately disqualify a person from working at my place. Not even a Yoga should be carried that way. Common sense should be a minimum requirement.

As someone who has a Yoga as a work laptop, I wholeheartedly agree. I've only carried it around in tablet mode a few times, and always safely tucked into the crook of my arm so the device is fully supported.