Wouldn't it be more fun to figure it out yourself?
Is like we telling you what's in the novel.
No it isn't. It's a phone.
On a related note: it can be used to read novels on.
No it isn't.
Can't control TV wo an external accessory.
It's a smartphone, not a tv remote. Naturally it doesn't have an infrared port on it without an accessory. Boo hoo.
Still require media to be in Apple's narrow formats.
MP3 and MP4 aren't really that narrow and are readily available. Yes, if you want to put the AVI and MKV files you got off of torrent sites- I mean uh, legitimately ripped off of every bluray you went out and purchased, you have to convert to another format. I recommend Handbrake or if you don't mind dropping $20, iFlicks. The latter converts, labels and imports your movies and shows straight into iTunes.
We're up to the seventh tier of iPhones now, I wouldn't recommend holding your breath waiting for Apple to break it off of iTunes.