To call her a gold digger is a little harsh, I think she loved the old dude, and I think he cared about her. I think he was a father figure that she never had and that is what she needed, someone to love her for her. Was is wise to get married, no. But I think he gave her support that no body else did. I do think he promised her his money and I think she deserved some of it. She probably loved the old man more then his own kids did. This is another story of small town stupid girl gets famous and doesn't know how to handle it. So everyone took advantage of her and she suffered.
She wasn't just a gold digger, she was a talentless gold digger, who wasn't all that great looking in the grand scheme of things. If she had any talent, it was using her body to get what she wanted.
It's likely that some people did take advantage of her but she was doing it, too.
As far as the man's children loving him, do those who grow up with money ever love anyone? Any affection they showed would probably be outweighed by ANS' huge assets.