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Life's in a rut

dukebound85

dukebound85

macrumors Core
Original poster
Jul 17, 2005
19,218
4,342
5045 feet above sea level
It's been 7.5 months

I'm not happy

I have no life outside of work.

I try doing stuff but I always do it alone as I have no friends.

I go play basketball but always by myself.

Cant play catch with anyone

can't go golf with people

can't go to a theme park with anyone

Work is ok but not enticing

No one to hang out with outside of work

No one to talk to in person

Im homesick

I have no idea what I want to do with my life

My car leaks oil

Had an awkward date......

hurts my psychie more than i thought,

even if we didnt mash well

Maybe no one likes me

Maybe there is a problem with me

Chances are there is

ill just live alone

may as well

only one who gets me is me

I dont want to go to work tomorrow

I need to go to work tomorrow

I want to take a mental health day

No, make that a mental health month

I have no friends in this godforsaken state

This community is my only vent avenue

really sucks when i get a temporary ban as then i have no solace when i get home

maybe im addicted to mr

maybe im not

maybe i dont know where else to go

maybe im foolish for posting this

perhaps i no longer care

im homesick

i have no sense of fulfillment

i dont know what to do about it

my job is the only tie to this place

should that be the only reason for being out here

i dont think it should

why did i ever do this

i cant afford to move home

im homesick

i feel i post these "pity" threads more than id like

i feel no matter your response, it wont help

why do i bother posting

why do i bother seeking advice

i have no idea

maybe its just to write it out

im sorry for making you read this

the ramblings of my mind..

ill regret this thread when i wake up tomorrow

screw it, people dont care

only people who will look after me is me

maybe i just need to learn this

i will never leave my comfort zone again

have a good night
 
Hey duke, aren't you a mechanical engineer? What kind of work are you in?

I can't promise anything, but if you're interested I think I know of some folks - business associates - that might be able to put out some feelers.

But seriously, this is not your first post along these lines; you haven't seemed happy in NY for a long time, if ever. You might seriously consider a change in scenery. Let me know if you want me to contact anybody for you.
 
dukebound85 said:
It's been 7.5 months

I'm not happy

<snip>
Click to expand...
Only you can choose to be happy or not.

Try to focus on the good things in your life. You are blessed and have many things to be thankful for.

jmann said:
Life is a bitch™ and then you die.
Click to expand...
One of my favorite quotes. :)

It's true -- especially at certain times in one's life.

jmann said:
Get out and make friends. :) Talk, mingle, connect. You have to have a few friends.
Click to expand...
Sage advice.
 
dukebound85 said:
Work friends and all are my parents age, with families

area is very "old" demographic wise

not young person friendly

all my good friends are back home




since beg of feb
Click to expand...

Would you ever consider moving to NYC? Plenty of young, single people here and you'd definately have a "life". Or, if NYC is not your thing, what about another city?

You can lead a life of indentured servitude anywhere reallly. Use your mental health day to look for jobs.
 
Didn't you want to learn how to fly? Learning something new is a good way to get out of a rut, and I'm sure you'll meet new people around the airport.

Just a thought.
 
I hear ya,
I moved to a different area of my state and have yet to make any new friends. The folks my age where I live prefer doing stuff that I don't, i.e., drink and party etc, etc. That's not something I do, in fact I generally don't drink. So that limits my social interactions to 0.
 
You don't need friends and stuff to be happy, find something you can do on your own that you enjoy and do it.

I have very few friends and am doing programming at the moment for the App Store. Are you into that? Do you like computer games? Find a hobby and do it, keep yourself occupied. If you keep thinking about not having friends then it will obviously affect you.

As for dates, just wait until someone you get along with cones along. It'll happen.

And anyway, you will eventually make friends anyway.
 
Hey Duke -

I live in NYC but I have outgrown my friends. Going to a lounge getting retard drunk or going to eat Thai every weekend ( I HATE thai!!!) isn't my form of fun any longer.

I sit home. ALOT. I go to movies by myself. Go walk around by myself. Do everything by myself. My phone doesn't ring unless its good ole mommy asking me if she can bring me food :eek:

Sometimes I'm like good thing Im doing this by myself (say shopping where I dont have to wait for another girl to make her purchase and try every shirt on -Im a quick shopper). Sometimes it gets rather frustrating tho. People have their hang out pics on social sites and Im like UGH F- U.

I dont have a bf/gf - kuz where the hek am I supposed to meet people? I dont go out anywhere - I also dont enjoy bars etc.

I think Im deciding that for whatever reason, at this time - I have all this solitude around me. Looking back, I did have these periods and they come and gone.

I hope this helps.
 
Try signing up to eharmony or one of those other sites.

I'd do that myself but wife is kind of funny about me dating - go figure :eek:
 
Duke, your post is almost like a poem. A narrative on dissatisfaction. A sad person's tome.

What words could I have, that others didn't say? Find friends, start dating? No, perhaps moving is the only way.

New York, as a State, is truly a beast. Beautiful for some, empty for others. But for those without work, you have a job, at least.

There are always options, for you to take. Join a club, a singles group or just "eff it" and leave. The choice is yours to make.

Looking for a job could be rather tough. The market is grim. Any type of change would be rough.

Though, no matter what, something is quite clear. You need a revolution. Your life needs to veer.
 
Duke- did the military end up not appealing to you? I really think you need to look into that more. Either that, or see if you can transfer to NYC. You'd make friends there fast. I have tons of friends there and I don't even live there.
 
I feel ya brother. I moved here (Greece) June of last year. Ive been here nearly every summer of my life, and I have a lot of family here. I got the same feelings you did early on. Pretty much all of last summer, I went to the beach alone. I had a few people that I was friends with, but no one to really hang out with. I had no job, and I was contemplating on whether to move back or not. But after opening up a little, and getting more use to the language, things started to change. Ive been able to make some more friends, I got a pretty good job, and things are just looking up in general. The point is is that life is like a roller coaster; we all have our ups and downs. Its good to get things off the chest, but dont let these things bother you. You have to make the best out of the situation.
 
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