You want to be LESS happy? Follow that advice.
Apple's return policy is, AFAIK, 30 days. Now, we're in holiday time, so they might have pushed that out, maybe. But I got burned exactly –ONE– time listening to advice from Apple like this, now I know better. ("Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me!") You need to talk to the manager of the Apple Store; get his name, phone number, etc. Make sure you ask ALL the questions, and have the manager detail to you how this is going to go down. Better yet, call Apple Support and see if they can't open a case and ask for it to be escalated to the Executive Support team. Because I have seen far too many times (including my "burn" time), where Apple people instruct users to do something, but then when the bottom falls out, they take and enforce zero personal/corporate responsibility for it.
(From a support standpoint, Apple is somewhat of an enigma. They get FANTASTIC grades on "support", from like J.D.Powers, etc. But the truth is, MOST customers grade "great" because they just never have problems. Many customers come from the Windows world, and not HAVING problems is a miracle in and of itself to them. When you do need Apple support, they tend to do great on basic stuff, obvious stuff. But when things go south, really REALLY south, they tend to fall flat on their faces. Search around the internet, you'll find the horror stories. In just my humble empirical experiences, companies like Dell suck, and their support sucks… but in a "dynamic range" audio compression sense, they suck at average volumes, but tend tend to suck disproportionately less at really bad problems, the LOUD stuff: they just replace the kit. And they'll handhold through the process. Apple, OTOH, has a much higher "failure" rate on the worst problems. They stall, they lie, they act as if they have no recourse to help. All when usually merely shipping a new product out would solve the problem. I do often read about Apple store managers just handing users new equipment, but I think those stories happen less than the horror stories. Granted, in this case, Apple doesn't have the kit to just ship out to you; but they certainly should bump you in the queue. The long story short, I suppose, is "Be Prepared." Just make sure you are covered, make sure you are clear on how the process will go… because you have a lot of money tied up in that 2016 rMBP, and I wouldn't recommend relying on Apple as a corporation to have your back.)