Creepy Crawlies

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by Malsi, Jun 11, 2010.

  1. Malsi macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2009
    Location:
    St. Louis, MO
    #1
    Today I awoke to a house centipede on the wall across from me. My natural instincts prompted me to dispose of this vile hellion and send it back to the depths of which it came. The only problem is that it's near the door.

    I have a fear of anything that has more than four legs (except bumble bees, I find them to be cute). So if I were to kill this abomination I would have to leap from my bed to the door, land with a roll against the floor to the hallway closest that houses my weapons and amunition. Of course this was all in my imagination because I'm an overweight twenty six year old male, and the only thing I could accomplish is to make the rest of my family wake to the rumbling sounds of my body coming into contact with the walls and floors (perhaps ceilings too). All this just to prevent the nasty critter of torture from coming into contact with my flesh.

    After I took the time to calm down abit and think rationally, the creature of many appendages made it's way from the door to a corner of the room. I take this chance to grab a change of clothes and run to our pearly white throne. While I relax and bask in my victorious escape from that spawn of nightmares, I contemplate if I should destroy the things material shell and send it back to the abyss from whence it came. Or should I pretend to never have seen it, and allow a sibling bring it's demise in my place ( this would be my first choice).

    Unfortunately things didn't go the way I had planned. My enemy has picked up on my trail and made it's way to the pearly white throne upon which I sat. Of course it's presence was noticed the second it entered my private sanctuary but since I was at my most vulerable, I couldn't move from the throne. In order to keep myself away from it as much as possible I had to lift my legs to keep my feet off of the floor. Let me tell you, it's not an easy thing to do when fearing for your life and relieving yourself. Luckily, the demonic thing seemed to look for a portal to it's world, so it avoided me. I proceded to tipy toe on the side of the bathtub to clean and dress myself. Then while it made it's way to my stall of purification I jumped over it's massive form to the door and made my way to the weapons closet. I grabbed my container of holy mist (Raid), my bo-staff (broom) and steel armour boots (moms slippers).

    I made my way back to the chamber of purification and unfotunately for it, the thing was still there. Heaven was with me, on spray of the holy mist incapacitated it in the first attempt. I then proceeded to jab it a couple of times with my staff of holy might, and finally I completed the return of it's soul to the vile pits by severing any link it had to it's material form (I crushed it over and over with my moms slipper until it became a watery mush).

    Today I am victorious, tomorrow who knows.............

    What experiences have you had with creatures of may legs? Do you have the same fear of them that I do even though were larger than them? Share your horror stories here!
     
  2. R94N macrumors 68020

    R94N

    Joined:
    May 30, 2010
    Location:
    UK
    #2
    Personally I'm not affected...

    I don't mind creepy crawlies. I don't think it's nice when people kill them. They can't help it if they are ugly or 'horrible' as some people think. I understand if you are scared of them, though, but personally I'm not too bothered by them. I do have a friend though who doesn't like spiders.
     
  3. CartoonHeroII macrumors member

    CartoonHeroII

    Joined:
    Apr 21, 2004
    Location:
    Rigby, ID
    #3
    Ha ha ha! I enjoyed the story-telling form of your post. Made me :)
    I can't say that say that I'm afraid of multi-legged creatures, and I usually try to just let them be. But Hobo spiders are like my arch-nemesis. Every time I see one I go into a rage until either it or I are dead. So far I have been successful in every encounter.
    This morning I met one of these critters while I was showering. The little bugger popped up on top of the shower curtain and commenced to run around. I thought about just leaving it until I wasn't wet with shampoo in my hair, but decided to show no mercy and kill it ASAP.
    I'll have to post a picture when I get home of the creepiest crawly-thing ever. My roommates and I named it the "tarantula-worm." I'll let your imagination run wild with that one for a few hours :p
     
  4. iBlue macrumors Core

    iBlue

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2005
    Location:
    London, England
    #4
    *applause* That was a really hilarious post!

    I grew up in the US, where spiders are a lot nastier than the average polite little british spider, but that knee-jerk reaction of fear and "Get the frig away from me!" is still there. I used to have Hobo spiders in my house (google image one of their bites, I dare/warn ya) and this made me endlessly nervous.

    Freakin bugs.
     
  5. unid macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2009
    Location:
    Traffic_island_bay
    #6
    Great.

    Spiders tend to make me jump, however they fascinate me, heres one that lives nearby.

    [​IMG]
     
  6. rdowns macrumors Penryn

    rdowns

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2003
    #7

    Welcome to my Buddy List.
     
  7. mariahrg macrumors member

    mariahrg

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2004
    Location:
    Paso Robles Ca
    #8
    potato bugs, earwigs, grasshoppers/crickets, and cockroaches. i can not handle them at all! i will hang out with spiders and snakes and aliens and ghosts all at the same time before ill hang out with one potato bug or earwig.
     

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  8. Jason Beck macrumors 68000

    Jason Beck

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Location:
    Cedar City, Utah
    #9
    For those too lazy, here is the bite.
    They look kinda like brown recluses.. Living in the USA.. we got nasty bugs in places. Look at Lindsay Lohan for example.

    I ALWAYS WONDERED WHAT THIOSE WERE. They came out after it rained in SoCal.. and they were hard to kill!@ @&^%# DUDE.. I had bad dreams growing up about those things. NASTY!

    I hate them. Now at least I know what they are. Thanks!!!! Been wondering for years. When I was little and saw one, I tried to explain it to people.

    "It looked like a gigantic ant with fangs or mandables or something!"
     

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  9. mariahrg macrumors member

    mariahrg

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2004
    Location:
    Paso Robles Ca
    #10
    us folks in the US think we got it bad. lets just pray for our soldiers in the mid east that have to deal with the camel spiders. that has to be the nastiest pest in the whole world!
     
  10. lewis82 macrumors 68000

    lewis82

    Joined:
    Aug 26, 2009
    Location:
    Totalitarian Republic of Northlandia
    #11
    The worst we have where I live are earwigs. They are really disgusting, and when they sting, it bleeds.

    The worst is that they hide in cracks, under rocks, stuff like that. And they gather by hundreds.

    [​IMG]
     
  11. Jason Beck macrumors 68000

    Jason Beck

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Location:
    Cedar City, Utah
  12. Malsi thread starter macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2009
    Location:
    St. Louis, MO
    #13
    /fist bump, /high five

    Concerning spiders, as long as they're the smaller non bird devouring type, and lack the black and red coloring of the black widow, I don't really mind them. That is if they keep their distance and stay in the corner, otherwise it's full out war! I've seen pictures on google search of the huge Clock Spider, and the bird eating ones, and let's just say I'll probably burn down my entire apartment complex if I've seen them anywhere.
     
  13. Antares macrumors 68000

    Antares

    #14
    That's horrible. Insects deserve the right to live as much as any other creature. I can understand exterminating destructive insects like termites, carpenter ants, moths and mosquitoes. Those type of insects can actually damage your property. However, centipedes and the like are helpful insects. The eat the destructive type insects....poisonous spiders, for instance. Plus, they don't harm humans...they stay away.

    If I encounter an insect in the house, I usually capture it in a cup and release it outside. Mosquitoes are vermin, though, whom I swat on sight. I shudder at carpenter ants since we had an infestation when I was a kid. They are the most disgusting creatures that I've ever seen. Giant, plump, shiny black ants. They're worse than termites and 3x as large.
     
  14. Jason Beck macrumors 68000

    Jason Beck

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Location:
    Cedar City, Utah
    #15
    2 years ago here in Cedar City, Utah I was walking into the bedroom of our apartment to talk to my wife and wake her up. She was taking a nap.

    "Honey..."
    "...Yah *sigh* *yawn*", She said sleepily.
    "Don't.... move...", I said while both my hands are outstretched in a calming motion.
    "Whats .. on.. me!?" She exclaimed really scary-like and worried.
    "A black-widow spider the size of my fist..."


    I kid you not guys.. that thing was like 5-6 inches or so with legs outstretched and it was crawling very slowly up the side of her head. We lived in a basement apartment. Nuff' said right? Well after that and the scorpions, we moved out.


    There was even a freaking frog on our floor one day when we came home.
    "Honey.. is that .. a frog?"
    LOL.
     
  15. mariahrg macrumors member

    mariahrg

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2004
    Location:
    Paso Robles Ca
    #16
    ok! im officially creeped out! ill be at the next forum over...looking at rainbows and butterflies.
     
  16. Malsi thread starter macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2009
    Location:
    St. Louis, MO
    #17
    While I understand your point of view it's still hard for me to let them go. Remember they are all agents of darkeness, the stuff of nightmares! What would you do if you woke of to a centipede crawling around in your mouth, or a spider crawling out of your nose!

    Give them the chance and they will do it! Then we will be at their mercy and go down to the bottom of the food chain! We must show them their place and squash them when they cross the line.

    In all seriousness, it's either I kill it or I don't sleep, and I really can't program myself to change. I hate the crawlies with all my heart, and every time I see one, I begin to think hundreds of their familes are between the walls waiting for me so sleep.
     
  17. ethical macrumors 68000

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2007
    #18
    Ohh God I hate creepy crawlies! Not quite to the extent that the OP does...but looking at these pictures sends a shiver down my spine.

    I don't mean the lame spiders we have here in the UK, but the nasty 'exotic' bugs that can do you some damage...that bite from the hobo spider is horrible!
     
  18. Malsi thread starter macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2009
    Location:
    St. Louis, MO
    #19
    What happened after you told her what was wrong? I would have lept up and started screaming like crazy! Then I would proceed to the shower and cleanse myself with chlorine and scolding hot water! If I ever get enough money to move out of the Midwest I'll be moving to colder climates!
     
  19. Jason Beck macrumors 68000

    Jason Beck

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Location:
    Cedar City, Utah
    #21
    AHAHAH dude... she was like shaking so bad... I think I went over and used something and swatted it off her. Then when we looked in the storm window thingy, there was like this big family of them living there in the leaves and stuff.

    Totally not cool.


    <---------------------------------------------------------------------->
    It was probably a little bigger than that with legs outstretched.
     
  20. dukebound85 macrumors P6

    dukebound85

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2005
    Location:
    5045 feet above sea level
    #22
    eff that. i kill those lil demons if they dare enter my house lol
     
  21. Jaro65 macrumors 68040

    Jaro65

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2009
    Location:
    Seattle, WA
    #23
    That was one funny post, OP!

    I normally just scoop these things into a plastic cap from a nearby spray can, and off they go through the window onto their next adventure.
     
  22. andalusia macrumors 68030

    andalusia

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2009
    Location:
    Manchester, UK
    #24
    You realise that measurement all depends on somebody's screen resolution? God help the person working at 600x800 on a 20 inch screen :p

    Regarding the black widow, it's one of the, if not the, most venomous spiders on the planet, is it not? How the hell did you get the courage to even go near that thing?!

    Truly truly horrifying.

    However the OP's story was highly amusing, and written very well. Thanks for the laugh! I hope you encounter another bug soon and tell us all about it ;):D
     
  23. Malsi thread starter macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2009
    Location:
    St. Louis, MO
    #25
    You're more than welcome, writing that helped me calm myself after that escapade. I still want to take everything out of my bedroom and the rest of the apartment and just clean the whole place but it's expected to rain/thunderstorm everyday this week, so I can't.
     

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