I need help, just got escorted home by the police

[Zombie Acorn]

Drinking is not cool. It doesn't mean that you are mature. It just means that you cling to something that you think makes you feel better about yourself. Chances are you need something better to do with your life.

People under 30ish that drink (I generally believe that older people started drinking, smoking, and other things before the true harmful effects were known to the general public) are followers at best. They watched tv and friends, and this is the only thing they knew how to do when getting away from mommy and daddy.

In some weird parts of the world, drinking is even associated with toughness. Drinking doesn't make you tough. At best, it makes you stupid.

Given that most of the world's population are followers at heart, it is futile trying to make this point because normal individuals cannot beat society.

You have to take it upon yourself to realize that you are wasting your time and money.

As a social drinker who enjoys the taste of good beer and liquors I have to disagree, there is nothing wrong with drinking, its fun and makes for good discussions.

As for the OP, I find the best solution to police issues involving under aged drinking is to have a good story set up and lie. In the US we have an artificially high drinking age limit, what the cops don't know can't hurt them. Just make sure your friends are in on the story and you'll be fine.

 

[Saluki Alex]

I wanted to chime in here on the legal understanding of the OP's incident.

Contrary to common understanding, an arrest does not necessarily result in being taken to a police station/being booked/handcuffed etc.

That being said, the definition of an arrest (in the US at-least) is: to stop; to seize; to deprive one of his liberty by virtue of legal authority.

Moreover, the further legal definition (again in the US) of an arrest occurs whenever a reasonable person 'would have understood the situation to constitute a restraint on freedom of movement.' Additionally, to constitute an arrest, no actual force or manual touching of the body is required; it is sufficient if the party be within the power of the officer, and submit to the arrest.

Bearing this and the OP's story in mind, if he had been in the US, he would have indeed been technically under arrest, but instead of being charged he was released into his parents custody.

I do not know how or if Canadian law corresponds to the American understanding of arrest; nevertheless I feel that the OP should feel lucky nothing worse happened, whether legal or medical in regards to the other minors he was with.

 

[ethical]

As a social drinker who enjoys the taste of good beer and liquors I have to disagree, there is nothing wrong with drinking, its fun and makes for good discussions.

As for the OP, I find the best solution to police issues involving under aged drinking is to have a good story set up and lie. In the US we have an artificially high drinking age limit, what the cops don't know can't hurt them. Just make sure your friends are in on the story and you'll be fine.

If they made non-alcoholic beers and liquors that tasted exactly the same as the alcoholic versions.... would you drink those instead?

-------

To many people drinking/getting drunk is a legal "high"... except it's quite the opposite of a high. It's a way to detach yourself and get a feeling that isnt the same as normal.

OP: Just let it blow over. Your parents will forget about it, you will forget about it, and in two years time it will become a funny story to tell at the dinner table.

 

[ob81]

So it scares you knowing there are people who don't spend their lives throwing up and shouting in the streets?

Wow, thank you. People say anything these days. The fact that he even had a reply to that scares me a bit.

It isn't being wound up. We have a 16 year old kid here asking for help about alcohol. That is it. I think people missed the point.

You didn't make any differentiation in your post. Next time, don't make blanket statements and people won't have to call you out.

I already attempted to clear this misunderstanding up. I blamed myself for people taking what I said as directed towards them, not the op.

You are saying this after the fact. Either you didn't understand when I cleared that up, or you are just running your mouth.

Whatever you need though to help you sleep at night. Yeah, you called me out big man.

 

[Don't panic]

Drinking is not cool. It doesn't mean that you are mature. It just means that you cling to something that you think makes you feel better about yourself. Chances are you need something better to do with your life.

People under 30ish that drink (I generally believe that older people started drinking, smoking, and other things before the true harmful effects were known to the general public) are followers at best. They watched tv and friends, and this is the only thing they knew how to do when getting away from mommy and daddy.

In some weird parts of the world, drinking is even associated with toughness. Drinking doesn't make you tough. At best, it makes you stupid.

Given that most of the world's population are followers at heart, it is futile trying to make this point because normal individuals cannot beat society.

You have to take it upon yourself to realize that you are wasting your time and money.

you are so full of it:
drinking ≠ getting drunk

guess what? most people drink beverages because they like the taste, because it enhances the food they are eating or because it provides a generally pleasant experience.
they drink moderately and never get even close to getting drunk.
Besides, unlike smoking, drinking in small quantities has no significant deleterious health effects. on the contrary, it can even be beneficial -i.e.:red wine

i suppose you must never had a glass (or even half a glass) of a very good wine.
You don't know what you are missing.

 

[Don't panic]

If they made non-alcoholic beers and liquors that tasted exactly the same as the alcoholic versions.... would you drink those instead?

yes, if they were 'exactly' the same.

only, i doubt that is possible, except maybe for beer.
in wine and liqueurs, liquors and spirits in general, the alcohol content is an essential part of the taste, drinking experience and pairing with food.

 

[Chimpy]

Something sounds fishy - just four people hanging out quietly drinking in a house and yet the cops get called? Methinks we aren't hearing all of the story .

 

[brad.c]

drinking ≠ getting drunk

To the mature imbiber, yes. But this part of ob81's post explains his point of view quite well.

We have a 16 year old kid here asking for help about alcohol.

I still get a little kick out of a second glass of wine, and enjoy doing so around the dinner table with friends and family. I also remember that the point of drinking was much different at the OPs age level. I think we, as a society, need to stop glamorizing the concept of falling down drunk at the kegger, and focus instead on benefits of moderation.

 

[arkitect]

I think we, as a society, need to stop glamorizing the concept of falling down drunk at the kegger, and focus instead on benefits of moderation.

Glamorous?
Yikes!

 

[annk]

To be honest, i was drunk when i made my original post.

And i was scared and freaking out

The fact that you were drunk when you were posting just shows that you do NOT know your limits.

Your folks found things in your room you shouldn't have had, you snuck away to drink with other minors, you lied to the police, you made enough of a racket for the neighbors to call the cops. One of the girls you were with drank so much she got sick.

Kids who drink and don't know their boundaries (an inexperienced drinkers don't) end up in hospital emergency rooms all the time, getting their stomach pumped or being treated for alcohol poisoning. Sometimes they pass out, aspirate their own vomit and become brain damaged. I know someone who works in an emergency room, and she says this is a regular scenario.

You just don't get any of this, it seems. Take your punishment with good grace and make better choices in the future. Be very, very glad nothing worse happened. You got lucky.

 

[TJRiver]

Oh the joys of being young... [-thinks back-]

I am suppose to tell you to not drink, but then I would be a hypocrite. Just drink less. Don't drink SO much that you can't remember you already told the cops you didn't have any ID. You don't know your limits.

Besides, limits change depending how (de)hydrated you are; it is different everytime.

An adult suggesting a minor follow the laws is not a "hypocrite", it is exercising common sense. A 16 year old who "knows his limits" is an oxymoron. Alcohol and underage women do not mix (with statutory rape laws anyway.........)

I have no problem telling the OP to quit drinking until he is of legal age.

 

[brad.c]

Glamorous?
Yikes!

Yikes, indeed.

I was thinking more along the lines of this or that.

 

[spillproof]

An adult suggesting a minor follow the laws is not a "hypocrite", it is exercising common sense. A 16 year old who "knows his limits" is an oxymoron. Alcohol and underage women do not mix (with statutory rape laws anyway.........)

I have no problem telling the OP to quit drinking until he is of legal age.

I see where you are coming from. But because I started drinking at 14 and currently less than 2 months from being of age (21 US), I feel weird telling someone underage I don't know they can't/shouldn't drink. But, that will have to change soon.

On a side note I've been thinking about, drinking legally sounds less fun. There is a thrill of hiding drinking or just how much you've drunk from your parents.

 

[electroshock]

I grew up with friends who drank, as a teenager, and got to see some of the things that happens when drinking goes bad.

One night, a friend was drinking then at 1am, left and walked along a dark and mostly unlit street. Got hit by a car and didn't survive. We got the town to put up lights and improve the road, but too late. We'd rather have him back than the lights.

Another time, a buddy got so *****faced that he ended up sitting in the shower stall and puked there all night. In the morning, the host made him clean up completely before he was allowed to leave. The girls there were so turned off by all this.

Another time, at a different frat, brothers were doing their Friday night drinking and was hazing a new pledge by essentially forcing him to drink so much. He ended up passing out and they left him, so that he could sleep it off. The next afternoon, they found his cold body. He had choked on his own vomit during the night.

Another time, a buddy was arrested by police, had car towed ($250 cash to get it back), lost his license for a year, had to bum rides or ride a bicycle to work daily, went to court for trial, paid a lawyer thousands of bucks to defend himself, dealt with higher insurance rates, etc... He narrowly avoided being convicted on a felony count, but was found guilty of a misdemeanor DUI. As a result, he's not allowed to enter Canada unless he works at least 10 years to apply for a rehabilitated offender waiver and hope it's accepted.

Sometimes, teenagers will do the wrong thing in responding to an alcohol or drug-related crisis because they're more worried about the consequences of being caught. I remember the time a teen didn't make it when he passed out because instead of his friends calling 911, they tried to let him sleep it off hoping to not draw police/ambulance/parents attention to the situation.

Now, the OP's story had a happy ending. But in real life, sometimes things turns out bad. Alcohol is just too dangerous to mess around when a teenager without adult supervision (or at least an adult in the house and aware).

The police let the OP off real easy, and it sounds like the OP's parents are being relatively easy on the OP if it's just no internet/phone/computer for a while. I do hope the OP learned a better lesson other than "don't get caught next time".

For the OP, my best tip is to wait until you're of legal age to drink. Or if you really must drink, do it with an older adult around nearby. Then again, if you really must drink and repeatedly, parents may be worried of the drinking potentially growing into a bigger problem. They've got a lot of stuff on their mind when they think about situations like this.

 

[cantthinkofone]

You forgot "and plant a swift one in the posterior when necessary". Don't worry, it's a metaphorical swift one.

So, let's review:
1) OP failed to realize that since he's underage, his limit is zero.
2) OP decided that since drinking at his house was out, he should go somewhere else to do it.
3) OP lied to police.

If the OP were my kid, he wouldn't be going anywhere except school for a copious amount of time and would become intimately familiar with an long list of arduous household tasks and chores.

Agreed. Your underage. Enjoy it while it lasts. When you turn 18 you start getting bills and your car starts breaking, etc etc.

 

[ob81]

I grew up with friends who drank, as a teenager, and got to see some of the things that happens when drinking goes bad.

One night, a friend was drinking then at 1am, left and walked along a dark and mostly unlit street. Got hit by a car and didn't survive. We got the town to put up lights and improve the road, but too late. We'd rather have him back than the lights.

Another time, a buddy got so *****faced that he ended up sitting in the shower stall and puked there all night. In the morning, the host made him clean up completely before he was allowed to leave. The girls there were so turned off by all this.

Another time, at a different frat, brothers were doing their Friday night drinking and was hazing a new pledge by essentially forcing him to drink so much. He ended up passing out and they left him, so that he could sleep it off. The next afternoon, they found his cold body. He had choked on his own vomit during the night.

Another time, a buddy was arrested by police, had car towed ($250 cash to get it back), lost his license for a year, had to bum rides or ride a bicycle to work daily, went to court for trial, paid a lawyer thousands of bucks to defend himself, dealt with higher insurance rates, etc... He narrowly avoided being convicted on a felony count, but was found guilty of a misdemeanor DUI. As a result, he's not allowed to enter Canada unless he works at least 10 years to apply for a rehabilitated offender waiver and hope it's accepted.

Sometimes, teenagers will do the wrong thing in responding to an alcohol or drug-related crisis because they're more worried about the consequences of being caught. I remember the time a teen didn't make it when he passed out because instead of his friends calling 911, they tried to let him sleep it off hoping to not draw police/ambulance/parents attention to the situation.

Now, the OP's story had a happy ending. But in real life, sometimes things turns out bad. Alcohol is just too dangerous to mess around when a teenager without adult supervision (or at least an adult in the house and aware).

The police let the OP off real easy, and it sounds like the OP's parents are being relatively easy on the OP if it's just no internet/phone/computer for a while. I do hope the OP learned a better lesson other than "don't get caught next time".

For the OP, my best tip is to wait until you're of legal age to drink. Or if you really must drink, do it with an older adult around nearby. Then again, if you really must drink and repeatedly, parents may be worried of the drinking potentially growing into a bigger problem. They've got a lot of stuff on their mind when they think about situations like this.

Pretty deep experiences there. Since I am normally the one that doesn't get drunk, I dedicate myself making sure that everyone that I was drinking with was attended to if they got out of hand. That got old fast though.

 

[spillproof]

...
I remember the time a teen didn't make it when he passed out because instead of his friends calling 911, they tried to let him sleep it off hoping to not draw police/ambulance/parents attention to the situation.

...

For the OP, my best tip is to wait until you're of legal age to drink. Or if you really must drink, do it with an older adult around nearby. Then again, if you really must drink and repeatedly, parents may be worried of the drinking potentially growing into a bigger problem. They've got a lot of stuff on their mind when they think about situations like this.

Wow, sorry about your friend.
I remember back in highschool we had an assembly about drugs and alcohol and they talked about a kid who was left by his friend to die because they did not want to get into trouble. His mothers store was so touching, I actually was tearing up.

But I wanted to touch on something similar to what you mentioned. I think the fear of getting caught stems a small part from the parents. It is perfectly fine for parents to tell their child/ren that they do not want them to drink. But if the parents talk about groundings, punishments and other threats for drinking, the will fear seeking help in an emergency.
I have seem if first hand the threats parents give their children about doing things, and from what I have seen and heard, threats lead to more desire to do the condemned act.

A child has to know that their parent/s will always help them if they are in trouble and that doing the right thing, such a calling for a ride rather than drive drunk or calling 911 if someone passes out, far outweighs the punishment in terms of trust.

Just my thoughts. As that is the way myself and many friend were raised. "We want you to be smart about drinking. Remember what we talked about [eating before drinking, not leaving drinks unattended, drink water often]. Don't be afraid to call us if anything goes wrong. We love you and just want to see you safe. If you need ride, call us anytime, even if its 3 in the morning. We rather see you safe that dead somewhere on the road. We will never get mad if you do the right thing."

 

[pengpai]

you're young, drinking too much is bad for your health. and you have to know what is right and what is wrong. just be a good boy. good luck!

 

[sdsvtdriver]

I bet that is the last time you open the door for the cops eh?