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D.E.A. agent #1: I'm taking these shoes into evidence.
D.E.A. agent #2: Jim, they're just shoes.
D.E.A. agent #1: Yes, but they're laced! 😱
 
Just tell him how strong he is. He thinks he's lifting his invisible friend--he does it all the time. Don't confront him or he'll flip!
 
Where's my bonus! 😡

I asked for staplers... not paper weights! 🙄

New Company policy: all employees must deposit footwear at beginning of shift... to ensure that they won't leave early. 😛

It is inevitable.... my boss will kick my *** when he finds out what I did to his presentation... all I can do is ease my pain. 😀

Send me in.... I am ready to negotiate. (few seconds later) ... We got the deal. 😎
 
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