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puma1552

Suspended
Original poster
Nov 20, 2008
5,559
1,948
A couple months ago I got a new parking neighbor in my garage at my apartment complex. The neighbor I had before was fine, no issues, never damaged my vehicle or scratched it or parked super close, etc.

So far the new neighbor has been fine. I have still not seen this person though which I would like to so I can get an idea who the person is. Their vehicle only moves once or twice a week, which is fine with me. But it does go someplace once in a while.

Last night their car was gone when I got home from work. I parked my car as far over to the right in my spot that I could (I park to the right of this vehicle, and my wife parks to the right of me so I parked as close to my wife as I could, like I always do). Our parking spots are actually a good size, large enough so when I do this my door can't reach his car and vice versa.

I come down this morning to go to work and almost immediately notice someone had rubbed up against my rear door, leaving pretty significant scratching and marring of the clear coat. I may or may not be able to get it all out with a cutting pad and cutting polish, but I shouldn't have to do that to a car that's 8 months old. No note left of course. I know for a fact this was done by the neighbor when they returned because I had checked the car over really good when I parked it last night, plus the car is dirty and there was no disturbances in the dirt on the car from someone rubbing up on it when I parked it.

Needless to say I'm pretty pissed. Typical take no responsibility situation and think it's perfectly ok to rub up on someone's car, scratching it pretty bad, when there are over 3 feet of space between the vehicles. I had noticed he had boxes in the rear passenger side, and now those are gone so I'm pretty certain it happened when unloading the car last night.

I want to leave a note or say something because I don't think it's right that I should just say "You ****ed up my car, ok that's fine" and do nothing about it, but on the other hand I have to park next to this guy for probably at least ten more months (I have no interest in switching parking spots, my wife and I currently are next to each other on the end of a row out of the way from everyone which is about as good as it gets, so long as the person next to me is respectful since that's the only person that our cars are "exposed" to). I do want to leave a post-it note on his window though, but I'm not sure what to say.

Ideas? Nothing pisses me off more than working so hard for what I have, being a car guy and going the extra mile to keep my cars flawless, parking far away from everyone everywhere, etc., only to have the douchebag that I have to park next to every damn day damage it even when I'm parked in such a way to give him absolute maximum room and think I won't notice or care on a brand new vehicle. :mad:
 
Tough call.

If you knew the person you could approach and ask gently, something like "Hey, I noticed you had a bunch of boxes in your car yesterday, and after that, I noticed that my car has a new scratch.. any chance one of your boxes might have accidentally bumped my car?" Notice the careful wording of that question, nowhere do I outright accuse the person, I used passive voice, and I used the word "accidentally".

Best case scenario the guy 'fesses and says "Oooh, yeah, that was me, so sorry, here let me pay for that". Worst case scenario the guy denies it. Somewhere in the middle the guy might say "Yeah, that might have been me, sorry about that" -- at which point you need to make a call whether you want to further broach the subject of paying for repairs. It may be worth it to swallow this one and say "Hey, thanks for apologizing, I'll take care of it this time" and leave knowing you are on good terms with your neighbor yet he is aware that you are watching your car. If he's a good guy he'll be much more careful in the future.

Keeping in mind that you are parking neighbors for the next while, you want to keep relations good between you, if you come in too hot and piss off your neighbor, you might just find more mysterious scratches show up later... Not sure if a passive-aggressive approach like the above website is a good idea for dealing with someone you will continue to encounter.
 
Such is life parking in a garage with others. Go find a really big box from a refrigerator or big appliance, flatten it out and put it up against your car when you park for the night.
 
Accept this is an aspect of parking in a parking lot? You could put a note on their car or knock on their door but the odds are that they won't accept responsibility. As far as a legal remedy, I don't really see one. :(

Agreed. Cars are going to get scratched, it sucks but it is part of life.
 
^^^That's really all I want is for him/her to take personal responsibility and just say "Yeah, I was pretty careless, it was me, sorry, I'll be more careful to make sure it won't happen again."

I'm going to buff it out myself, lucky for that guy and lucky for me I have a buffer and a full array of detailing stuff so I can *hopefully* get it out. God knows I've seen too many people at body shops and detail shops have no clue how to finish; my wife's new Beetle had to have the rear bumper re-cleared four times because they kept burning the paint with the rotary buffer so I do everything I can to avoid anyone but myself doing any detail work.

I just want the peace of mind that my car is safe in my garage and that I don't have to constantly worry about it getting damaged from someone who doesn't give a F. If they say yeah it was me, sorry I should've left a note, then I will feel a lot better about it not happening again. But if they blow it off because they aren't car people and don't see any reason to respect anyone else's stuff because their car is very blah, then that's not going to put me at ease.

Legally I know there's nothing I can do, nor nothing I really want besides an apology and admission of responsibility. Irks the living hell out of me why people think it's ok to scratch someone's car, leave dings in parking lots, scrape someone's car, and just drive off like it's no big deal and "just part of owning a car." IMO taking personal responsibility trumps that, if I ever left even a little ding or scratch on someone's car you better believe I'd leave a note apologizing and willing to pay for repairs.

EDIT: I was replying to notjustjay, should've quoted but didn't think a bunch of people would reply at the same time.

Some of these replies are disheartening, that I should just suck it up and accept that a brand new vehicle that I worked hard for is going to get messed up by other people and that I should be ok with it. That makes me also wonder if these are the same kind of people that ding and scratch others' cars in parking lots and don't feel any guilt or responsibility.
 
^^^ How about ask him/her in a diplomatic manner to be more careful in the future? Maybe he would offer to pay something, but don't hold your breath. ;)
 
Agreed. Cars are going to get scratched, it sucks but it is part of life.

They shouldn't be scratched because some jerk is careless and doesn't care if he rams your car with their door or whatever they hit the OP's car with.

My first guess failed, so I gave up. :p

It begins with an A and ends with an E. ;)

Some of these replies are disheartening, that I should just suck it up and accept that a brand new vehicle that I worked hard for is going to get messed up by other people and that I should be ok with it. That makes me also wonder if these are the same kind of people that ding and scratch others' cars in parking lots and don't feel any guilt or responsibility.

Some people are heartless. It's a fact of life though that has to be accepted that people in parking lots don't give two ***** about hitting your car with their door and if they damage it. I feel your pain. I hate getting scratches on my car especially since it is a black car. Most of them are just driving and a stone is kicked up or whatever. Nothing I could have done to prevent that. But, if I was coming up to my car in a parking lot and saw someone just fling their door open without care about it hitting my car, I would flip. You might as well have crashed into my car.

People have parked their cars in front of my garage preventing me from getting my car out. So had to have them tow the car away. But, it made me miss a test in one of my classes. Thankfully I was able to make it up. On a sweet justice note, one of the jackasses that parked in front of my garage ordered pizza that night, but couldn't pay for it because he left his wallet in the car. Take that oh sweet justice *******. :D

And I can't stand it when I park in the middle of no where to prevent jerk's from dinging my door, etc and out of all the empty spots around me, some jackass decides to park right next to my car.
 
Some people are heartless. It's a fact of life though that has to be accepted that people in parking lots don't give two ***** about hitting your car with their door and if they damage it. I feel your pain. I hate getting scratches on my car especially since it is a black car. Most of them are just driving and a stone is kicked up or whatever. Nothing I could have done to prevent that. But, if I was coming up to my car in a parking lot and saw someone just fling their door open without care about it hitting my car, I would flip. You might as well have crashed into my car.

I've been on both ends, and I know it's not fun. Years ago, when I was younger and less responsible, I remember driving to McDonald's with a carload of excited 12-year-old boys from my church. As soon as I turned off the engine the boys FLUNG open the doors in their haste to get into the restaurant. Well, one door slammed HARD into the car parked next to mine, leaving a mark. I chickened out, and moved the car to a different parking spot.

Another time, I was driving an SUV and I was just a tiny bit too wide while turning into my parking spot. I felt the corner of my car nudge the car next to mine. However, what felt like a gentle nudge in the driver's seat turned out to leave a HUGE scratch. This time I decided to suck it up and take responsibility, so I waited by the victim's car until she returned from her shopping, then gently and carefully broke the bad news. She was not happy, of course, but at the same time she was surprised that I didn't just try to run away. And a good thing, too -- it turned out she was one of my coworkers! I got her repair quote and paid up ($700!). Have been much more careful ever since then.
 
I've been on both ends, and I know it's not fun. Years ago, when I was younger and less responsible, I remember driving to McDonald's with a carload of excited 12-year-old boys from my church. As soon as I turned off the engine the boys FLUNG open the doors in their haste to get into the restaurant. Well, one door slammed HARD into the car parked next to mine, leaving a mark. I chickened out, and moved the car to a different parking spot.

I would be a bit more understanding in that situation since they are kids( should know better, but sometimes they can't help it), but I would expect you to pay for the repair if I wanted to get it repaired.

If it was you, I would flip out on you. As an adult, you should know better and be more careful.
 
I would be a bit more understanding in that situation since they are kids( should know better, but sometimes they can't help it), but I would expect you to pay for the repair if I wanted to get it repaired.

If it was you, I would flip out on you. As an adult, you should know better and be more careful.

Absolutely, and if it were to happen today, I'd definitely have offered to pay for repairs. I feel bad in retrospect for not only chickening out on my own responsibility, but inadvertently teaching the kid who did it that it was OK to run away.

Nowadays if I drive with kids in the car I'll park somewhere further away. :p
 
my car is also black

ive had people gently brush up against my cars in the past where you can see a swish in the dust on the car which is bad enough like maybe a ladys purse as she walked by, but this is some serious marring like someone pressed hard up against the car...it is in the cleqrcoat only thankfully, but i do have doubts i can get it out with a cutting pad and cutting polish, even with my experience detailing and polishing.

i am going to leave a note tonight, just havent decided how to word it; itll have to be somewhat polite while still letting them know im not happy about it.
 
I know how you feel. I had 3 door dings within the first 2 weeks of getting my new car and I park my car extremely carefully. My car is also black so it shows the slightest mark. Unfortunately there is nothing I can do but live with it. :(
 
I know how you feel. I had 3 door dings within the first 2 weeks of getting my new car and I park my car extremely carefully. My car is also black so it shows the slightest mark. Unfortunately there is nothing I can do but live with it. :(

I have the same problem. I want to keep the car for a long time, so I'm just accepting the fact that it is bound to happen. We'll see how long that lasts
 
^^^That's really all I want is for him/her to take personal responsibility and just say "Yeah, I was pretty careless, it was me, sorry, I'll be more careful to make sure it won't happen again."
Look, I don't know how you could possibly know it was in fact your neighbor. You claim that you looked the car over before you went in, but why? If you're this paranoid about parking in a garage then perhaps you really do need to look into asking if you can get another spot next to yours. If not, you will have to live with it. If you're going to take your car out at all or let it be seen in public, then this will happen. It shouldn't be disheartening that people aren't forming a mob for you and rallying around you. It is just a fact of life that cars get scratched.

My brand new truck was struck by something the month after I bought it. I work just as hard as you do, undoubtedly, and it bothered me. I could assume it was the guy who always parked next to me but I didn't because chances are, it wasn't him. It was a dent in a place where I could not have possibly missed it the day I got out of the truck and still, I wouldn't be so bold as to blame the guy next to me.

You seem very wounded by this when it is something that just happens. I don't think it's bad to say that or to even not be pro-blame on the neighbor. Hopefully you can buff it out and be done with it. Continue to work hard and get some place where you can get a garage. In the meantime, take the refrigerator box advice.
 
A scuff or incidental ding is a tough call. You could be honest about it and get hit with a $1000 repaint bill that the owner will pocket.

Shouldnt matter what the owner does with the money, if you damaged it you should be responsible and pay for it regardless.

Either way, I would use the money to fix the car but that's a moot point in this case.
 
First, look around very carefully to see if there are any cameras. If not, then throw a brick through their windshield.
 
I think about all I can do today is put a note on the driver's window that says "Please be more careful when getting in/out and loading/unloading your vechicle, thanks"

The note could be from either me or the guy on his other side, doesn't make any accusations, and is vague. But since they know what they did and who they did it to, they will know exactly what the note refers to and who left it.
 
I think about all I can do today is put a note on the driver's window that says "Please be more careful when getting in/out and loading/unloading your vechicle, thanks"

The note could be from either me or the guy on his other side, doesn't make any accusations, and is vague. But since they know what they did and who they did it to, they will know exactly what the note refers to and who left it.

Or you could brick the **** out of their car.
 
Swap parking spaces with your wife!

Sadly in life you get selfish idiots. My next door neighbour decided to spray paint some picture frames about 2ft from my car. It was parked on my drive, but rather than use his backyard, garage or 2 sheds he decided to use his front lawn right next to my drive.
 
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