Template/Design Critique

Discussion in 'Design and Graphics' started by razorianfly, Oct 11, 2008.

  1. razorianfly macrumors 65816

    razorianfly

    Joined:
    Oct 16, 2007
    Location:
    Cheshire, United Kingdom
    #1
    Hey Guys,

    I recently posted this in the Web and Development forum, but thought I'd post over here too to get your opinions / views.

    I'm in the midst of setting myself up in the graphic design market. I've been in graphic design now for almost 9 years,
    thoroughly enjoy doing it, and yesterday came up with this template for my new domain RFlyGD.com:

    razorianfly.com/rfgd

    So far, I've just uploaded a test directory at some other hosting account I own,
    just while I test and iron things out. Note that the template is far from finished.

    I also currently have a teaser page uploaded as the index of RFlyGD.com

    Any comments, needed improvements or strong critique's are very welcome.

    Thanks,
    R-Fly
     
  2. LeviG macrumors 65816

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2006
    Location:
    Norfolk, UK
    #2
    sorry but that is ghastly, it doesn't seem to have any cohesion either in my view.

    Blogs about 'keynotes' have no place on a business site either.

    Grammar/spelling needs sorting on most of it as well.

    And as a side note your sig is breaking forum rules too (no advertising)
     
  3. mathcolo macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Sep 14, 2008
    Location:
    Massachusetts
    #3
    For someone with a 13" screen like me, the web site looks very off-center. You need to center it and put the images as background instead of just images.

    [​IMG]
     
  4. Topher15 macrumors 6502a

    Topher15

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2007
    Location:
    London
    #4
    Why do you have a blog post section (Filled with Apple no less!) on your business page? Your clients will have no interest in your blog. They will be interested in your work, and that blog section will just be taking up space which could be used to show work off.

    Also...

    - The background might be okay as a piece of work in its own right (I like it), but as a background it is too distracting. It might look better if the content area of the site was one centred block, and that background 'seeped out' from the sides. That might work.

    - The paint splats in each box are even more distracting. Either use them or the background (imo). Using both is too much. At the moment they are competing with each other for the most dominant design feature of the page. If you use the paint splats in each box, make it more subtle... perhaps use a heading bar for each box and keep it inside that.

    - Get rid of the masking tape.
     
  5. SwiftLives macrumors 65816

    SwiftLives

    Joined:
    Dec 7, 2001
    Location:
    Charleston, SC
    #5
    Way too much going on. I'd go so far as to say it looks a bit "overdesigned," if such a thing is possible.

    I think if you implemented a much simpler and somewhat less-vibrant color scheme, it would help tremendously. Especially in the background.
     
  6. Delameko macrumors member

    Joined:
    May 1, 2008
    #6
    I don't think the header really fits with the paint splotches, it feels like it's from a different design.

    Remove the masking tape from the corners of the two boxes - I don't understand why it's there?

    I know you don't say you design websites, but the coding is hideous. All absolute positioning. Fireworks export? It means the whole thing is positioned fine on a 1680x1050 resolution, but anything lower and it starts disappearing off the right side of the screen.

    Your opening text, "Combining first class designers...", based on the rest of the text I'm guessing it's just you. Don't lie to potential clients, there's nothing wrong with you doing it by yourself at first. You can change the text when/if you actually do have some employees.

    I agree with the others about the blog post, remove it. People aren't looking at the site for entertaining content, they're looking to see what you can do and if you're capable of creating what they're looking for. At best it's wasting space, at worst your opinion on a blog post will be the opposite of a potential client and they'll just leave.

    And "Design like you've NEVER seen it before"... you're just asking for people to take it in the negative.

    Having said all that, there's some nice graphics in there. Just too many in one place.
     
  7. wongulous macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Dec 7, 2002
    #7
    Great colors, nice layout, a very good start at branding, and in parts, some very nice work.

    As a whole, it is garish, overly busy, fragmented, distracting, and hackneyed (design firm = artist = paint splatters, how original). Cliched or not, please tell me that you at least created the paint splatters yourself... because if you didn't, then there is absolutely nothing original about this. Don't use Aqua, don't use 20 different effects you've learned on PS tutorials, don't put a MySpace photo of yourself on the contact page, lose the masking tape (a cute effect but not here), and for the love of god get rid of that abhorrent script typeface, or use less of it. And "Design like you've never seen it before" is just as cheesy as the rest of this concept, plus arrogant. Yes, you have the skills. Yes, you have an eye for color and design. Yes, it has all been well-executed. But in the words of Tim Gunn, "Is this even beautiful?"

    That said, I'm sure you could make a beautiful poster with a more edited version of this aesthetic--but web design and a professional, classic image for your design firm != crazy eye-catching poster.
     
  8. Yr Blues macrumors 68020

    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2008
    #8
    Design like I've never seen before? Really? This is why I hate advertising, even though I do graphic design.

    I get resumes from people all the time claiming to be the best or the most unique or the hardest working...blah blah blah...why can't people just tell the truth? Like, "I try to be the best I can be" or "I strive to be more creative than the competition"...or even more truthful..."I excel in [this] style whereas I do not excel in [another] style"

    Oh well...

    End rant.

    Take out the sales pitch and your website will be just fine. It's a bit of a jumbled mess, but if that's your style...more power to you.
     
  9. Me1000 macrumors 68000

    Me1000

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2006
    #9
    1. add a white layer on top of your background in photoshop, and drop the opacity of the new layer to like 50%
    2. center up the design, so it is resolution independent.
    3. replace img tags in the DIVs with backgrounds for the divs...


    I think the design has potential...
     
  10. Krebstar macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2008
    #10
    First thing I noticed. Problem is, someone who may not be looking to critique might see that and then close out of the site because they don't want to mess with it.
     
  11. anim8or macrumors 65816

    anim8or

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2006
    Location:
    Scotland, UK
    #11
    Its VERY VERY busy....

    Let your work do the talking on the design front, sometimes less is more and in this case i think it is true.

    Keep your site simple and accessible with subtle design touches and prospective clients will be attracted to the work instead of scared off by overcomplicated home page design.

    That said i do like the design, i just dont think it is right for this space.
     
  12. razorianfly thread starter macrumors 65816

    razorianfly

    Joined:
    Oct 16, 2007
    Location:
    Cheshire, United Kingdom
    #12
    Thank you all for your constructive criticism.

    As this has been my first real go with dream weaver I hadn't noticed that the width of the images as a whole, was actually a valid issue.
    I'll be sure to look into how to resolve this shortly.

    I understand the site design is abit 'OMG', but it's the way I intended it.
    Now you've all pointed out this is way OTT, I'll be sure to tone it down a little.
    I just have wild ideas up there, and Photoshop helps me release them.

    Any further information as to how to perform backgrounds via CSS and/or creating/aligning div tags would be greatly appreciated.
    It's fair to say although I'm not new to the whole 'design/photoshop' side of things, I'm a little sketchy on using HTML and text editors.

    Cheers,
    R-Fly
     
  13. opeter macrumors 65816

    opeter

    Joined:
    Aug 5, 2007
    Location:
    Slovenia, EU
    #13
    Yes, Photoshop and other apps can do wonder. But sometimes, we have to control ourselfs. And as someone wrote before: sometimes less is more.

    You could use something like Freeway, if you like more DTP stylish webdesign.
     
  14. DaveTheGrey macrumors 6502a

    DaveTheGrey

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2003
  15. Krebstar macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2008
    #15
    Just looked at this again, and while the colors look nice, they really distract the eye from trying to read the actual content on the site.
     
  16. liptonlover macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Mar 13, 2008
    #16
    I'm not nearly an expert on this stuff but I like the business... to me it shows that you're very creative and at least decently talented, just from the background. But everyone else here says take it out, you may want to listen to them.
    I also like your logo, though I hope the grey octagon thing around it isn't part of it...

    Critiques:
    I can see all of your information, but it's still telling me I can scroll a lot because of your background. That's not good. It's supposed to be the background.
    The blog thing shouldn't be there. Maybe if you want to put it somewhere in some small corner, but certainly not on the front page. This is your graphic design site/page.
    You shouldn't mention Apple unless you only accept Mac users as customers or something like that.
    You say "we" a lot, but then you say "me" in one place. Stick with the same person.
     
  17. motoxpress macrumors 6502

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2006
    #17
    Actually, I like the scheme, I think you just need to give it more visual priority...throw the user a map. If you took the paint splats (although they tend to be used a lot) and kept them in the header and then gradually took us to place with a little more calm in the content it would work quite well.

    As to the person who questioned the blog...your outta date. A blog is a very useful tool for promotion. For those who are looking to hire him, they may enjoy learning more about him through his writing. If someone doesn't care about it, they don't click. Simple.

    -mx
     
  18. Ryvius macrumors member

    Joined:
    May 4, 2004
    #18
    I'll echo most of the comments, but most seriously having to scroll horizontal to get the perfect centered view is really a deal breaker. That should be priority #1 to fix.
     

Share This Page