Trouble getting started with iCloud - my situation

[Candlelight]

Ok, here's where I stand:

I have no .mac address.
I have no .me address.
I have not bought anything from iTunes so I don't have an iTunes account.
I am running Snow Leopard so until 10.6.9 is released I'll be using Windows 7 to access the Cloud.
I don't own an iPhone or iPad or anything that will use iOS 5.
I don't have any calenders or contacts, I'm not using it for syncronisation between devices, I purely wish to use the 5GB storage for files.

I do have an Apple ID for the App Store. When I try and log into iCloud I get this error:

How do I make my plain and simple Apple ID become an iCloud account? Judging by the error this isn't part of the server issues Apple seems to be having on the first day.

Any help appreciated.

 

[Candlelight]

Even their own website on setting up says:

Enter the Apple ID you used to create your iCloud account and select the iCloud services you’d like to enable.

Where do I do this???