Best piece of advice.

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by HEALER FLAME, May 18, 2019.

  1. AlliFlowers Contributor

    AlliFlowers

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    #26
    When would it not be good advice?
     
  2. willmtaylor macrumors G3

    willmtaylor

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    #27
    There are many things that ought not be tolerated - untruth, oppression, abuse, etc.
     
  3. Altis macrumors 68030

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    #28
    All the times you should not have to tolerate things.

    You shouldn't tolerate pain, poor behavior, violent partners, dishonesty, discrimination, etc, etc.

    I'd rather advise to stand up for what you truthfully be right and good.
     
  4. AlliFlowers Contributor

    AlliFlowers

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    #29
    I was thinking more of being tolerant of people who think differently than you do.
     
  5. Altis macrumors 68030

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    #30
    That's my point, "tolerance" isn't inherently a general good or good piece of advice, really.

    And you'll have to forgive me if I doubt how well people who preach "tolerance" in the way you define it apply it themselves. I mean, nothing says "tolerance" like "#RESIST". ;)
     
  6. AngerDanger macrumors 601

    AngerDanger

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    #31
    Ever since I found out about InspiroBot, it's been my exclusive source of advice.

    IMG_2425.JPG

    IMG_2427.JPG
     
  7. HEALER FLAME thread starter macrumors 6502

    HEALER FLAME

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    #32
    ♡Never show your beautiful girlfriend to your best friends. Best friends will take a bullet for you but wil nevet bear to see you with a beautiful woman o_O:D
    --- Post Merged, May 21, 2019 ---
    Many years ago in my early 20's i lost my soul friend when one of the most beautiful gal in our community fell in Love with me. Jealousy, enviously, short and badly fussed temper killed our friendship.

    Of course we can't generalise but watch out :)
     
  8. decafjava macrumors 68030

    decafjava

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    #33
  9. AlliFlowers Contributor

    AlliFlowers

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    #34
    You do understand the difference, don't you? I can be tolerant while resisting the intolerance shown towards me.
     
  10. badatusernames macrumors regular

    badatusernames

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    #35
    Don’t hold on to grudges. It will eat your soul.
     
  11. scubachap macrumors regular

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    #36
    It will pass...

    (Good times, bad times, even humanity itself)
     
  12. Scepticalscribe macrumors Westmere

    Scepticalscribe

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    #37


    A sign of insecurity, I would have thought, or a sign that you are pretty young.

    A secure and confident person would have no issue with this, and "beautiful girlfriends" are neither possessions to be flaunted nor treasures to be locked away and hoarded, they tend to be human beings with their own lives, ambitions, and goals.

    Anyway, such envy, and jealousy are his problems, not yours. If that is his character, I doubt that this would be confined to "beautiful women" but would probably extend to professional matters as well.
     
  13. yaxomoxay macrumors 68040

    yaxomoxay

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    #38
    Are you telling me that I built a full sized dungeon for naught? :eek:
     
  14. HEALER FLAME thread starter macrumors 6502

    HEALER FLAME

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    #39
    Its not a sign of insecurity. life is full of surprises. Being trustworthy with those who are very close to me taught me a hard lesson. Its got nothing to do with confidence and insecurity.
     
  15. HEALER FLAME thread starter macrumors 6502

    HEALER FLAME

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    #40
    And why are you focussing on girlfriends and their life's/feelings???

    We are talking about mistrust, back stabbings and jealousy of best friends. You seem always to divert from the subject. Anyhow lets end it here.
     
  16. Scepticalscribe, May 21, 2019
    Last edited: May 21, 2019

    Scepticalscribe macrumors Westmere

    Scepticalscribe

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    #41
    Yes, I suppose that I am.


    Actually, it is a sign of insecurity - especially on the part of former friends.

    And I pointed out that this happens also in the professional world. In fact, jealousy is more prevalent in that environment than in the personal.

    In truth, you will rarely remain friends with many of those with whom you were inseparable when you were young, even though that may seem unthinkable at the time.

    It is not just jealousy and insecurity (on their part, or yours), it is also that you change, they change, your respective life priorities, interests, destinies, ambitions, and life journeys change, and you grow apart.

    There will come a time where you won't see some of them for decades at a time. When you do see them, in some cases, conversation will dry up after five minutes - not out of jealousy - but just that you may not have much to say to one another any more, and neither of you are really all that interested, apart from a brief, benign exchange.

    Then, there will be others where - irrespective of time or distance since you last met - you will be able to take up where you left off.
     
  17. HEALER FLAME thread starter macrumors 6502

    HEALER FLAME

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    #42
    Cool. Your comments taken inboard
     
  18. Scepticalscribe macrumors Westmere

    Scepticalscribe

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    #43
    The people with whom you will be able to resume ties - despite years, decades, continents apart - will be those for whom common circumstance (i.e students at the same time, or work colleagues) was not the main - or only - driver of the friendship.

    Rather, character and personality - and possible common interests, or a sense of humour - define the friendship, and not circumstance, or, rather, shared experience and circumstance can reinforce the bonds of friendship, but the friendship wouldn't be able to continue if you didn't like the character of the person in question.

    A lot of young friendships occur because you are in the same place (mentally, socially, professionally, spatially) at the same time; once those common circumstances no longer exist, the foundations of the friendship itself may be a lot less stable.
     
  19. Altis macrumors 68030

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    #44
    It's a blanket opposition to a person/presidency, rather than a position or idea that he promotes. That's intolerance.

    And you're not tolerating views that you find intolerable -- which is my point, but then you can see that "tolerance" is not always a good thing. Often, it is not.
     
  20. HEALER FLAME, May 21, 2019
    Last edited: May 21, 2019

    HEALER FLAME thread starter macrumors 6502

    HEALER FLAME

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    #45
    That person( my best friend) was a far relative and we grew up together in the same street, we did everything what two best friends does for many years. So the foundation was there.

    Because of that sudden and unexpected love triangle i was going to write a book called "Twisted Hearts"

    Not being loved by that beautiful young woman it was extremely hard for my best friend to swallow. So things start to change very quickly.

    Its true, jealousy and enviously can become lethal and harmful if one party felt rejected and undesired by the person whom he madly in love.

    After all humans are animals so it was just nature taking its course when my best friend did what he did.

    Here are two male Lions butchering each other for a female..

     
  21. Khalanad75 macrumors 6502

    Khalanad75

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    #46
    If you are going to hate another person, hate them for who they are, not what they are.
     
  22. Scepticalscribe, May 22, 2019
    Last edited: May 22, 2019

    Scepticalscribe macrumors Westmere

    Scepticalscribe

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    #47
    We are not lions, but humans.

    Lion patterns of social organisation are not how humans run or arrange their lives.

    And secondly, if your former friend displayed such jealousy and envy towards you because a woman (or girl) he fancied preferred you, that does not reflect well on him, in terms of friendship or relationship material.

    If he is that envious and jealous towards someone who was formerly a close friend, I would hate to see him in a relationship with a woman who wished to put an end to the relationship, where his issues of jealousy, and possibly possessiveness, would be even more pronounced.
     
  23. willmtaylor macrumors G3

    willmtaylor

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    #48
    Raise your children; spoil your grandchildren.

    Spoil your children; raise your grandchildren.
     
  24. HEALER FLAME thread starter macrumors 6502

    HEALER FLAME

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    #49
    Well....this is the power of Love and women if you know what i mean.
     
  25. Scepticalscribe macrumors Westmere

    Scepticalscribe

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    #50
    No, I don't to be honest.

    In fact, if anything, it strikes me as not being about "the power of love" but rather, as being about jealousy, possession, and desire, (both sexual desire and the desire to flaunt the fact that one has attracted someone deemed attractive by many), and the desire not to lose face (by being rejected, or by having been seen to have been rejected) or the perception that one has not been treated respectfully.

    None of this is any basis, let alone a good basis, for constructing, sustaining or maintaining a long term relationship (or friendship, for that matter).
     

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