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What to expect when you're expecting
- Thread starter floriflee
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Chundles
macrumors G5
Round Two:
- Give the kid an atlas - get him/her to start learning the countries as soon as possible. Give him/her a real sense of global citizenship and that nowhere is better or worse than anywhere else. Basically, give him/her the travel bug - it's the greatest educator there will ever be.
- Read to him/her from as soon as you possibly can. Start teaching him/her to read as soon as you can, don't wait till school. I could read, and mean properly read, when I was 2 and a half and I think it's one of the greatest things my parents gave to me. It gives you a good vocabulary and builds confidence and learning ability when the child can read and interact with ease.
- Team Sport. Great way to build confidence and a sense of belonging. Find something the kid likes and let him/her progress into it at their own pace and never, ever be a "weekend sport parent" standing on the sidelines acting like a drongo cause "little Billy/little Susie" copped a nasty hit. I chose cricket, not a great deal of physical exertion in school comps but it still afforded me the chance to put wimpy opening batsmen either on the ground or in hospital. God I miss bowling fast.... but I digress.
- Playtime with friends using imagination is better than some after-school activity run by an overly happy git dressed in too many colours. There's nothing better than running around playing forts in the dirt when you're a kid.
Man you guys are gonna have some fun. I'm a way off yet from this sort of thing but my advice comes from what I experienced growing up in the Australian Bush/Arizona Desert/Singapore City/Affluent Aussie tourist town and how it compares with how my cousins are growing up to be a bunch of whingy little brats because their parents can't seem to accept that my cousins might be at fault sometimes.
- Give the kid an atlas - get him/her to start learning the countries as soon as possible. Give him/her a real sense of global citizenship and that nowhere is better or worse than anywhere else. Basically, give him/her the travel bug - it's the greatest educator there will ever be.
- Read to him/her from as soon as you possibly can. Start teaching him/her to read as soon as you can, don't wait till school. I could read, and mean properly read, when I was 2 and a half and I think it's one of the greatest things my parents gave to me. It gives you a good vocabulary and builds confidence and learning ability when the child can read and interact with ease.
- Team Sport. Great way to build confidence and a sense of belonging. Find something the kid likes and let him/her progress into it at their own pace and never, ever be a "weekend sport parent" standing on the sidelines acting like a drongo cause "little Billy/little Susie" copped a nasty hit. I chose cricket, not a great deal of physical exertion in school comps but it still afforded me the chance to put wimpy opening batsmen either on the ground or in hospital. God I miss bowling fast.... but I digress.
- Playtime with friends using imagination is better than some after-school activity run by an overly happy git dressed in too many colours. There's nothing better than running around playing forts in the dirt when you're a kid.
Man you guys are gonna have some fun. I'm a way off yet from this sort of thing but my advice comes from what I experienced growing up in the Australian Bush/Arizona Desert/Singapore City/Affluent Aussie tourist town and how it compares with how my cousins are growing up to be a bunch of whingy little brats because their parents can't seem to accept that my cousins might be at fault sometimes.
njmac
macrumors 68000
There has been some great advice in this thread already!
Congratulations!
I liked the book in the title of this thread but at times it seemed a little preachy - like "don't eat chocolate or any sweets, remember your pregnant and you wouldn't want feed your baby chocolate now, would you?" kind of things in the whole book. Just be sensible in eating and excersizing.
I would start subscribing now to Parenting Magazine. There are usually articles worth reading.
Read scem0's thread - and do your own research.
Feeling the baby move is amazing! When you don't feel the baby move for 20 minutes - trust me - you WILL freak out. Every mother does it, but the baby is probably sleeping. Do what it says in the book though - take a glass of orange juice and you should feel the baby start to move again.
If you ever need reassurance that every thing is ok, don't hesitate to call your doctor. He/She will probably be more than happy to let you come in for a quick check. You probably will be surprised at how nerve wracking a pregnancy is! It was always in the back of my mind that I hoped everything was ok.
PM me if you have any questions. I've been through this twice already and I may be able to help! 🙂 THat being said, every pregnancy is different so feel free to ignore advice from well-meaning mom's. 🙂
Congratulations!
I liked the book in the title of this thread but at times it seemed a little preachy - like "don't eat chocolate or any sweets, remember your pregnant and you wouldn't want feed your baby chocolate now, would you?" kind of things in the whole book. Just be sensible in eating and excersizing.
I would start subscribing now to Parenting Magazine. There are usually articles worth reading.
Read scem0's thread - and do your own research.
Feeling the baby move is amazing! When you don't feel the baby move for 20 minutes - trust me - you WILL freak out. Every mother does it, but the baby is probably sleeping. Do what it says in the book though - take a glass of orange juice and you should feel the baby start to move again.
If you ever need reassurance that every thing is ok, don't hesitate to call your doctor. He/She will probably be more than happy to let you come in for a quick check. You probably will be surprised at how nerve wracking a pregnancy is! It was always in the back of my mind that I hoped everything was ok.
PM me if you have any questions. I've been through this twice already and I may be able to help! 🙂 THat being said, every pregnancy is different so feel free to ignore advice from well-meaning mom's. 🙂
njmac that's good to know about the baby movements. I think I will freak out once I start to feel it.
I just bought my first maternity clothing today--a pair of shorts that can be worn now and when I start to show. Very exciting! It was kind of weird buying clothing that I could "grow into." Usually it's the other way around. Ah, already liking some of the perks of this. Ha ha ha!
Chundles, with both of us having some good "globalization" experiences I think your advice on the subject is excellent. I look back and am so thankful for parents that gave us a bit more of a world-perspective when we were younger. Not to mention, I think that both our parents did a good job instilling the need to learn to take resonsibility for one's actions. We also definitely plan on starting the whole reading process early. Neil's already picked out a CD to teach the child ABC's and various vocabulary. He's very gung-ho on that. If he has it his way the child will also probably be walking by 9 months. When he was two or three he dragged his little sister all around the place and got her walking early. 😀
annk and freeny, between you and me I'm pushing for drugs during labor. I see no shame in taking the pain-free way out or no honor in doing it the massochistic way. 😀
Thanks, again, everyone, for the advice!
I just bought my first maternity clothing today--a pair of shorts that can be worn now and when I start to show. Very exciting! It was kind of weird buying clothing that I could "grow into." Usually it's the other way around. Ah, already liking some of the perks of this. Ha ha ha!
Chundles, with both of us having some good "globalization" experiences I think your advice on the subject is excellent. I look back and am so thankful for parents that gave us a bit more of a world-perspective when we were younger. Not to mention, I think that both our parents did a good job instilling the need to learn to take resonsibility for one's actions. We also definitely plan on starting the whole reading process early. Neil's already picked out a CD to teach the child ABC's and various vocabulary. He's very gung-ho on that. If he has it his way the child will also probably be walking by 9 months. When he was two or three he dragged his little sister all around the place and got her walking early. 😀
annk and freeny, between you and me I'm pushing for drugs during labor. I see no shame in taking the pain-free way out or no honor in doing it the massochistic way. 😀
Thanks, again, everyone, for the advice!
balamw
Moderator emeritus
I agree with annk don't rule anything in or out up front, be flexible and roll with the punches. Get used to it you'll have to when the little tike comes along... 😛floriflee said:
My wife had our first with an epidural, but went drug free for #2 but kept the option open until it was too late. She says (after the fact) that she would have preferred not to do the epidural for #1 'cause she would have actually felt it more and known when to push and it probably would have taken less time...
That said, I still have scars on my hands from where she dug her nails into my hands suring birth #2....
I agree with njmac that Parenting magazine can be a good resource, but it gets old after about 6 months since you start seeing lots of the same stuff being recycled & updated. Your OB's office may have offers for free trial subscriptions that might be enough.
We also found that for #1 reading early and often was a big deal. He used to love "Is your mama a llama?" which we had started reading to him in the womb and just whispering it to him when he was fussing was one of the few reliable ways to get him to calm down. #2 didn't get as much time being read to since #1 is around and we are thus busier and it shows. He doesn't pay nearly as much attention when he is being read to and doesn't really respect books, which is a punishable crime in our house since books are everywhere. I hope he'll catch up when #1 starts really reading books to himself.
nbs2, FWIW I concur with anyone who has suggested that you use a hospical with a decent NICU. Son #2 spent the first week of his life in the NICU, even though he was the biggest and only full term baby in there and probably would have been fine regardless. It was the longest week of my life. I was really glad that all they needed to do was take him one floor up.
B
I would recommend a licensed midwife, even if you are planning a hospital setting. A midwife will be with you the whole time during the labor and birth, or nearly so, and that continuity is so important. We felt our midwife was a real advocate for the mother and baby.
