Bras Hazardous to Your Health

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by rdowns, Nov 11, 2008.

  1. rdowns macrumors Penryn


    Jul 11, 2003

    I urge all women to go with the natural look. Your health may depend on it.

    In related news, thong malfunctions may be hazardous to your health. I urge all women to ignore this and keep wearing thongs. :D:D
  2. Blue Velvet Moderator emeritus

    Jul 4, 2004
    OK. I'll take mine off, just for you. Brrr, it's cold in here.
  3. Queso macrumors G4

    Mar 4, 2006
    Damn. Best take mine off too.

    Can I keep the high-heels on though?
  4. Mord macrumors G4


    Aug 24, 2003
    Most women wear ill fitting bras for vanity sake, I know a fair few who have incurred injuries due to bands that are too tight.

    Just because you can fit into a smaller size than what your measures say doesn't mean you should.
  5. edesignuk Moderator emeritus


    Mar 25, 2002
    London, England
    I knew it.

  6. themoonisdown09 macrumors 601


    Nov 19, 2007
    Georgia, USA
    The motorboat... oh yeah!!!
  7. themoonisdown09 macrumors 601


    Nov 19, 2007
    Georgia, USA
    Shouldn't this thread be in the Current Events section?
  8. Foxglove9 macrumors 68000


    Jan 14, 2006
    New York City
    I ditch the bra, especially in the summer, but generally things look better when I wear one.

    Thongs I can't stand.
  9. GoCubsGo macrumors Nehalem


    Feb 19, 2005
    I'm not ditching the bra (it's hugely necessary) or the thong (hugely unnecessary but fun in its own right).

    I am doing mankind a great service by keeping the bra on. People should thank me and make me a freaking trophy!
  10. iBlue macrumors Core


    Mar 17, 2005
    London, England
    Going without is even more hazardous to their appearance, so I'll keep with the over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders, because gravity is a much bigger threat. :D But yeah, poo on Victoria's Secret. Their bras suck anyway.
  11. Melrose Suspended


    Dec 12, 2007
    I thought all women loved thongs? Or maybe that's just a chauvinistic cultural more that has deluded my poor male brain.. Personally, I don't see what the big hubbub about those things is...

    And brassieres are only meant to deceive the grandiose male mind into thinking she's got more than she really does. So many girls pad themselves up waaay too much.
  12. Mord macrumors G4


    Aug 24, 2003
    I for one find anal floss uncomfortable.
  13. Lau Guest

    Hear hear. Also not a fan of the look of them either, I think they make arses look weird. :D
  14. Melrose Suspended


    Dec 12, 2007
    You are slowly restoring my faith in wholesome women. :) Boyshorts anyone? Are they really all that popular?
  15. iBlue macrumors Core


    Mar 17, 2005
    London, England
    THEY DO! (at least on most normal non-photoshopped asses) I don't love or hate thongs but I usually only wear them when there is a risk of VPL. VPL FTL! :p

    edit: oh and some varieties of boyshorts can thwart the evils of VPL. I still have to get those superman pants.
  16. Lau Guest

    The boypants are my undergarment of choice! Boypants FTW, I say.

    Blue, indeed. Undergarment that makes arse look fabulous & is comfortable > undergarment that has arse-distorting properties & is hideously uncomfortable, I say.
  17. jodelli macrumors 65816


    Jan 6, 2008
    Windsor, ON, Canada
  18. Cave Man macrumors 604

    Cave Man

    Feb 12, 2007
    Neander Valley, Germany; just outside Duesseldorf
  19. Foxglove9 macrumors 68000


    Jan 14, 2006
    New York City
    Boyshorts are the best. And yes they are popular, mostly with the younger generation I notice.
  20. question fear macrumors 68020

    question fear

    Apr 10, 2003
    The "Garden" state
    I second that!

    Honestly, I haven't worn victoria's secret bras in years. I once went to them for a bra and their measurements determined I was a frighteningly large bra size. Then they handed me a bra that could have held two bowling balls per side and assured me that when I tried it on it would fit. When it obviously didn't, I went to the dept store in the mall and got a real measurement from people who can use measuring tape. The saleslady at the Nordstroms did think it was hysterical that VS thought I needed a 40DD bra (I'm a 36D).
  21. JNB macrumors 604


    Oct 7, 2004
    In a Hell predominately of my own making
    This next story is a true story.
    It concerns two of my favorite subjects:
    industrial theft . . . and-a t-ts!
    Mmm, what a combo! This is the story . . .
    The inventor of the modern foundation garment
    that we women wear today was a German scientist
    and opera lover by the name of Otto Titsling!
    This is a true story.
    His name was Otto Titsling.
    What happened to Otto Titsling shouldn't happen to a schnauzer.
    It's a very sad story. I feel I have to share it with you.

    Otto Titsling, inventor and kraut,
    had nothing to get very worked up about.
    His inventions were failures, his future seemed bleak.
    He fled to the opera at least twice a week.

    One night at the opera he saw an Aida
    who's t-ts were so big they would often impede her.
    Bug-eyed he watched her fall into the pit,
    done in by the weight of those terrible t-ts.

    Oh, my god! There she blows!
    Aerodynamically this ***** was a mess.
    Otto eyeballed the diva lying comatose amongst the reeds,
    and he suddenly felt the fire of inspiration
    flood his soul. He knew what he had to do!
    He ran back to his workshop
    where he futzed and futzed and futzed.

    For Otto Titsling had found his quest:
    to lift and mold the female breast;
    to point the small ones to the sky;
    to keep the big ones high and dry!

    Every night he'd sweat and snort
    searching for the right support.
    He tried some string and paper clips.
    Hey! He even tried his own two lips!

    Well, he stitched and he slaved
    and he slaved and he stitched
    until finally one night, in the wee hours of morning,
    Otto arose from his workbench triumphant.
    Yes! He had invented the worlds first
    over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder. Hooray!

    Exhausted but ecstatic he ran
    down the street to the diva's house
    bearing the prototype in his hot little hand.
    Now, the diva did not want to try the darn thing on.
    But, after many initial misgivings,
    she finally did.
    And the sigh of relief that issued forth
    from the diva's mouth
    was so loud that it was mistaken by some
    to be the early onset of the Siroccan Winds
    which would often roll through the Schwarzwald
    with a vengeance!

    But little did Otto know,
    at the moment of his greatest triumph,
    lurking under the diva's bed
    was none other than the very worst
    of the French patent thieves,
    Philippe DeBrassiere.
    And Phil was watching the scene
    with a great deal of interest!

    Later that night, while our Brun Hilda slept,
    into the wardrobe Philippe softly crept.
    He fumbled through knickers and corsets galore,
    'til he found Otto's titsling and he ran out the door.

    Crying, "Oh, my god! What joy! What bliss!
    I'm gonna make me a million from this!
    Every woman in the world will wanna buy one.
    I can have all the goods manufactured in Taiwan."

    "Oh, thank you!"

    The result of this swindle is pointedly clear:
    Do you buy a titsling or do you buy a brassiere?
  22. Blue Velvet Moderator emeritus

    Jul 4, 2004
    Sometimes. Depends on the brand.

    I'm not going to bore anyone with my knicker problems; you don't want to get into them.

  23. iBlue macrumors Core


    Mar 17, 2005
    London, England
    <breaks into a verse of "do your boobs hang low... "> :D

    butt you don't know who might want a crack at it. http://upc.*************/uploads/smilies/ron_wink.gif

    <cymbal crash>
  24. Blue Velvet Moderator emeritus

    Jul 4, 2004
    Hehehe. This thread has reminded me that I really really do need to do some shopping. Unfortunately, there will be no pics... it'll be mostly practical and unglamorous bits and pieces.
  25. Abstract macrumors Penryn


    Dec 27, 2002
    Location Location Location
    1. Replace your bra with my hands.

    2. ?????

    3. Profit!

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