Why is this...?

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by longball11, May 28, 2009.

  1. longball11 macrumors 6502a

    longball11

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2009
    #1
    Why does it seem to me that guys always have to make the first move on a woman. Why do the guys have to ask the girl out?
     
  2. ziggyonice macrumors 68020

    ziggyonice

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2006
    Location:
    Rural America
    #2
    Because that’s the custom. If it were the other way around, the girl would suddenly have control over the relationship, and the guy would be 2nd in command. Sure it can make us nervous, but that's why we're men. And that's why we make the first move. Because it's polite to take nervousness off the girl by doing it for her. And then she looks to you as being the backbone of the relationship.

    Or something along those lines.
     
  3. leekohler macrumors G5

    leekohler

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2004
    Location:
    Chicago, Illinois
    #3
    Wow- the guy has control over the relationship? Boy- do you have a lot to learn. ;) The woman is always in control.
     
  4. Keniff macrumors 6502a

    Keniff

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2008
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    #4

    With all respects (and this isn't directed just at you), buuuut....

    Why is it guys feel the need to come onto MacRumors: Forums and ask for advice about relationships with a bunch of nerds, that sit at home/work playing with themselves and computers all day?

    ;)
     
  5. philbeeney macrumors 6502

    philbeeney

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    Jul 24, 2004
    Location:
    Brampton, ON
    #5
    I'll have you know that I take a break from my computer now and again. :p
     
  6. gaming4fun macrumors newbie

    Joined:
    May 27, 2009
    Location:
    Canada
  7. lancestraz macrumors 6502a

    lancestraz

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 2005
    Location:
    RI
    #7
    Quite a few of the members here have a significant other. They must know something. :)
     
  8. jecapaga macrumors 601

    jecapaga

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2007
    Location:
    Southern California
    #8
    I was just going to say oh really? Ask most men in a relationship who is in control between the two of them, whether it's obvious or subconsciously, and I believe the majority would say the woman holds the key most often. ;)
     
  9. Abstract macrumors Penryn

    Abstract

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2002
    Location:
    Location Location Location
    #9
    People always say that, and it doesn't make any sense arguing about the natural course of things. Guys usually argue that it's some form of sexism or something in our society, when in fact, the male approaches the female in most species. It's not just a "custom" in our society, or in societies all over the World. It's natural for many species. Either the males court the women in some physical way, and the women says, "Sure, lets do it", or the female sends out some sort of signal to a particular male to indicate that she's interested. In the latter case, the male still has to actually "man up" and go to the female. ;)

    Men aren't getting the short end of the stick or anything. I don't really understand why this is an issue. If a girl asks a guy out, then great. However, that's more of an exception rather than the rule.
     
  10. longball11 thread starter macrumors 6502a

    longball11

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2009
    #10
    Then I guess that makes me bad and unattractive with women. I don't ever see them signaling me. :(
     
  11. OutThere macrumors 603

    OutThere

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2002
    Location:
    NYC
    #11
    Last weekend I sat on a couch while three attractive girls I didn't know actively hit on me. Sh** happens. ;)
     
  12. jecapaga macrumors 601

    jecapaga

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2007
    Location:
    Southern California
    #12
    Stop focusing on what they aren't doing and focus on what you're doing. Approach them/her and worst case is you walk away knowing you had the balls to do it in the first place. And trust me, that makes the next time all the more easier.
     
  13. Keniff macrumors 6502a

    Keniff

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2008
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    #13

    Pics?


    ;)
     
  14. MacsomJRR macrumors 6502a

    MacsomJRR

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2003
    Location:
    San Diego
    #14
    Don't you know that happens in Second Life all the time. Only they probably weren't ladies....
     
  15. Melrose macrumors 604

    Melrose

    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2007
    #15
    I thought it was the women that said that. I never hear men cry "Sexist!" when a woman acts in a subordinate way..
     
  16. nobunaga209 macrumors 6502a

    nobunaga209

    Joined:
    Mar 13, 2009
    Location:
    TX
    #16
    It's all in the chics dude; I've had to step up just as many times as I've been approached. Just depends IMO...
     
  17. Macaddicttt macrumors 6502a

    Macaddicttt

    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2004
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    #17
    If the woman's smart, she'll be in charge but make the guy think he's in control. :D
     
  18. leekohler macrumors G5

    leekohler

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2004
    Location:
    Chicago, Illinois
    #18
    Ha! But it's just an illusion! :D
     
  19. abijnk macrumors 68040

    abijnk

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    Oct 15, 2007
    Location:
    Los Angeles, CA
    #19
    Don't give away our secret!!!!
     
  20. Macaddicttt macrumors 6502a

    Macaddicttt

    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2004
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    #20
    You can blame my GF for giving away your secret. Don't worry, though, it still works on us feeble-minded men... We love thinking we're in charge... :eek: :p
     
  21. OutThere macrumors 603

    OutThere

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2002
    Location:
    NYC
    #21
    Now if I'd been taking pics I'd probably be on here asking the same questions as the OP...:p
     
  22. redwarrior macrumors 603

    redwarrior

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2008
    Location:
    in the Dawg house
    #22
    It's been about 50/50 for me over the years. One of the best, most rewarding relationships I was ever in was initiated by me. He was too shy to make the first move, and there was no way I was going to let him get away.:D I think I raised my daughter like that too; she's a great flirt. And she and I are always in control.;)
     
  23. Unspoken Demise macrumors 68040

    Unspoken Demise

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    Apr 16, 2009
    Location:
    >9,000
    #23
    My girlfriend asked me out. I said yes, of course, and then to pick up my jewels told her I was the man and would ask her out. She said yes. Got a girlfriend and my manhood back. Been together 10 months.
     
  24. abijnk macrumors 68040

    abijnk

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2007
    Location:
    Los Angeles, CA
    #24
    I certainly believe that. :D

    For what its worth, I pursued my fiance for about a year before he agreed to our first date, and we've been together for over 6 years now. While this might be unconventional, its certainly not wrong, nor does it lead to an unbalanced relationship.
     
  25. Eanair macrumors 6502

    Eanair

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2009
    #25
    Same here. :)
     

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