Boy do you have some serious anger issues, to jump to sexual orientation based slander that quickly. Not to mention the degree of your overall tone, is "honestly mind-blowingly scary".
Either way you're ignoring that the phones aluminum in skin tight jeans or pants. Continued force over a thigh muscle is going to bend a thin malleable object, it's basic engineering.
If you want to carry an almost 500 dollar item around and choose to not be semi cautious, well then you reap what you sew.