How do I make my PC run slower?

johnbro23

macrumors 6502a
Original poster
Apr 12, 2004
770
0
Pittsburgh, PA
I'm trying to convince my parents to buy a new PC for the family. I have CAD stuff I want to to that our PC can't handle.

I've already taken out 256MB ram, from 512MB. Our PC is surprisingly clean as far as virii go. I was just wondering if there's some little app that I can download or something I can do that would make the PC run 50% or more slower that is indetectible (i.e. it doesn't show up in the Task Manager or the bottom right of the screen).

I was thinking... is it possible to underclock the processor? It's a 867mhz PIII.

Any other ideas?
 

CanadaRAM

macrumors G5
johnbro23 said:
I'm trying to convince my parents to buy a new PC for the family. I have CAD stuff I want to to that our PC can't handle.

I've already taken out 256MB ram, from 512MB. Our PC is surprisingly clean as far as virii go. I was just wondering if there's some little app that I can download or something I can do that would make the PC run 50% or more slower that is indetectible (i.e. it doesn't show up in the Task Manager or the bottom right of the screen).

I was thinking... is it possible to underclock the processor? It's a 867mhz PIII.

Any other ideas?
Devious little beggar, aren't you... :D
 

grapes911

Moderator emeritus
Jul 28, 2003
6,943
3
Citizens Bank Park
Why not just save up and buy another PC for yourself? If you can afford a good CAD program that required a newer PC, I'm sure you can afford a new PC.
 

homerjward

macrumors 68030
May 11, 2004
2,745
0
fig tree
EMP?
:p
if it's a homebuilt you should be able to lower the bus speed and/or multiplier (thus underclocking it) in BIOS but most oem's use a custom BIOS that has that junk locked. umm...
download KaZaa? use AIM? visit certain porn sites? (methods of getting virii/spyware)
 

johnbro23

macrumors 6502a
Original poster
Apr 12, 2004
770
0
Pittsburgh, PA
grapes911 said:
Why not just save up and buy another PC for yourself? If you can afford a good CAD program that required a newer PC, I'm sure you can afford a new PC.
I already have an eMac, and I'm getting a Intel PB when I go to college next fall, so hopefully that will run AutoDesk software.

But my parents have been talking about getting a new PC for two years and I'm sure they're going to get one right when I go off to college. I'm just trying to get them to give in a little earlier so I can enjoy it too.
 

johnbro23

macrumors 6502a
Original poster
Apr 12, 2004
770
0
Pittsburgh, PA
stoid said:
Have you tried installing Windows XP?
haha, yea seriously. We have XP and it slows down the computer considerably.

I don't want to load it up on spyware and virii... my parents will just say that's a problem with the OS, and that a new computer won't fix those problems.

So I'm looking for things that will only mess with speed.

And its a Dell, I don't think I can mess with the bus speed.
 

dubbz

macrumors 68020
Sep 3, 2003
2,284
0
Alta, Norway
johnbro23 said:
XP

What's DMA? How do you turn it off?
Control Panel > System > Device Manager. Locate the IDE controllers (likely named 'Primary' and 'Secondary IDE controller' or something similar). Right click and Properties. Look for Transfer mode or DMA in one of the tabs, and set it to 'PIO'.

Installing lots and lots of fonts will slow it down. As will not having enough diskspace for the swap file. So fill that disk up.

Edit: Another thing that may, or may not, have some effect:

Control Panel > System > Advanced > Settings (Performance) > Advanced > Set from 'Programs' to 'Background Services' and 'System Cache'.
 

johnbro23

macrumors 6502a
Original poster
Apr 12, 2004
770
0
Pittsburgh, PA
dubbz said:
Control Panel > System > Device Manager. Locate the IDE controllers (likely named 'Primary' and 'Secondary IDE controller' or something similar). Right click and Properties. Look for Transfer mode or DMA in one of the tabs, and set it to 'PIO'.

Installing lots and lots of fonts will slow it down. As will not having enough diskspace for the swap file. So fill that disk up.

Edit: Another thing that may, or may not, have some effect:

Control Panel > System > Advanced > Settings (Performance) > Advanced > Set from 'Programs' to 'Background Services' and 'System Cache'.
I changed both Primary and Secondary to PIO. It's still pretty snappy (as far as basic apps like IE goes). Where do I find fonts to install?

I can't just fill up the hard drive. My dad knows how to check the available space on the hard drive, so if he sees it went from 11.3GB free to 431KB, he'd know something was up.
 

dubbz

macrumors 68020
Sep 3, 2003
2,284
0
Alta, Norway
johnbro23 said:
I changed both Primary and Secondary to PIO. It's still pretty snappy (as far as basic apps like IE goes). Where do I find fonts to install?
You'll probably need to reboot, if you haven't already. And you may not notice if the system is already slow.

As for fonts... Google is your friend. Plenty of sites with free fonts out there. You'll need several 100, maybe near a 1000, for it to have any kind of effect though.

If you can't fill the drive: In the same window where you set 'Programs' to 'Background Services', click on the Change button under Virtual Memory. In the new window, set the Initial Size and Maximum Size to something far less. 100-200, or something. It might cause some Out of Memory messages to be displayed so be careful.

Alternatively, you could set the Initial Size to something really small and leave the Maximum Size as-is. The constant change of the swap file size should slow things down... and it shouldn't display any suspicious out of memory messages.
 

0098386

Suspended
Jan 18, 2005
21,553
2,886
Aww a P3! i LOVE P3! and i don't know why.

tell you what... give me the P3 and i'll give you my AMD-K6 :p or some 386 lying around.
 

nicorojas

macrumors member
Jul 18, 2003
83
0
Chile
Some time ago I used a little problem called Mo'slo to play some old DOS games in my windows box.

Here is the link.

It used to work very well.
 

0098386

Suspended
Jan 18, 2005
21,553
2,886
Try getting your HD fragged up. That is a major cause of slowdown, for me at least. download lots of (legal) bit torrent files to get the HD all mushed up and out of place. make sure the HDD is nearly full otherwise XP will be able to defrag it. i think you need less than 14% freespace to defrag.

If the target isn't especially computer literate try slightly pulling out (on a P3 system you must have...) the VGA cable at an angle so the colours get messed up.

Fill your computer with spyware. click the pop up ads that say "click me!" *do you wish to instal happy friendly smiley packs? aka dangerous system destroyer*

Hey if you want meltdown just pour water in the system then claim you where nowhere near the machine.
 

johnbro23

macrumors 6502a
Original poster
Apr 12, 2004
770
0
Pittsburgh, PA
I don't feel too bad about doing this because my dad has a new Vaio for his work computer, so my mom, who checks her email and surfs ebay will hopefully complain about the slow speed and decide to get the new computer now instead of later.
 

im_to_hyper

macrumors 65816
Aug 25, 2004
1,094
206
Pasadena, California, USA
johnbro23 said:
Our PC is surprisingly clean as far as virii go.
First off: my favorite quote from redflagdeals.com:

http://www.redflagdeals.com said:
There are very few words that when pluralised, end in 'i'. Cactus is one. Fungus is another. Virus is not one of them. Neither is monkey. And no, neither is penis.
Anyway, in terms of slowing down your PC... play a lot of "free" online games that are actually full of spyware. Try to find some e-mails ridden with viruses and foward them to the primary e-mail address used on that computer.

Slow down speed some more... hmm... does your dad know how to check RAM size, too? If you want, I have a spare 64MB chip laying around :D Stick that in instead of your 256er and you'll be good to go! Or if you really wanna make it have issues, I have 32MB sticks as well.

Now, you want to replace your computer with a Mac, right? Good.