I'm not pretending that this is a medical diagnosis, but I wanted to see if some people have any experience with this. My wife is 61 and I'm noticing more and more instances that I find worrying. Both of these occurred within the last two weeks.
1. I do the grocery shopping and she writes down whatever items she needs. A new item appeared on the list, Knudsen's "Simply Nutritious" Morning Blend Juice.
I went shopping and didn't see the product. When I got home I explained that I had bought everything except that item. She told me the store where I would likely find it, and I started a new list, with that item (written exactly as she had) for the next time I went shopping.
The next morning, she's looking at the new list with that one item on it, and asks, "what's this?" She didn't recognize the very item she had asked for and we talked about the previous day.
2. She bought a new car that she's been driving for nearly a year. Last week, while we were both in the car, I pointed to the Emergency Lights button which is displayed prominently and remarked that I hadn't noticed it in all the times I've been in the car. She agreed that she also hadn't taken notice of that button.
One week later, we driving off to a restaurant and she points to that same button and asks, "What's that?" I told her it's the button that activates the emergency flashing lights, to which she replies, "Oh. I've never noticed it before."
The examples you mentioned would not, in themselves, be a cause for concern. Not remembering a button is nothing, and not remembering something on a list - in itself - is nothing; I stared at a recent credit card statement, puzzled for a minute or two until I recalled the reason for one entry.
Besides, there are some things you never learn, either because they are too complicated, or you just don't need to; for example, I never mastered - and neither did my parents, or brother - how to work - as in programme - a VTR.
However, if it is part of an increasingly consistent pattern of behaviour, then, yes, you could have cause for concern.
While an annual check-up - and perhaps a memory test - are very good ideas, do bear in mind that someone who is somewhat cognitively impaired can manage to put on an impressive performance when tested.
The first time my mother had her memory tested, she performed so impressively that the doctor could see little evidence of anything wrong, whereas one of my two brothers had been saying for years (correctly - he saw her at intervals of months and so could see changes) that her memory was 'shocking'; now, her memory had never been good, she was not the sort who could spit out historical dates when things happened the way I can, or, one of my brothers can, whereas her memory & mind for executive coping, organising, multi-tasking, problem-solving and functioning was excellent.
She was also of the generation that didn't want to be seen to give trouble, and had been brought up to be polite, and thus, would respond 'nothing' when asked 'what's troubling you?' or 'fine' to 'how are you'. I'd be the one snarling 'you're not fine, you wouldn't be here (at the doctor's) if you were' which would annoy her - she would see it as 'letting the side down', and unsettle the doctor, who, legitimately, wanted to address the patient (and not me), and treat her as an autonomous being for as long as possible.
My mother has vascular dementia, plus Alzheimer's - the third variant of this condition; until a PM takes place, this will not be a definitive diagnosis, but this is what we are pretty sure we are working with.
She was diagnosed in 2012, but only after a year of visits to the doctor and tests, and medical professionals looking for the wrong things (i.e. they thought she had vertigo for a while).
@Clix Pix wrote an excellent post which is worth heeding, and
@D.T.'s point about checking out whether or not she has a UTI - surprisingly common in older women and extremely debilitating - my mother is prone to them and they really exacerbate her condition - is also worth looking into.
The things I would look out for include a consistent difficulty finding the right words - everyone will occasionally struggle to find a word; withdrawal from social situations - and/or from situations that are not familiar.
Other things to look out for are falls or loss of balance; loss of interest in hobbies, withdrawal from hobbies, or inability to do hobbies (my mother's ability to complete crosswords - at which she used to be an absolute fiend, she had devoured the thesaurus - deteriorated sharply in the years just prior to her diagnosis) or activities that used to be of interest - even if they are solitary (by 2012, my mother - who had adored gardening, used to sit in her garden, unable to potter).
Later, may come loss of interest in grooming, or eating; and the hilarious but heart-breaking spelling mistakes on lists.
Or basic maths - addition, sequence of numbers, - or days of the week - working out correct change in shops - this stuff might present challenges.
I would definitely have her checked out. My dad has had several mini strokes. The first one I happened to be home visiting them (I was an adult and living in a different state). My dad was reading the newspaper and was flabbergasted to learn that Payne Stewart the golfer had died, as he and my mom had attended the US Open he had won earlier that year. The problem is that his plane had crashed several months earlier, and it seemed to be breaking news to my dad. He has had several others since then, but none have been debilitating.
But with your wife, there are any number of things that could cause memory loss, some of which might be treatable, or something that you could do to reduce the progression.
I hope all is well with her.
Good post, but - if you are not paying attention, or, are away, - even headline news may not register in a memory. However, the mini-strokes (very much a factor with vascular dementia) would be a cause for concern.
With my mother, her falls were misdiagnosed for the best part of a year; the medical profession treated the consequences of the falls - she had to be hospitalised after a few of them - thinking they were dealing with vertigo, or Meniere's disease, rather than what we now know were how her mini-strokes manifested themselves.
These mini-strokes came in clusters, - and weren't always accompanied by falls - and we would notice a striking deterioration in her mental state immediately afterwards, which would then plateau - the characteristic 'step-wise' deteriorating nature of this condition.
There have been more than a few times when I've come home from work and found a bowl of soup in the microwave that she had intended to eat for lunch ... but forgot about.
Hm. Once or twice is okay - phone calls, or distractions, the doorbell - but regularly?
What are her masking - or compensating skills - for (identified) deficiencies like?
I'd schedule an annual check-up, - a detailed one - and perhaps a memory test or two if that can be done discreetly.
