Some of you may recall my thread where I talked about how I broke up with my girlfriend because even though everything about the relationship was perfect, I just felt like she wasn't the one for me. We were apart for a couple months and each had a short relationship with another person during that time, and then we got back into communication and are semi-dating now again. We love each other and have an amazing time together. I'm really trying to figure this whole thing out and trying to figure out what I'm actually feeling, what I actually want, and what's the best thing for me. One thought that I had about what previously led me to end it was this: We met, we fell in love, and everything went so quickly and so smoothly, that in just a matter of months we came to the point where we Felt like a married couple.. meaning that we sometimes got annoyed with each other, sometimes felt like there wasn't enough of a spark, etc. But perhaps my mistake was in thinking that that's somehow proof that she's not the one for me. Perhaps we were just already at that point where things were so stabilized that it wasn't going to be like the fiery beginning of a relationship every second. That's one thought I have. Any comments on that? When I think about going forward from here, I use my past several years of experience looking for girlfriends, and I project the likely outcome that if I don't end up with her, I'll wish I did and eventually settle for someone less suited for me. I'm a unique person and I have a variety of particular views and opinions which are extremely hard to find matched in a partner, and yet she is completely compatible with me on all counts. Because of this I feel like no matter how hard I searched around for somebody else, I'd always be coming back to her saying "they're just not like you.. they don't get it they don't see things the way we do." One thought I have about that is that that is likely true and that I would be stupid to let her go when she's clearly the one for me. The other thought I have about that is that perhaps that's only the way I feel right now because I love her. I have enough experience to know that when you're in love with someone you feel like you will never share that kind of connection with somebody else. And yet, it is also true that I have never met another girl in my life with whom I was so compatible, from an objective standpoint. I guess overall I'm trying to figure out what it takes to develop a confidence about marriage. It's not in my temperament to reach a "this is definitely it, I know 100%" kind of place on an issue like this. I don't expect to ever feel that way with anybody that I'm with (there's always going to be a leap of faith involved in committing to marry), unless I met some magical girl like in a movie, who was 'looking for me' for years, and we'd just know instantly that we found each other. I admit that somehow hollywood has slightly bugged my brain with this type of fantasy. But that fantasy aside, how do you know that you've found the one?