The OFFICAL Funny Thread - AKA JOkes R us

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by StokeLee, Oct 30, 2005.

  1. StokeLee macrumors 6502


    May 30, 2005
    Stoke-on-Trent. Midlands, UK
    Your Best Clean Jokes, CLEAN> CLEAN> if its not clean PM it me :p
    A drunk walks into a biker bar, sits down at the bar and orders a drink. Looking around, he sees three men sitting at a corner table. He gets up, staggers to the table, leans over, looks the biggest, meanest, biker in the face and says: "I went by your grandma's house today and I saw her in the hallway buck naked. Man, she is one fine looking woman!"
    The biker looks at him and doesn't say a word. His buddies are confused, because he is one bad biker and would fight at the drop of a hat. The drunk leans on the table again and says: "I got it on with your grandma and she is good, the best I ever had!"
    The biker's buddies are starting to get really mad but the biker still says nothing.
    The drunk leans on the table one more time and says, "I'll tell you something else, boy, your grandma liked it!"
    At this point the biker stands up, takes the drunk by the shoulders looks him square in the eyes and says, "Grandpa, go home, you're drunk!

    and// or. even

    An 80-year-old man went to his doctor for his quarterly check-up. The doctor asked him how he was feeling and the 80-year-old said "Things are great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. So what do you think about that?"
    The doctor considered his question for a minute and then began.
    "I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season.
    One day when he was setting off hunting, he was in a bit of a hurry and accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun.
    As he neared a lake he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge. He realised he'd left his gun at home and so couldn't shoot the magnificent creature but out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favourite hunting rifle and went 'bang,bang'.
    Miraculously, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.
    Now, what do you think of that?" asked the doctor.
    The 80-year-old said, "If you ask me, I'd say somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."

    The doctor replied, "My point exactly".
  2. im_to_hyper macrumors 65816


    Aug 25, 2004
    Glendale, California, USA
    Once there was this person who posted a thread thinking it would be a great idea to create yet another official thread. Then he realized that no one was posting.

    Then the blonde came along and said, "let me help you with your post".

    And then WHAM, a torrential flood of posts came raining upon this thread.

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