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Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by chaos86, Jul 31, 2007.

  1. chaos86 macrumors 65816

    chaos86

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2003
    Location:
    127.0.0.1
    #1
    I'm about to augment the terrible parenting that most American men seem to have received.

    When you have to urinate in a public bathroom, and no urinals are available follow these steps:
    1) Find an empty toilet stall
    2) Lift the seat
    3) Pee in the toilet
    4) Flush

    Now I know your parents never taught you about step number two, but try at it into your routine from now on.

    Also, do your part to help prevent forest fires.
     
  2. calculus Guest

    calculus

    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2005
    #2
    This is good advice and easy to follow, in fact it's a piece of piss...
     
  3. Lau Guest

    #3
    It's easy to follow, but a lot of men* seem to have a wee bit of trouble with it.

    *Disclaimer – a lot of women are also vile in toilets, though not me, obviously. ;)
     
  4. TheAnswer macrumors 68030

    TheAnswer

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2002
    Location:
    Orange County, CA
    #4
    A past related thread...

    Also...make sure you put both the seat and lid down before you flush you toilet at home...otherwise, you'll have a problem with the meest.
     
  5. Lau Guest

    #5
    Well, then urine big trouble.
     
  6. Jaffa Cake macrumors Core

    Jaffa Cake

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2004
    Location:
    The City of Culture, Englandshire
    #6
    Hey, the Op has a cistern and he's sticking to it.
     
  7. 2nyRiggz macrumors 603

    2nyRiggz

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2005
    Location:
    Thank you Jah...I'm so Blessed
    #7
    Don't forget for health & safety reasons:

    2b. Lift toilet seat with shoes(doesn't matter what brand) in puplic bathrooms




    Bless
     
  8. MacNut macrumors Core

    MacNut

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2002
    Location:
    CT
  9. Bobdude161 macrumors 65816

    Bobdude161

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2006
    Location:
    N'Albany, Indiana
    #9
    haha. i pee on the seat because i enjoy the suffering that other people go through to clean it up before they use it! just kidding
     
  10. OutThere macrumors 603

    OutThere

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2002
    Location:
    NYC
    #10
    I usually lift the seat, but, then again, who really ***ts in a public bathroom?
     
  11. jellz macrumors regular

    Joined:
    May 5, 2007
    #11
    you'll be surprised out-there....road trips? haha gas station toliets are the worst!
     
  12. Maui macrumors 6502a

    Maui

    Joined:
    May 18, 2007
    #12
    5) Wash your hands
    6) Wash your hands, try it with soap this time
     
  13. psycoswimmer macrumors 65816

    psycoswimmer

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2006
    Location:
    USA
    #13
    2c. Also flush by pushing down lever with shoe.
     
  14. ErikCLDR macrumors 68000

    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2007
    #14
    Do what I do. Don't use public restrooms, they're always nasty.

    Luckily for me I never have to go to the bathroom.
     
  15. chaos86 thread starter macrumors 65816

    chaos86

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2003
    Location:
    127.0.0.1
    #15
    I try to avoid it, but sometimes I find the need to sit on a public toilet seat. If you've pissed on it, I wish I could hunt you down, tie you up, splash my urine on your thighs to see how you like it.
     
  16. steamboat26 macrumors 65816

    steamboat26

    Joined:
    May 25, 2006
    Location:
    Arlington VA
  17. imac/cheese macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2007
    #17
    Do you not look at the seat before you sit down? I agree it is a pain to have to use a public toilet and find that the seat has urine on it but there are normally other stalls or at the very least you could wipe the seat so you don't get urine on your thighs.
     
  18. cleanup macrumors 68030

    cleanup

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2005
    Location:
    Toronto
    #18
    Dude! You got urine on your thighs?! :eek: Didn't you at very least wipe the seat down with some toilet paper first?! Or were you so infuriated that you couldn't bother?! GROSS! :rolleyes:

    [edit] the cheese beat me to it.
     
  19. bartelby macrumors Core

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2004
    #19
    I was talking to one of the cleaners in work the other day. She said that the women's toilets were WAY worse than the blokes!

    She said that a couple of times she's found sh*t on the floor of the women's compared to a slight sprinkling of p*ss in the blokes.

    Some dried snot on the walls in the blokes compared to, what could only be, sh*t on the walls of the women's.

    :eek:
     
  20. Peace macrumors Core

    Peace

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2005
    Location:
    Space--The ONLY Frontier
    #20
    Good advise.I'd add close the lid after using.

    I had two female and one male roomates a long time ago and the gals put a sign above the toilet that said :

    Please stand closer.It's not as long as you think.
    Thank You.


    Funny stuff..
     
  21. iGav macrumors G3

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2002
    #21
    Are you surprised? these are Welsh women you are talking about. Hardly a prime example of the species. ;)
     
  22. bartelby macrumors Core

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2004
    #22
    If you'd been anyone else I'd be pretty offended by you insulting my wife like that!
     
  23. it5five macrumors 65816

    it5five

    Joined:
    May 31, 2006
    Location:
    New York
    #23
    So true!

    I worked at a gas station for 2 years and had to clean bathroom there. Then I was the janitor at a grocery store for about 6 months.

    The women's bathroom always smelled worse and had much bigger messes.

    Over my janitorial career, I found about 6 pairs of underwear in the women's bathroom with poop in them. I've seen poop on the walls, poop on the floor, poop in the trash can.

    Oh, and I hate how people would put dirty diapers in the tampon disposals next to the toilet instead of the ****ing trash can.
     
  24. MacNut macrumors Core

    MacNut

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2002
    Location:
    CT
  25. iGav macrumors G3

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2002
    #25
    You married the enemy??? :eek: That's quite the dilemma should ever Wales start a war for independence. ;)
     

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