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College students?
- Thread starter Buschmaster
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you should see if you can get a single... even if the room is smaller its way worth it... i lived in a single freshmen and soph. near and i miss it
he should use headphones, next time he is bothering you just bring it to his attention. its not an unreasonable request
I feel what you're going through so strongly. My 2nd year I got into res with a bunch of my friends and one stranger who was assigned next door. Like your roommate, she played thumpy music to get herself motivated for class early in the morning, for God knows what else during the day, and for bed at night. Sometimes she would play the music for eight or ten hours straight (eventually I became so frustrated that counting in disbelief was the only thing I could think to do). This was at a time when I was applying to the Creative Writing program here at UBC and was spending long nights making and polishing my manuscript.
The one thing I can recommend is not to push it with your roommate if you encounter resistance. I think even the tiny pressure applied by a gentle request to turn the music down can provoke obstinancy in some people, and in my case outright hostility. I was sucked into a pretty negative and aggressive spiral that involved, worst of all things, angry letters, and all it did was exacerbate the issue until it completely consumed my mind. Your roommate will tell everyone she knows nasty things about you if she perceives you as spoiling her fun; she will buy a newer, bigger stereo system at Christmas.
I don't really have a solution for you. Like you, moving out wasn't an option because of the hassle during the busy school year (and I had friends there, also), but mediation was not really an option either because of the drain it would take to enforce. Earplugs can be painful, headphones inadequate, and leaving for elsewhere humiliating. In the end, I simply had to adapt as best I could, with thicker skin, and weather it until the end of the year.
I can still never quite believe that there are people out there who do not try to understand others. At least be sure that you're in the right. What it comes down to is that no one should willingly engage in an activity that makes someone else's life unhappy.
The one thing I can recommend is not to push it with your roommate if you encounter resistance. I think even the tiny pressure applied by a gentle request to turn the music down can provoke obstinancy in some people, and in my case outright hostility. I was sucked into a pretty negative and aggressive spiral that involved, worst of all things, angry letters, and all it did was exacerbate the issue until it completely consumed my mind. Your roommate will tell everyone she knows nasty things about you if she perceives you as spoiling her fun; she will buy a newer, bigger stereo system at Christmas.
I don't really have a solution for you. Like you, moving out wasn't an option because of the hassle during the busy school year (and I had friends there, also), but mediation was not really an option either because of the drain it would take to enforce. Earplugs can be painful, headphones inadequate, and leaving for elsewhere humiliating. In the end, I simply had to adapt as best I could, with thicker skin, and weather it until the end of the year.
I can still never quite believe that there are people out there who do not try to understand others. At least be sure that you're in the right. What it comes down to is that no one should willingly engage in an activity that makes someone else's life unhappy.
you mean "there in edinburgh"
some rooms at my uni are shared... and a vast minority (i'm stressing the point of how few) are en suite.
consider yourself lucky
I saw a couple of unis that offered twin rooms, but most do singles, naturally when I applied I just went straight for the self catered single room en suite most expensive choice, thus I'm with 4 toff's sharing a kitchen.
We all respect each others privacy, that's not to say we don't all have fun together, we've had our nights of cranking the sound system singing along to sweet home alabama at 5AM for example just we'll all be up singing to it as we all went out to get drunk together. We all realised pretty early on that the best idea was to become best friends and let things go for the first couple of weeks, then mesh our lives so we try not to rub each other the wrong way. We've not had a single argument so far and we're all thinking of getting a place together when we move out of halls.
It's probably a bit late for it now but in the future I'd try to forge a friendship as a paramount priority, most of the people here I'd not likely be friends with were it not for the fact I live with them but we are now and I'm glad of it.
I'm not so much lucky, just now poor, my rent is £76 a week :0, I can't deal with catered food and I need my own shower so it's not really an option to live anywhere else.