Sweater from the Mothership

rontheancient

macrumors regular
Original poster
Nov 22, 2005
224
0
USA
I bought a black sweater with a grey Apple logo from the company store, and wore it for the first time yesterday. Here is what happened...

I got off class and began to bike back to my dorm when WHAM..., my front wheel gets caught with the pedal of another bike and down I went on my backpack, which had my Powerbook and PDA in it (which are ok). The person and I get through all the formalities, the sorries, etc., then I get back on the bike. Two minutes later, I collide with a pedestrian, having my handlebar hook into the pedestrians sweater pocket, causing me to land on my backpack.

Again, with all the formalities done, I proceed... at a slower pace, until I narrowly miss a UPS truck turning into the road. Three minutes later, I glance at something and return looking forward only to find a big hunk of red aluminium that is a Unitrans Bus infront of me, I brake hard enough so that I am a inch from rear ending the bus.

The next day, I am getting a cup of coffee at the dining commons, when I accidentally knock it to the ground, breaking the cup, and spilling coffee on me. Later, I attend my Calculus class only to be lost and utterly clueless about the material covered. Once I return to my dorm, I find that I left my key card in the room, but I was able to get back in anyway.


What do these unfortunate events have to do with the sweater you ask? I was wearing that sweater in all those events and those events are the only mishaps I had so far in the last month.


So........

Would anyone like to buy a fairly new Apple branded sweater?
 

pknz

macrumors 68020
Mar 22, 2005
2,480
1
NZ
What did you do to piss the man off upstairs?

Also, can you post a pic of it?
 

rontheancient

macrumors regular
Original poster
Nov 22, 2005
224
0
USA
I dont have a camera with me, but I will take some pictures when I fly back home tomorrow. BTW, I am not wearing that thing on the plane.
 
E

emac kinda guy

Guest
Sweater from the Mothership

Well not entirely on topic,

If you keep colliding with pedestrians, maybe you should give them more room. It really bothers me when an inconsiderate cyclist blows past me, from behind, at high speed on a pedestrian path. Like I should anticpate them going past?

It isn't your sweater - it's your riding skills.

A little advice, one of those larger vehicles you mention could put an end to your angst really quickly.

Just my 2 cents.
 

azzurri000

macrumors 6502
Nov 9, 2005
307
0
Yikes, you sure have been having some bad luck there. The upside, though, is that I doubt that the coffee was able to stain it.

I suggest you give that sweater as a gift to someone you dislike... they'll never be the wiser to it muawhahaha.
 

rontheancient

macrumors regular
Original poster
Nov 22, 2005
224
0
USA
MoparShaha said:
Off topic, but I assume you're in Davis?

I've ridden Unitrans many a time whilst drunk :cool:.


Yep, im a Aggie. The sweater has no visible stain on it, but it does smell of coffee, the bad thing is that it just came out of the wash only a hour before the accident... the one with the coffee.
As for my biking skills, im a freshman, so does that kinda excuse me?

The cool thing about the bike crashes is that I was joking around after the crash. The pedestrian I hit didnt even fall down, while I was kissing the asphalt (which I kinda deserved), he began to tell me how the handle bar got caught in his pocket and I asked "Is the pocket ok?".
 

SmurfBoxMasta

macrumors 65816
Nov 24, 2005
1,350
0
I'm only really here at night.
eewww.......the evil transcending, accident-inducing sweater from hell :D

but seriously though, do NOT take any pics of it, or it will proliferate rapidly and haunt your entire wardrobe forever.

And then there will be numerous very late night visits from 3 guys in extremely black suits, with very big, strange looking guns, who will somehow convince you to undergo several very unusual but harmless medical procedures at a remote lab located at a place you've never heard of before :p

ps: dont worry, the trip to the lab & back only takes 131.6590147 light years, during which you will only age .000003952 seconds
 

GoCubsGo

macrumors Nehalem
Feb 19, 2005
35,743
142
rontheancient said:
So........

Would anyone like to buy a fairly new Apple branded sweater?

LMFAO! I'm sorry but in the end, this is the best post I've seen in a while! You're quite funny. You can't ride a bike for **** and you're probably to blame for that, but you're still funny.
 

rontheancient

macrumors regular
Original poster
Nov 22, 2005
224
0
USA
jessica. said:
LMFAO! I'm sorry but in the end, this is the best post I've seen in a while! You're quite funny. You can't ride a bike for **** and you're probably to blame for that, but you're still funny.
Glad people are having as much fun as I had.

As for my bike skills, you gotta take into account that

1) Im a freshman, and school just started last week.
2) A 240lb tub of lard like me is not built for riding bikes, higher center of gravity.
3) Im not too bright.
4) I have the attention span of a carrot and the IQ of one too.

The fact that I just noticed that 3 and 4 are pretty much the same confirms statements 3 and 4.