Are you a recluse ?

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by glocke12, Sep 1, 2008.

  1. glocke12 macrumors 6502a

    glocke12

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2008
    #1
    Just wondering if anyone else is as reclusive/anti-social or just as not well adjusted socially as me.

    I really dont enjoy being around other people, except for short periods of time, or small groups of people. Parties, picinics, etc...bore the hell out of me. Id rather spend time alone reading or listening to music instead of doing any of that. I could go on, but Im sure you get the point. Just curious as to how many others like me out there. I think at times I also relate better to dogs than people...
     
  2. gadgetgirl85 macrumors 68040

    gadgetgirl85

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2006
    #2
    I am exactly the same way. I am very happy on my own doing my own thing. I enjoy spending time with my family as well as friends occasionally but for the most time I am on my own reading, computer etc.
     
  3. cheyennewilson macrumors member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2008
  4. furious macrumors 65816

    furious

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2006
    Location:
    Australia
    #4
    I find it hard to relate to most people. In fact i struggle. I cannot wait to move. Only 12 more months.
     
  5. archesdevil macrumors 6502

    archesdevil

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2008
    #5
    Truth is, I like myself better than just about everyone I meet. So, yes, I am.
     
  6. remmy macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2007
    #6
    I find it a bit strange, by myself I feel quite lonely, yet with a group sometimes I'm a bit bored. The only exception is a very close group of friends, but I even get bored of them if I seem them too much, strange.
     
  7. Sideonecincy macrumors 6502

    Joined:
    Sep 29, 2003
    #7
    Its nice to see there are other people who are like this out in the world. I enjoy going out from time to time, but I like to spend a majority of the time doing stuff on computer, listening to music or playing video games. I get asked alot what I do with my time and why I don't go out very much and feel I am a "loser" to most people...but I don't really care for the most part.

    I have two dogs and I enjoy them more than most people. Just sometimes wish they could talk in a language I understand.
     
  8. Dagless macrumors Core

    Dagless

    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2005
    Location:
    Fighting to stay in the EU
    #8
    I used to like working on my own and hanging out with smaller groups (or ideally just the girlfriend). Now I'm hitting 22 I want to work in a proper team now and get to know more people even though I'm in a job where I just work on my own, for myself. Funny how that works!
     
  9. cristo macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2008
    #9
    There's a big difference between enjoying spending time alone, and being a recluse.
     
  10. redwarrior macrumors 603

    redwarrior

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2008
    Location:
    in the Dawg house
    #10
    I see judgment in everyone's eyes, although I think that is just my perception. I have never fit in anywhere. I have been very successful writing software and I think it is for that very reason that I enjoy it so much. I have connected with very few people in my life, and prefer to be alone most of the time. I most definitely see myself as a recluse.
     
  11. dukebound85 macrumors P6

    dukebound85

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2005
    Location:
    5045 feet above sea level
    #11
    agreed.

    i much prefer having a few good friends over a ton of party pals

    even then, i do not mind hanging out by myself at all and in fact sometimes i choose this over invites to hang out
     
  12. devilot Moderator emeritus

    devilot

    Joined:
    May 1, 2005
    #12
    I can get along all right with people.
    I don't like to be alone.

    But it's unbelievably draining to be around others for long. :eek: Like, physically and psychologically. I'm always pooped after hanging out w/ others. I think I do best with no more than two other people around. But I definitely do not like to be alone all the time (which I am, poo).
     
  13. Scepticalscribe Contributor

    Scepticalscribe

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2008
    Location:
    The Far Horizon
    #13
    Recluse is possibly too strong a term. Possibly. How about that one has a strong capacity - or preference - for one's own company, and one can find the excessive company of others draining? Or that one likes personal space (something increasingly invaded in our 24/7 world, bosses demanding mobile numbers, and so on) and have a considerable capacity for personal autonomy? And yes, the vapid concerns of large gatherings, can be boring and draining; especially if they are emotionally demanding as well. Anyway, it's nice to see a thread full of (not recluses) but discerning types, who choose how they can best interact with the rest of our sometimes difficult species.

    Cheers and good luck fellow-travellers!
     
  14. NC MacGuy macrumors 603

    NC MacGuy

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2005
    Location:
    The good side of the grass.
    #14
    I've been told I am by more than I care to count. Just not a real people person and have mini to major panic attacks before social events. Once engaged, seem to do fine but hate it the whole time. I have to drink to relax and be socially acceptable. That little man in my head makes me want to say what I feel but over the years I've had to conform to the "norm", whatever that may be but I can say, it's not me untethered.
     
  15. vniow macrumors G4

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2002
    Location:
    I accidentally my whole location.
    #15
    Are you going to find any other type on this forum?
     
  16. EricNau Moderator emeritus

    EricNau

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2005
    Location:
    San Francisco, CA
    #16
    No, I enjoy being around people very much, although I do appreciate my alone time as well. I guess you could say I prefer a balance.
     
  17. me_94501 macrumors 65816

    me_94501

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2003
    #17
    I enjoy being around friends and family, but I also enjoy spending a fair amount of time alone. On the other hand, I like to have someone else in the house. :eek:
     
  18. Elven macrumors 6502a

    Elven

    Joined:
    May 13, 2008
    Location:
    UK
    #18
    While I enjoy socializing with some good friends, I also enjoy getting back to my desk, and reading the forums, and doing my own thing. I have found I am happier with my own company.
     
  19. OutThere macrumors 603

    OutThere

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2002
    Location:
    NYC
    #19
    I'm kind of the opposite, in a way. I thrive on being with a group of people, the energy of a crowd, meeting new people. It gives me a buzz. I go through a sort of withdrawal when suddenly alone after being around people.

    That's not to say I don't enjoy time alone, and I do (reading, movies, internet-ing), but it tends to be a stopgap between periods of socializing. Makes getting work done a bit of a challenge. :p

    MacRumors is my fill-in in the summertime when I'm home from college and stuck in a town whose average citizen is 49 years old. I get a little stir crazy without other 18-25s to talk to. :eek:
     
  20. PlaceofDis macrumors Core

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2004
    #20
    i enjoy socializing, but i'm a homebody. meaning i'd rather have friends over drinking here than out at a bar.

    i don't like crowds or the anxiety that comes with going out. at least for me. maybe i have slight agoraphobia, but it does take me a bit to feel comfortable in "new" situations at times. its a hurdle i've been getting better at clearing everyday.

    i'm also incredibly shy at first so that doesn't help. but once i warm up to someone... well yeah.. just the first bit takes a little out of me and then the walls come down a bit.
     
  21. dmr727 macrumors G3

    dmr727

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2007
    Location:
    Southern California
    #21
    I enjoy socializing, and get lonely easily. But I also have to mix in areas of alone time. My wife's an airline pilot, so it works out well - I get my alone time while she's gone.
     
  22. c-Row macrumors 65816

    c-Row

    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2006
    Location:
    Germany
    #22
    That describes me best, I guess.

    If I am at home alone, I am bored and want to get out of there, but once I am in a public place - say, a pub - I start thinking, "What the hell am I doing here anyway," get bored and want to go home again. Even if I stay there, I usually sit there on my own. It's not that I don't like being alone, it's the lack of choice that bothers me.
     
  23. Iscariot macrumors 68030

    Iscariot

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2007
    Location:
    Toronteazy
    #23
    Absolutely. I'm non-aggressive, but I have a tendency to bite when pressed against skin, usually a result of being tangled up. While many of my bites are minor and harmless, a small number of bites produce severe dermonecrotic lesions, severe systemic symptoms, including organ damage and although rarely, a systemic condition with occasional fatalities, usually in small children and those with a weak immune system. If bitten, you should apply an ice pack to control inflammation, aloe vera to soothe and help control the pain, and you should seek medical care. If I can be easily captured, I should be brought with you in a clear, tightly closed container.
     
  24. glocke12 thread starter macrumors 6502a

    glocke12

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2008
    #24
    hmm...lots of interesting replies. A large part of it with me is that I like learning (even at the ripe old age of 40) and reading, so when I have free time I often try to use that to educate myself a little more.

    Also, like someone else in this thread said, since we are pretty much a 24/7 society now, with constant streams of input (work, internet, tv, etc). I often find myself just wanting to "unplug", and spend a couple of days hiding out from the rest of the world (no going out, tv off, car in garage so people think I am not at home, etc..). It is very restful to be able to spend time like that (to me anyway), and is also mentally stimulating as I find it allows my mind to wander quite a bit.


    I only mention the word "recluse" (which may be too strong), because I was comparing my lifestyle to that of many friends I have who feel the need to be around other people often.
     
  25. Mord macrumors G4

    Mord

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2003
    Location:
    UK
    #25
    I can't stand being alone though I'm definitely not extroverted, I can't stand group conversation as I end up just sitting watching people talk unable to enter the conversation. If I have someone to myself I'll chatter away happily but as soon as a third person enters the picture I'll just lock up.

    I can't stand television, I find it an assault in my peace of mind, I prefer to cut myself off from popular culture as I find it's poisonous to my mind.
     

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