photos syncing problems and diagnostic and usage

itunes is not syncing photos from "photos" to my iPhone. it says its copying 4000 picures to my iPhone
but i never see the pictures and iTunes always throws them in "other"

it is also syncing videos that i already have on the iPhone

lets say i have 28 gigs of pictures as reported by the phone
itunes will say i have 8 gigs of pictures and 20 gigs of other.

this is not "restore your iPhone other " they are not junk files, but my pictures.

i prove this by unsync photos, the other disappears and its down to a more manageable 600 megabytes

I've tried DFU , restore from backup. i tried rebuilding the photo library.

i checked my library and there was 4 apps missing, so that fixed the last restore operation , where it got stuck and did not sync podcasts.

I'm still seeing like 4555 pictures on photos but only 2000 pictures on the iPhone.

im not seeing a folder like "pictures from mac"

i deleted all the weird folders like 'march 12 2012" etc etc but the pictures are intact

the only other thing i haven't tried is setting up as new, or exporting originals and trashing the photo library all together and adding the originals back, another thing i can try doing is deleting my entire camera roll. but i am worried


also no matter what i do , itunes never clears diagnostic and usage data from my phone, it just sits there
and keeps adding up

 

i tried rebuilding the library from scratch, it just made it worse , photos does not like importing 4500 pictures at once

i went back to my old photo library

itunes syncs photos and finishes

iPhone 6 is stuck on 'syncing" on photo album

all i see are duplicate videos from iTunes being written to my phone

the pictures just wind up in 'other' and have to be unsynced

my friend says go to 1 on 1 but i don't know what they will do, except set up my iPhone as new


i am lost

 

yeah i trashed my backups already, i also did a dfu.

i worry about doing set up as new because i like to keep iMessages around forever


now iTunes says i have 11 gigs of photos and 56 gigs of free space
but the iPhone says i have 28 gigs of photos and 35 gigs of free space

something else worth mentioning is that the problem with diagnostic and usage files staying on my iPhone is something that is wrong with the iPad as well, so it has to be something wrong with iTunes
and maybe a restore as new won't do anything