Nope, for several reasons (limited to my use case):
1. Storage is a deal breaker: I currently have 2 TB in both my MBPs in RAID 0 to sync three-ways with a 2TB iMac 27". Last I checked a while ago, they make 2TB drives that fit, meaning I can have 4TB in there and more as my needs increase.
2. Upgradeability: I can upgrade the RAM, HDDs to SSD and any combination of the 2 (since I can have 2 drives in there) at will. No need for a life-sucking trip to the Apple Store or price-gouging the cost of parts/labor.
3. Expandability: My 17 has an Expresscard slot, meaning I can plug into anything they make cards for (currently used for connecting to E-SATA enclosures holding all my older drives full of stuff).
4. Existing infrastructure: I have several decent firewire enclosures I don't want to get rid of yet, as well as music-making hardware that uses firewire as connectors.
I just don't think it's time to upgrade yet.
For my needs, these machines suit me just fine. I'll wait until TB3 and USB-C become standard, and lower-cost, higher-capacity, third-party SSDs are available for Mac portables. Unless Apple starts soldering those in, then I'm done with them permanently.
Bummer, old slow macs with slow spinner storage and 2 out of your three iPads were duds. I see why you are here bemoaning Apple. Apologies.